Pitbull4 Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I have been with my fiancee' for 9 yrs...engaged for 1. He is a wonderful man who meets all of my needs...mental, physical, spirtual, emotional.....NOT financial. He can not seem to hold down a job....futhermore...he has a criminal past, which I am fully aware of and have decided to stick by him through...nothing serious...that prevents him from ever getting a good job. I am a firm believer that money means nothing in love, however, there are some things I would like to have in life.....including a stable financial future. Any advise on how to get him motivated to get a job? I don't care if he works at McDonalds for the rest of his life, as long as he sticks with something!!!
GangstaGrillz Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 As a guy who had a criminal past know how it is not to get a good job. But it's trade schools out here that will pick him up. Did you explain to him about the things that you want out of life. Just let him know that he has to pull it together for the both of you, and maybe yall children, if the two of you decide to have them.
Author Pitbull4 Posted January 3, 2008 Author Posted January 3, 2008 I have spoken with him about how he needs to do this for us and our future children....he always says " I know", but he just doesn't seem too motivated. What makes a guy motivated to take care of his family? Should I leave and hope it scares him into doing something? I hate to play games!! How long do I wait?
Ronni_W Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Any advise on how to get him motivated to get a job? I don't care if he works at McDonalds for the rest of his life, Honestly, putting out a message that sounds like, "I don't care if you work at McDonald's for the rest of your life," is the opposite of being motivating or inspiring. (You don't have to be using those exact words out loud to him.) You could, instead, ask what he'd like to do for the next 5 or 10 years, and offer support and encouragement if he needs to get re-trained. Also, what does he believe is his responsibility around making a significant financial contribution to the household? -- Is he willing to just use his past mistake(s) as the excuse to not be successful in the future?
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