GooGooDoll Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I have been seeing this girl I met through a friend for about 6 weeks now, about 6 dates. Since I wasnt sure exactly what our status was as it never got physical, I had the conversation with her the other day as to what was going on. I got the "I like you as a friend, and right now I dont think Im ready for a relationship since Im concentrating on finding a job." (She just got laid off) Regardless, that part is fine. We'll be friends and Im not looking into pursuing anything further. What I am a little confused about is whether or not I should have seen this coming since my impression up to this point was a little different. When we were out she would often ask me things like "When are you going to cook for me?" as well as asking when we would go to particular restaurants or do certain activities. When a girl asks me to cook for her, I naturally assume that theres some level of interest since it's not something I normally do for just casual friends nor do I feel its something most guys would do. I would guess that it's the same for most people? Along the same lines she would let me pick up the check for dinners etc. (she did offer to pay but didnt give alot of resistance) More than anything it was the "cooking" thing, since it came up more than once in the context of "how come you havent invited me over for dinner yet etc etc" Im just trying to gather if other people would find this a little misleading or not, and consider it a learning experience.
ElvenPriestess Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I'd say if you guys had been friends for a really long time and were close friends, then it would be a normal thing. But at that point it would probably be more like "You keep saying you're an awesome cook, when are you going to prove it?" I think she should have been up front with you from the start about just looking for friendship. But now you know, so just take it for what it is. Let it be, and don't worry about what mixed signals there WERE. You know what IS and that's what counts.
Author GooGooDoll Posted January 3, 2008 Author Posted January 3, 2008 We just met. Yah I agree with just letting it go. It just happened like a day ago so I was a little irritated by the whole thing obv. Thanks tho.
ElvenPriestess Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 It's fresh, and it's good to get things out while they're fresh. Just don't forget with this that while she initiated the just friends thing, look out for you. You now decide if you're ok with that or not. If not, let it drop off. If so, then may you have a fabulous new friendship.
Author GooGooDoll Posted January 3, 2008 Author Posted January 3, 2008 Definitely. Decided to give it a few weeks to let it cool off some and then perhaps pursue the friendship thing. Easier to have some time / space in between.
EYECANDY000 Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 right now you should just focus on being friends and getting to know her further. right now she has other things on her mind like finding employment . I wouldn't look much into it with her asking to cook for you. she may just be joking, I say it all the time.! and don't mean anything by it 95% of the time
MadMissKelly Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I hate that! LOL, Just when you think its going to get good......they pull out the just friends thing. But in all honesty, I would say something like that to a guy who I was romantically interested in. Who knows though, because i think we all have done things that come off differently than we intend them to. I agree with the others that you should just let it go, but leave it in her control. If she wants to take it further then thats up to her. If youre still into her(both as a friend or gf) invite her out with a group of friends, maintain some contact. Who knows, you may end up with a really great friendship.
Author GooGooDoll Posted January 4, 2008 Author Posted January 4, 2008 Haha yah, not fun when things get stopped cold as you're getting comfortable. Appreciate all the advice, just gonna let it die down a bit and just be friends in a few weeks. Im fine with that. Thanks for the input on the situation.
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