lichelle311 Posted June 14, 2003 Posted June 14, 2003 This isn't your typical situation, it all started out when this guy and I met about 8 years ago,when we were 12 years old, we both like each other, but it didn't become anything at first. About 3 or four years later when we were about 15 we started to like each other more, but didn't let the other know. Plus we were each dealing with someone else, but we would always stare at each other. I was blamed for something and everyone got mad at me but him, he was the only one on my side and it turned out that all accusations against me were false. Fast forward were were both 18 and about to graduate high school I had been disappointed by this other guy ( he turned me down) and (Jay) <------ the 1 I have been talking about had broken up with a girlfriend. Jay told me I was to good for the other guy and that there were plenty of other guys who wanted me. 2 weeks later he tells me that He has liked me since we were about 15, I was shocked! He asked me how I felt and I told him that I felt the same way. That was how it started. He would come to my old job and wait for me since I closed up at 12 midnight, this being after he finished a full day of work himself. We didn't have sex, I didn't even let him kiss me, then I found out that he had a girl on the side and confronted him, he admitted it. I didn't speak to him for about four months. It was during these four months that I found out he broke up with this girl. ( I to this day still believe she didn't exist) We spoke again after four months and started chilling together but only in groups never alone. He then told me he was going into the Air Force, I was sad, but what could I do? He left and for eight months we had no kind of contact. The only way I found out anything about him was through my mom who was still in contact with his mom. ( they want us together) He would speak to my mom through his mom but didn't want me to know. This went on for eight months and then out of the blue he calls me for the first time last week to tell me where he has been ( I knew but he didn't know that) and that he has to go overseas for 2 years and that he wanted to see me. I was shocked first of all that he called me and proceeded to ask him why he did call me, first he said that I was a good friend. I asked him again and he said I was a good friend , important to him, and he wants to keep in contact. We haven't gotten together, something always prevents us from meeting or seeing each other . I miss him so much it hurts & I am not even sure about how he feels about me!!! Do any of you who read this think he has any type of feelings for me and am I wasting my time? He 's leaving in 2 wks!!! Please reply back and tell me what you think of the whole situation!!!!!!! Is there a chance etc ........... Thanx in advance ! Lichelle
clia Posted June 14, 2003 Posted June 14, 2003 I think if he calls you and wants to see you while he is home, then you should go. If not, then you really need to get over this. He is 20 years old, and fully capable of keeping in constant touch with you if you are important to him. Even if he is overseas, he can send you e-mails, call you (occasionally), write letters, or even relay messages to you through his mother if it comes to that. I just tend to think that this guy has had 8 years to make a move, and he has not done so in any substantial way. I don't care if he said he "liked" you. So what? Actions speak louder than words. Sure, he showed up at your work late at night, but he never asked you out on a date, did he? Well if he liked you so much, why not? You sound like you were open to it, and I don't get the impression that you were sending off any weird vibes that would scare him off. I'd say if he contacts you and wants to see you, you might have a chance. If he doesn't, then he is not interested. I mean, think about this--if he is home for two weeks, wouldn't he want to see the girl he has feelings for? I hope this works out for you...
Tony T Posted June 14, 2003 Posted June 14, 2003 It's really up to him to tell you how he feels, it's not up to us to guess. However, he's going to be out of the country for TWO years. That's a long time. Feelings change. People change. I don't think it would be a practical thing for you to wait two years just to see where this may go. So it doesn't make any difference how he feels...makes no difference at all. You should try to resolve this before he leaves. See what he thinks and feels. But that's where it's got to stop. There is really no point in you sitting at home night after night for two years while he's away for something you have no idea will be right for you in the long run.
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