IFeelNieve Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 I wanna start out by saying i am not sure how i feel right now naive, happy or wrong, I have been in a relationship for the past 10 months with my now ex-girlfriend and i think i just ended it for good this time on new years eve 3 days ago, When i first saw her was when i was working she came in to get her friend (my co-worker) for lunch. We got introduced and i got her number we talked over the phone a few times and then ended up meeting at a bar for a drink maybe a week later i at first felt ackward cause this is the first time i actually was meeting her to hang out and actually going out on a real date since my last ex-girlfriend which was 4 months before that i felt after the first 10 seconds we hit it off great everything was good i could make her laugh and we talked at the bar for like over 4 hours and the end of the night we were going to say goodbye and everything and i am not sure because i was drunk or what i asked if she wanted to come over and she said yes. We go back to my place and chill and everything was great next day i had to work so we woke up and went our seperate ways. I give her a call later that day and we talk for almost my entire lunch break and she then mentions to me that she is with somebody and that she has been trying to break it off, My first words were you should have told me from the beginning and that she needs to be honest with him and tell him what happened and that if she does not wanna be in that relationship anymore she needs to end it (My first Sign). she says ok and we hang up calls me later that night and said she told him everything and she ended it with him. So as that week goes on she starts coming over to my house more and more often, One night here phone just keeps ringing and she finally turns it off later she turns it back on and listens to her message i was a good ways away watching t.v. and i could her this person screaming on the phone calling her a lying this whore that and i think this is my mistake cause i got so into her that i did not ask anything about it but had a good feeling she never told her ex-boyfriend anything about us and that he just found out somehow, Anyways i am now going to start highlighting our relationship on what i feel are given signs i should have seen but was so caught up into her that i just let pass by and this is why i feel so upset with myself. There has been a few times i have called her up and asked if she wants to come over for a movie and eat dinner she has said yes and she only lives like 5 minutes from me currently she still lives with her parents at age 24 i also just had to move back in with my parents at age 22 after having my own place for like 3 years during college, But anyways i would give her a call 1 hour later wondering whats going on and where she is and she would not pick up but call me back like 5 minutes later saying she fell asleep and would be leaving in a minute another hour has gone by and she is still not here call again and she says she had a friend call and wanted to go out with her so i get a little upset and say you could have tolded me earlier and not leave me hanging wondering what is going on and then i hear her friend in the background saying you finally calling him back which makes me thinks she was there the entire time and had no intentions of coming over.. There was a time like 2 months after we started dating she was always at my house and eventually i started noticing she was either at my house or at work and would call me right after work to come over and she would stay all night and do the same for like 1 month straight like i said i live with my parents and its kind of hard to explain that her suitcase in my closet is just some stuff she brought over for the next morning she was pretty much living with me after only knowing her for like 2 months which i find kind of odd(maybe just me). and i finally told her she cant come over one night because i am going out to see my friends that night she tells me she cant go home because her parents are mad at her for not sleeping at home i guess a very strict family but she is 24 almost 25 and pays the rent and most of the bills both hers and her parents. so i end up not going out with my friends how i have been unable to see since i first started seeing her because she never would want me to go out with my friends. eventually i had to tell her she cant stay at my house anymore and she gets upset and almost break up so i try to make it work we start staying at hotels every night for like 2 weeks straight on my dime and i could not afford it anymore so i say you have to go and she tells me 2 days before she leaves that she bought a airplane ticket and will b leaving in 2 days to go visit her country for 3 weeks at this point i was actually happy and yet upset she did not tell me this till 2 days before she leaves. i ask how she got the money cause she was living off what i make and what little she made. she tells me her friend gave her money which brings me to another point My ex-girlfriend has this friend who is over 60 years old and he gives her this little job at his shop as receptions she says she knows him well that he gives her a credit card, bought her a expensive camera, 150$ bottle of perfume and payed for her airplane ticket which costed over $1000 and every time she needs money he gives her $500 and she says ask for nothing in return and come to find out that his wife does not like my ex cause she found out one time how much he gives her, Plus my ex treats him like **** he calls her all the time to come into the shop to work and cover times he needs to go out and run errands and she never picks up and she talks bad to him, My first thought when i heard all this i was like she is gold digging this man and has to be doing something for him to make him give her so much this is why i feel naive cause we broke up for a few days cause i could not understand how someone could do so much she tells me i dont trust her and that i dont understand and i felt bad so i take her back and make her promise nothing else is going on with him Another time we were at my house she had her email open on my computer and went to take a shower so i jumped on my computer to check mine and see her's i come to find out she had been on one of those dating sites and had been emailing somone from there and then i find a private email from the guy she been talking to and said he had a great time last night and that she is a wonderful person(so many signs). I thought about it as she was taking a shower that she told me her and one of her female friends from work went to eat and she came to my house later that night she never mentioned anything about being on a single site and not a free one she actually paid for it and meet someone for dinner, I had the feeling she went alone to this thing and meet him and i was mad we broke up for awhile and she would call me 100 times aday for a week straight i would never pick up but i went out one time and was a little drunk and picked up and we ended up making up and she promised nothing happened and that she was only on there looking for friends..(i really am blind) and then not 2 days later from getting back together she goes out and has a drink with him and she calls me before she goes and leaves me a message saying what she is going to do..(i am so dumb) and then there was another time she went out with her friends and comes to my house later that night after being out, she tells me the next day that she saw her ex-boyfriend there and he wanted to be with her and if she said she told him no..i find her email again and she wrote him a message saying why were you so mean to me the other night i was trying to be with you and make you happy but you kept telling me no(i am desperate)..i never could say anything cause i was suspiciouses about her that i hacked her email to read it i know i know im just as bad as her..but i always kept that inside and it hurt me so bad i use to never be like this its almost seems as if i was so desperate for something that anything could happen and i would take her back.. also there was another email from a diffrent guy she also told me she meet this other guy cause her friends car broke down that he gave them a jump but he worked at some club and he would get them in for free so she said she needed his number so she could call when they wanted in.. So after all this he starts calling everyday and then text messages started and then i found an email from her to him saying she thought something was there but i guess not cause he was a jerk to her 1 night i did not even know they went out together... I am going to stop now cause there are many more i can list and go into detail about but it hurts, how could i have been so miss treated for the past year by someone who looked me in my eyes so many times and told me she loved me and that i was the only one for her and we came so close to having a child at 1 time...WOW writing this all down makes me feel really good now i was sitting at my computer listening to some sad songs and browsing the internet looking for answers as to why i feel like this and came to this site and jus start typing my guts out...i know i have done some bad things in there but i needed to get this out and let someone know i still feel bad maybe not for her but the touch.....please leave me comments saying what u think if u think i was wrong say it i jus need to know if i was abused or just dumb
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