Lucky555 Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 what are some behaviors that constitute as being needy? I have been reading posts and i have come to the conclusion that when dating relationships end because someone is being needy?
phoensam Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I have my own view on this...relationships end and people use the excuse that someone is being needy...what it really translates to is "i now find you annoying to be around, don't want to be around you too much, but if you want to keep it casual, i'll keep you around til i find something better". If you really like someone, you love spending time together and try your best to meet your partner's "needs" without complaining.
Lishy Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 That is true! If you love someone you would not see them as needy, you would see yourself as helping them out. It is only when you lose the love a bit that you see them as needy and boot em out!
Green Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I have my own view on this...relationships end and people use the excuse that someone is being needy...what it really translates to is "i now find you annoying to be around, don't want to be around you too much, but if you want to keep it casual, i'll keep you around til i find something better". If you really like someone, you love spending time together and try your best to meet your partner's "needs" without complaining. this is a good point. So the easiest way to not annoy some one with things they'd classify as needy would be, to respect peoples privacy and seperate lives from the one they have dating you. Other then that don't annoy the person your dating to much, at least not in the begining or it will be over.
Jordane Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 People's definitions of needy are individual based. Some see needy as simply wanting to see them often whereas others might see needy as sitting on the couch and asking them to do everything for you. It varies and depends on the tolerance of the person you're with.
Dynamo Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Theres different types of needy - emotional-needy where they need you there to constantly reassure them you still love them and stroke their ego. There is physical-needy where they require that you buy them lots of stuff (stay away from these superficial people..). There is personal-needy, where they feel a need to move into your place, re-arrange everything, put all their stuff in the bathroom, etc etc etc. So there are a lot of different types of "needy". It's hard to pinpoint one definition. The point phoensam brought up is very important too, though!
phoensam Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 this is a good point. So the easiest way to not annoy some one with things they'd classify as needy would be, to respect peoples privacy and seperate lives from the one they have dating you. Other then that don't annoy the person your dating to much, at least not in the begining or it will be over. I agree, with a big but.... But, sometimes people fall madly & passionately for one another from day one, and can barely stand spending a minute apart and they don't care about needing privacy etc. But clearly if only one person is feeling this, and showing it, they will come across as a stalker, or maybe just "needy"!! There have been guys where I have loved that they want to spend every minute with me at the beginning, and guys that I have found just plain creepy for trying to do it. How I view that behaviour, seems to depend on how much I like them. And I don't mean to say that there aren't lots of people who enjoy lots of alone/private time...I'm one of them. But that can be worked out a bit later down the line...if it starts out as a passoinate relationship, I'm not really thinking about my need for private time in the early days of thatrelationship. Unfortunately not all relationships fall into the passionate from the beginning category though and that's where you must tread lightly and not make the person feel like you are kind of stalking them...lol.
Green Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 well in a situation where some one wanted to be with you all the time, then there would be no need to respect their privacy, but holding hands in the bathroom for 1 or 2 could be anoying
phoensam Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 well in a situation where some one wanted to be with you all the time, then there would be no need to respect their privacy, but holding hands in the bathroom for 1 or 2 could be anoying I don't think I'd be happy with the holding hands in the bathroom thing, no matter how passionate...lol. That's where I'd be thinking "crazy stalker, call 911"!..lol.
Author Lucky555 Posted January 4, 2008 Author Posted January 4, 2008 So needy depends on the the person who you are with, as in if they find you needy. I guess i could agree with this, there are some people who require lots of space and time for themselves while there are others that need to be with that person a lot of the time. Thanks for the replies I have a better interpretation of this.
Jilly Bean Posted January 4, 2008 Posted January 4, 2008 Lucky, I have dated very independent men, who think ANYONE is needy (including their dog - lol), and guys who are more needy who would never make that complaint, because they know they are as well. But I think it depends on the person AND the situation. One guy could find you needy and another not at all.
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