jojo88 Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 last year met this guy who i connected with on every level we ended up in bed a good few times. Last time we were in bed he told me that he would never make a committment and that he knew that i wanted more. we have met a few times since for coffee and today we met could tell he is attracted to me. He's not willing to take it further. i know if i ignore this guy and treat him as a friend then he will come running. I have no probs getting attention but for some strange reason because this guy is not pursueing me it makes me crazy for him. He told me today that if he showed interest in me that i would no longer be interested in him. What can i do now?? please give me your thoughts
Author jojo88 Posted January 4, 2008 Author Posted January 4, 2008 Please click one of the Quick Reply icons in the posts above to activate Quick Reply.
blind_otter Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 If he's not interested, he's not interested...
allina Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 last year met this guy who i connected with on every level we ended up in bed a good few times. Last time we were in bed he told me that he would never make a committment and that he knew that i wanted more. we have met a few times since for coffee and today we met could tell he is attracted to me. He's not willing to take it further. i know if i ignore this guy and treat him as a friend then he will come running. I have no probs getting attention but for some strange reason because this guy is not pursueing me it makes me crazy for him. He told me today that if he showed interest in me that i would no longer be interested in him. What can i do now?? please give me your thoughts So why and how is he a soulmate? Please click one of the Quick Reply icons in the posts above to activate Quick Reply. ???:confused:
Author jojo88 Posted January 4, 2008 Author Posted January 4, 2008 why is he my soulmate, just feel we have loads in common and huge amount of chemistry there. he has trust me to tell me private stuff and i in him.
shockandawed Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Soulmates don't play games with each other....The problem is you don't have one major item in common..you want a relationship and he doesn't. Soulmates are inseperable, not really the case here. He is attracted to you and enjoys shagging you..nothing more. If you want more than this, I would strongly suggest moving along to someone else.
Enema Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Last time we were in bed he told me that he would never make a committment Treat em mean... because this guy is not pursueing me it makes me crazy for him. To keep em keen... He just wants you for sexor and is playing games. Definitely not soulmates.
Rooster_DAR Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 met my soulmate and we ended up in bed and now he wants to be friends This is all the evidence one needs to break anyone away from thinking there is such a thing as soulmates. This happens all the time, your only weakness was your overwhelming feelings for him and believing someone is somehow magically your love of a lifetime. Sorry if I'm abrasive, hope things work out for you. Cheers!
mortensorchid Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Your soulmate? Sorry hon, he's not your soulmate. He's just looking for a bed partner not a life partner. A "nice guy" would have more class than to act like he has to you.
Kamille Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 met my soulmate and we ended up in bed and now he wants to be friends This is all the evidence one needs to break anyone away from thinking there is such a thing as soulmates. This happens all the time, your only weakness was your overwhelming feelings for him and believing someone is somehow magically your love of a lifetime. I have to agree with this one, for having experienced the same thing you have. I thought he was my soulmate but alas, it turned out he was nothing but someone who enjoyed ripping my heart out. There is no practical advice we can give other then, if you believe in soulmates, then you can also beleive that if you two are meant to be together, it'll happen somewhere down the road. In the meantime, move on and see if you don't have another soul mate out there, one who actually wants the same things you do.
Nemo Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 i know if i ignore this guy and treat him as a friend then he will come running. That sounds like a plan. I ignore most of my friends, too.
whichwayisup Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 This guy isn't your soulmate. If he was and you were his, then you two would be making a go of a relationship, not playing the cat and mouse game. You two are sexually attracted to eachother and he isn't ready to commit to anything OUTSIDE of the bedroom.
Nemo Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 You two are sexually attracted to eachother and he isn't ready to commit to anything OUTSIDE of the bedroom. Agreed. Start by doing it in the kitchen, and work outwards from there.
Trialbyfire Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 jojo, chemistry is a funny thing, in that it can happen at the oddest of times. Don't mistake chemistry for a potential life partnership. You'll find that soulmates don't exist. What you will also find is that there's more than one person who's compatible, although it takes awhile to find them. Someone who honestly cares about you, wouldn't treat you in this cavalier fashion. Don't get stuck on someone who isn't able to give it his all or in reality, much.
Rooster_DAR Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 jojo, chemistry is a funny thing, in that it can happen at the oddest of times. Don't mistake chemistry for a potential life partnership. You'll find that soulmates don't exist. What you will also find is that there's more than one person who's compatible, although it takes awhile to find them. Someone who honestly cares about you, wouldn't treat you in this cavalier fashion. Don't get stuck on someone who isn't able to give it his all or in reality, much. Awesome advice!
Nemo Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 You'll find that soulmate Yes, very true. Just keep looking. It will definitely happen.
Author jojo88 Posted January 6, 2008 Author Posted January 6, 2008 thanks for all your views but i know he's the one for me. i will back off completely and when we meet i'll be his friend and not flirt or anything. theres a party at weekend and were both going to be there so opportunity to see if i can act with my brain for a bit and see what happens. I'm not playing games but i feel men really need to pursue the chase and this guy is def one for that. thank you guys anyway!!
THE THRONE Posted January 6, 2008 Posted January 6, 2008 thanks for all your views but i know he's the one for me. i will back off completely and when we meet i'll be his friend and not flirt or anything. theres a party at weekend and were both going to be there so opportunity to see if i can act with my brain for a bit and see what happens. I'm not playing games but i feel men really need to pursue the chase and this guy is def one for that. thank you guys anyway!! Ok everyone, she wants to remain blind to the handwritting on the wall and has basically told us that we're full of it and he's the one. She is playing games and she likes attention. Someone please close this thread.
GIVIN IT TO YOU STR8 Posted January 6, 2008 Posted January 6, 2008 Yeah throw yourself at his feet and offer to hand him your soul! You got played, accept it!
Kamille Posted January 7, 2008 Posted January 7, 2008 Ok, I'll try again. Here is something I know now that I wish I knew in my teens and early twenties: the less you focus on a guy, the more options you keep open, the more likely you are to meet and attract men who will prove to be highly compatible. And the more fun dating is. So, sure, keep your soulmate in your options, but don't make him your only option, ok? (Especially since he has clearly showed that he might be a waste of time). You might be suprised to find that you get along even more wonderfully with someone who is ready to treat you like gold.
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