shoesies05 Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Has anyone ever dated a person that has a **** load of money, but then doesn't really themselves? If so- does it effect the relationship in any way? thanks
Jilly Bean Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Doesn't what themselves? That was like an interesting madlib...
SeraBella Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 it depends on the people involved, in my opinion. from my experience, some men seem to want to sort of "save you" and spoil you with material things/create a dependency. it can eventually hurt the relationship if the woman is not really wanting to "be saved" and wants to be independent. some men act like they are above the woman and treat her mostly as property. sometimes it has no effect whatsoever if you don't allow money to be a concern in the relationship. sometimes it can make the one with not so much money harbor resentment/jealousy. sometimes it can make the one with no so much money expect more from the one with money...gifts, trips, dinners, etc. and sometimes the one with money will love to splurge, but not always. some people with money are incredibly frugal. an ex of mine never paid for ANYTHING but made 4 times my salary. i was financially stable, and earning a decent salary, but the average i dated were never even like that. it made me so mad and bitter towards him. but regardless of how much money a person has, i can't handle people being cheap. it can be intimidating when it comes to times when you want to give the person with money a gift and you may not have much money...then you think it's not good enough, etc. but i think it's all a matter of if you let it have an effect on the relationship, it will. if you act like it's a non-issue, it doesn't seem to be as big of a deal. as with any relationship, handle it with maturity and you'll have better luck.
Krytie TV Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Has anyone ever dated a person that has a **** load of money, but then doesn't really themselves? If so- does it effect the relationship in any way? Yes I have and yes it does. What really matters though is how that person approaches the discrepancy.
THE THRONE Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Been there dne that. My ex was LOADED with dough. She never tossed it in my face that she made more than I did, and the plan was for me to be "Mr. Mom" while she worked. The problem is she was a workaholic, and work always came first. I was put on the back burner and now she is my ex. She said some very interesting thins that I'll share with you if you want because they may give you some insight on what you may experience.
Krytie TV Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Been there dne that. My ex was LOADED with dough. She never tossed it in my face that she made more than I did, and the plan was for me to be "Mr. Mom" while she worked. The problem is she was a workaholic, and work always came first. I was put on the back burner and now she is my ex. She said some very interesting thins that I'll share with you if you want because they may give you some insight on what you may experience. I found this to be the case too. Typically (not always) people who make a lot of money do so at the expense on interpersonal relationship functioning. The problem I had was she was stingey with her money and seemed to have hypocritical views on how we should contribute to the relationship... little things that in isolation are not a big deal, but when put together, speak loudly (e.g., had no problem letting me drive everywhere in my car, but when we needed to take her car she sometimes wanted gas money... that kinda thing). Mostly though, I believe it to be an indicator that the person will not have a lot of free time for the person they're with.
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