dkny27 Posted December 28, 2007 Posted December 28, 2007 Today was one of the hardest days in my life. I had to break up with the love of my life. I found out today that my boyfriend has been lying to me and shooting herion without me knowing for over 2 months now and i have lived with him for the last month and didn't even notice. I saw some texts on his phone and knew he was up to no good. It's the worst feeling in thte world. we had a tough day and he admitted to me that he had stolen $200 from me along with being sneaky and the lies. I have been hurt badly in the past. I had to put my foot down and kick him out of my house. i can't trust him anymore. He has nowhere to go and I feel horrible, but he had me drop him off at the train station. It was the hardest thing I had to do because I really do love him so much, but I know deep in my heart that I have to watch out for myself and that I was doing the right thing. He gave me a hug and said he was sorry and asked if this was the end of us, and I said yes, because I don't trust you and without trust there is nothing, and he walked away and I drove away. Now I am home and sad but I know i made the right decision. I called his mom to let her know and they were so nice to me. I felt horrible but i didn't want her to worry if he didn't call her back. She said I did the right thing as well. But it still hurts so much.
Stubborn Posted December 28, 2007 Posted December 28, 2007 I know you did the right thing.. good for you! It takes such a strong woman to do that.
sumdude Posted December 28, 2007 Posted December 28, 2007 Too bad this had to happen... I had a long term freind. He was my best freind for a years but eventually the addiction destroyed him and our freindship. The lies became so huge and the trust was just gone. I had to let him go... tough love they call it. There was nothing left I could do for him. Sadly I've been on the other side to a point... I was in a depression and having a bad couple of years. I let my drinking get serious.. though I was never mean, unfaithful or untruthful it was one major factor that killed my marriage.. In the end though... she broke the trust with me. You did what you had to do and it what's best for both of you. Hopefully this might shock him enough to change his behavior for his own good. Be good to yourself...
sedgwick Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 Oh, god, I am SO SORRY for you! I dated a heroin addict when I was 19 and it was horrible. I also recently cut ties with a close friend who started using again and lied about it. I don't know what to say except YES, you did the right thing. He'd never clean up if you stuck around. Now it's up to him to get clean or find another way to support his addiction. Maybe he'll see what he's lost and it will inspire him to get sober. My heart goes out to you. You did a hard thing and you were very brave and true to your principles. I hope there's at least a part of you that can be proud of yourself in the midst of the sorrow.
Kamille Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 Not only did you do the right thing for yourself, but by calling his parents, you also did right by him. I'm sorry you are going through this but is sounds like you have a good head on your shoulder and a lot of courage to go along with it. ((hug))
polywog Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 Everyone has said what I'd say.... but I just want to add my support. It sucks that your heart aches, just want to say (((HUGs))) to you. You did the right thing, and that was brave.
Author dkny27 Posted December 29, 2007 Author Posted December 29, 2007 He called me twice yesterday, once to see if I called his parents because they won't let him back to their house. I answered the phone and he tried to make me feel guilty, but all i said was he needed to get help. The second time I didn't pick it up and it was him crying, saying he was homeless, and had no place to go and was going to have to sleep in boston common or something. It broke my heart to hear it, but I didn't pick up the phone because if I had helped him, nothing will change. It's so hard though, cause I already miss him and wish he was here, but i can't sit here and aid him in bring high. Thank you all for your kind words. I don't really have anyone to talk to about this because I didn't want my friendsand family to know he does drugs. I would never hear the end of it. I have known people in my postion before and I always wondered why they stayed in their relationship or why the did what they did, so i guess now I know.
brothermartin Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 My heart gose out to you DKNY. Yeah, you did the best thing you could do for yourself and him. I don't know what to say other than I'm sorry for you, and I wish you the best.
Author dkny27 Posted January 2, 2008 Author Posted January 2, 2008 The story continues...he had to sleep in a hallway of a building for a night and the next night his mom picked him up because she didn't want him to be homeless. So now he claims he has hit rock bottom after loosing everything like that. He has been begging me to give him another chance and he promises he'll do anything to re-gain my trust. I am confused and hurt but I still love him so much. We met the other night and talked and are trying to work things out. I know everyone had said not to get involved with an addict. How do I know he's telling the truth?
Kamille Posted January 2, 2008 Posted January 2, 2008 The story continues...he had to sleep in a hallway of a building for a night and the next night his mom picked him up because she didn't want him to be homeless. So now he claims he has hit rock bottom after loosing everything like that. He has been begging me to give him another chance and he promises he'll do anything to re-gain my trust. I am confused and hurt but I still love him so much. We met the other night and talked and are trying to work things out. I know everyone had said not to get involved with an addict. How do I know he's telling the truth? I for one don't believe that love is something that one can choose the same way one shops for a computer. So, while his addiction is probably something that your friends and family would want to protect you from, he is as human as the rest of us and no doubt worthy of love. There is no way, however, that you can know he is telling the truth. Addiction is trickier then that, yet addiction can be conquered. You might want to look into support groups for friends and family of addicts, if you haven't already done so. But stay strong and take your time. You don't have to get back together until you feel that you can trust him again. And for that, you can need to take your time.
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