Frances Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Why is it that in most cases with MM and OW that the age difference is usually quite considerable? The man in most cases that I know of is the older one. Is it because younger women are more likely to believe the usual lies that most of these men tell?
whichwayisup Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Is it because younger women are more likely to believe the usual lies that most of these men tell? Most of the OW who post here seem to have MM similar or close in age range, and the usual lies are still there and believed.
Author Frances Posted January 3, 2008 Author Posted January 3, 2008 Most of the OW who post here seem to have MM similar or close in age range, and the usual lies are still there and believed. It is sad then that women do not learn from experience in life.
Jilly Bean Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I would think because he has money, and because she is too inexperienced to know the consequences of an affair.
GreenEyedLady Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I am sure it is all of those reasons... *rolls eyes*
Chrome Barracuda Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Why is it that in most cases with MM and OW that the age difference is usually quite considerable? The man in most cases that I know of is the older one. Is it because younger women are more likely to believe the usual lies that most of these men tell? I think it lies within the woman, she may have certain father issues deeply inside her that she doesnt know about. I mean look at goldiggers. they use a man for his money, he calls her princess, he buys her things, she calls him daddy. And then he sleeps with her??? WTF??? I dont know what's going on but both of these people need to grow up and be adults.
White Flower Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Why is it that in most cases with MM and OW that the age difference is usually quite considerable? The man in most cases that I know of is the older one. Is it because younger women are more likely to believe the usual lies that most of these men tell? I hope you're asking out of true curiosity; if so, I'll answer. It is called the May-December relationship. First of all, women mature faster than men. Unfortunately, we get tired of the men our age (who don't even act their age) and want for someone more intelligent and experienced. It has nothing to do with money at all, at least for me it doesn't. And if we haven't been treated well by a man our own age and an older gentleman comes up and acts like Prince Charming it is like a tall drink of water. For men, I've read that they seek to relive their youth and try to correct something they went through when they were their OW's age, usually emotionally. The older MM goes through a lot to understand his wife's sexual needs and he becomes a master at knowing how to please her. Then, when menopause hits, his mastery means nothing. Well, it doesn't, but he feels that way and looks to use that well developed talent elsewhere. Not immediately, of course. In fact, it can take many years for him to cave in and start an A. If one takes all the hateful inuendos out of this scenario, it becomes quite practical and even understandable. He doesn't mean to fall in love with the OW, but it happens. She falls in love sometimes as well. The lies? Well, sometimes lies are told and other times the truth is told. It is up to the individual to sort through it all and figure it out. I don't think it's fair to say that all MM lie or lie all the time or are usual about it. Overall, it is a very complimentary relationship agewise.
OWoman Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 I hope you're asking out of true curiosity; if so, I'll answer. It is called the May-December relationship. First of all, women mature faster than men. Unfortunately, we get tired of the men our age (who don't even act their age) and want for someone more intelligent and experienced. It has nothing to do with money at all, at least for me it doesn't. And if we haven't been treated well by a man our own age and an older gentleman comes up and acts like Prince Charming it is like a tall drink of water. For men, I've read that they seek to relive their youth and try to correct something they went through when they were their OW's age, usually emotionally. The older MM goes through a lot to understand his wife's sexual needs and he becomes a master at knowing how to please her. Then, when menopause hits, his mastery means nothing. Well, it doesn't, but he feels that way and looks to use that well developed talent elsewhere. Not immediately, of course. In fact, it can take many years for him to cave in and start an A. If one takes all the hateful inuendos out of this scenario, it becomes quite practical and even understandable. He doesn't mean to fall in love with the OW, but it happens. She falls in love sometimes as well. The lies? Well, sometimes lies are told and other times the truth is told. It is up to the individual to sort through it all and figure it out. I don't think it's fair to say that all MM lie or lie all the time or are usual about it. Overall, it is a very complimentary relationship agewise. Agree WF! Frances, the reason women are attracted to older men is biological. There's heaps of literature on this - look it up on Google if you're interested - and it's been shown that it's natural for men to want younger women (looking for fertility, to spread their genes) and women to want older men (looking for security / protection to raise their children to adulthood in safety). We're programmed that way. That doesn't mean all women, or all men, follow it slavishly, but it is a trend and it is natural and it's so "normal" it hardly warrants comment. I've always been attracted to the same age group whether in MM or SG, so not sure why you've focused specifically on MM and OW? My MMs are in the same age range all of my SOs have ever been, the same gap since I was a kid. It has nothing to do with "lies", and everything to do with attraction.
White Flower Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Hope I don't appear to take over this thread, but OWoman, I'll ask you this question and everyone can certainly chime in. Have you been with someone your own age and if so do you find the older men to be better lovers? To be fair, I'll say my H wasn't too shabby. But to be honest, my older guy is far superior in every way. A friend of mine who is in her mid-thirties prefers older guys and says that older men have more energy and experience. I understand where the experience comes from, but the energy thing is more curious. I suppose they need less sleep due to their age; therefore, spend more time cuddling and holding?
OWoman Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 Hope I don't appear to take over this thread, but OWoman, I'll ask you this question and everyone can certainly chime in. Have you been with someone your own age and if so do you find the older men to be better lovers? I'm not sure the numbers involved make this a representative sample but yes, I have had the misfortune of sampling men my own age-ish, at various stages of my life, and have always been instantly reminded Why It's A Bad Idea. Emotional maturity, sexual maturity, everything is just so completely out of synch. It's like being with a vibrator - except there's probably more chance of deep and meaningful with a vibrator! A friend of mine who is in her mid-thirties prefers older guys and says that older men have more energy and experience. I understand where the experience comes from, but the energy thing is more curious. I suppose they need less sleep due to their age; therefore, spend more time cuddling and holding? Not just that, but they last longer - because they take longer themselves to reach orgasm. Which is great if you enjoy sex and want to prolong it. And while there's longer "down time" (so to speak) between sessions, they use that time well making sure your needs are well attended to, so that by the time they're ready for the next bout, you just can't get enough! And unlike younger men who need to sleep it off each time, older guys know how to pace themselves so they can keep at it all night... and all next day.... and all next night... stopping only for meals (if you let them!)
imstunned Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 bucking the trend again, my exmm was 8 years younger than me - he was 26 when I met him, I was 34. I'd take a younger guy over an older guy any day - it was the older man who I had a fling with in my 20's (he was 41) who didnt have the stamina- my young exmm - total dynamite.
GreenEyedLady Posted January 3, 2008 Posted January 3, 2008 All my previous lovers were around my age but my MM is older than me...And the sex is the most amazing I've ever had, but I attribute that more to our connections on every level and not age...
White Flower Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 All my previous lovers were around my age but my MM is older than me...And the sex is the most amazing I've ever had, but I attribute that more to our connections on every level and not age... That connection is definitely a factor in the amazing sex. Even still, he is impressive physically and I was quite surprised by it.
White Flower Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 I'm not sure the numbers involved make this a representative sample but yes, I have had the misfortune of sampling men my own age-ish, at various stages of my life, and have always been instantly reminded Why It's A Bad Idea. Emotional maturity, sexual maturity, everything is just so completely out of synch. It's like being with a vibrator - except there's probably more chance of deep and meaningful with a vibrator! Not just that, but they last longer - because they take longer themselves to reach orgasm. Which is great if you enjoy sex and want to prolong it. And while there's longer "down time" (so to speak) between sessions, they use that time well making sure your needs are well attended to, so that by the time they're ready for the next bout, you just can't get enough! And unlike younger men who need to sleep it off each time, older guys know how to pace themselves so they can keep at it all night... and all next day.... and all next night... stopping only for meals (if you let them!) You are quite funny, OW! And thanks for your honest and experienced reply:) Makes me wanna only look at older men from now on...
PoshPrincess Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 I was seeing a much older guy when I was in my early 20s and the appeal for me was definitely the fact that he was more mature than guys my own age and knew how to treat a girl! You could actually have adult conversations rather than sit their listening to them showing off in front of their mates. When going out with 'boys', as they were, I was lucky if I got taken anywhere other than the local pub and for a bag of chips after. If we did go out for dinner it was on my suggestion and I usually ended up paying! My older man didn't buy me presents or anything like that (more's the pity ) but he did take me out for nice meals, saw I got home ok, etc, just general things that you would expect from a R really. For the older man seeing a younger woman, I think the appeal is usually the ego boost and the eye-candy factor!
Lyssa Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 I hope you're asking out of true curiosity; if so, I'll answer. It is called the May-December relationship. First of all, women mature faster than men. Unfortunately, we get tired of the men our age (who don't even act their age) and want for someone more intelligent and experienced. It has nothing to do with money at all, at least for me it doesn't. And if we haven't been treated well by a man our own age and an older gentleman comes up and acts like Prince Charming it is like a tall drink of water. For men, I've read that they seek to relive their youth and try to correct something they went through when they were their OW's age, usually emotionally. The older MM goes through a lot to understand his wife's sexual needs and he becomes a master at knowing how to please her. Then, when menopause hits, his mastery means nothing. Well, it doesn't, but he feels that way and looks to use that well developed talent elsewhere. Not immediately, of course. In fact, it can take many years for him to cave in and start an A. If one takes all the hateful inuendos out of this scenario, it becomes quite practical and even understandable. He doesn't mean to fall in love with the OW, but it happens. She falls in love sometimes as well. The lies? Well, sometimes lies are told and other times the truth is told. It is up to the individual to sort through it all and figure it out. I don't think it's fair to say that all MM lie or lie all the time or are usual about it. Overall, it is a very complimentary relationship agewise. Right on, WF!
OpenBook Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 I don't think it's fair to say that all MM lie or lie all the time or are usual about it. Oh, they all lie, honey. (Am I cynical much??) I've always been amazed at men's unlimited capacity to lie to women. They lie to women in order to get into their britches, get them to commit, or get rid of them. This applies to both SG's and MM's. ("There's a difference between lying, and lying to your W.") The older ones have really mastered the art to where what they say is nebulous enough to slither out of it later if they have to. That being said, the times they are a-changing, and we're beginning to see the genders switched in the May-December relationship, to where the woman is older than the man.
marlena Posted January 5, 2008 Posted January 5, 2008 Yes, definitely a trend in my part of the world. Women are tired of middle- aged men's ED problems, their flabby bodiesand eternal med problems. More and more, they opt for younger, virile guys whom they can have great sex with and do energetic things with. Having a boyfriend many years younger rejuvenates them and makes them feel very sexy! It also flatters their ego ..just as men have been fluffing up their egos with younger women for ages. Yes, the times are def a-changing!
White Flower Posted January 6, 2008 Posted January 6, 2008 Oh, they all lie, honey. (Am I cynical much??) I've always been amazed at men's unlimited capacity to lie to women. They lie to women in order to get into their britches, get them to commit, or get rid of them. This applies to both SG's and MM's. ("There's a difference between lying, and lying to your W.") The older ones have really mastered the art to where what they say is nebulous enough to slither out of it later if they have to. That being said, the times they are a-changing, and we're beginning to see the genders switched in the May-December relationship, to where the woman is older than the man. Yeah, you're cynical all right, but I see your point. I do believe there can be lies told in order to get something in return; however, I also feel that each man is different. Each goal is different. Each circumstance is different. Then there are the times when I hear that Fleetwood Mac song in the back of my mind, Tell me lies, tell me sweet little lies... I know I cannot question everything and that is usually when I hear this song.
silktricks Posted January 6, 2008 Posted January 6, 2008 I've always been amazed at men's unlimited capacity to lie to women. I've always been amazed at women's unlimited capacity to lie to women as well.... not to mention women's unlimited capacity to lie to men... oh yes, and to lie to themselves . Men don't have any kind of lock on lying - not by a looonnnngggg shot.
OpenBook Posted January 6, 2008 Posted January 6, 2008 I've always been amazed at women's unlimited capacity to lie to women as well. This has not been my experience.
CAT100 Posted January 7, 2008 Posted January 7, 2008 My MM is 22 years older than me, and no, Im not a gold digger LOL I stayed with him when he was on the verge of bankruptcy. He doesnt exactly shower me with gifts either, and I do not benefit in any way financially from being with him. I think its a bit of a stereo type that younger women want older men to 'provide' and 'look after' them. I certainly look after him more than he looks after me in a lot of ways. The reason Im with him is not really age related, I dont have a track record of dating older guys etc, I wasnt particularly looking for someone over a certain age, lol! It was fairly simple- I met him, I fell in love with him. He is my first love, and this I think has made me more likely to stick with the situation, because I fell for him so hard. I dont really think about the age gap, he does, more than me- he thinks Im going to get chatted up by some younger guy & dump him. Ive tried over & over to explain that this wont happen, Ive been faithful to him for the whole 5.5 years of our relationship, and I would never cheat. If I wanted to cheat then Id realise I was with the wrong person, and I would end it. And I agree with a previous poster, older men are better in bed! He is the best lover Ive had by FAR & although Im the younger partner, he tires me out! LOL!
White Flower Posted January 8, 2008 Posted January 8, 2008 I would end it. And I agree with a previous poster, older men are better in bed! He is the best lover Ive had by FAR & although Im the younger partner, he tires me out! LOL! Doesn't it just blow your mind? Sometimes I go home and just want to crash out, lol. It's certainly not the wham, bam, thank ya ma'am, roll over and pass out sex I got from my H for over 20 years...
OWoman Posted January 8, 2008 Posted January 8, 2008 the wham, bam, thank ya ma'am, roll over and pass out sex I got from my H for over 20 years... That ought to be a capital crime! Bad sex for 20 years??? WF, how have you survived?
Lyssa Posted January 8, 2008 Posted January 8, 2008 Age has never been a problem for me. In the beginning when I found out his was as the same age as one of my brothers, it felt weird but it turned out well. He's just 8 years older so not a big deal for me. I'm definitely not in it with him because of his money, I make tonnes as well. It's all about how he treats me and how he is with my family. How supportive he has been with me with all the things I have gone through.
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