Author dreaming4ever Posted December 27, 2007 Author Posted December 27, 2007 Lizzie60, Yeah, I've heard of people that love being single. I guess I am just not one of them at all. I am extremely affectionate and well, hanging out with my cats is frankly not enough. Fish breath, ugh! lol......I just like absolutely LOVE kissing and all those girly high-on-love emotions and haven't felt like that in a while so yeah......boo! What does a girl have to do to get a kiss around here?? lol
Always Wrong Posted December 27, 2007 Posted December 27, 2007 I am aspiring to become more like you Lizzie60
Lizzie60 Posted December 27, 2007 Posted December 27, 2007 Lizzie60, Yeah, I've heard of people that love being single. I guess I am just not one of them at all. I am extremely affectionate and well, hanging out with my cats is frankly not enough. Fish breath, ugh! lol......I just like absolutely LOVE kissing and all those girly high-on-love emotions and haven't felt like that in a while so yeah......boo! What does a girl have to do to get a kiss around here?? lol Come on now... this is the easiest thing to do.. especially for a girl...
Author dreaming4ever Posted December 27, 2007 Author Posted December 27, 2007 lol sorry a virtual kiss just doesn't quite cut it. Thanks though
randuff Posted December 27, 2007 Posted December 27, 2007 Luckily I have an 8 year old son and a PS3 and a Wii now so I spend my free time gaming with my son. I sure to miss the intimate moments though and it is kinda hard to go "looking" for a girl being the single dad...
Jmina Posted December 27, 2007 Posted December 27, 2007 I would suggest that you actually dont try to fill your emptyness by the companionship of another. it is a clear sign of a bad pattern happening. it would end up in another breakup. you broke up with him because you have some soul searching to do. this is why breakups always happen. there is no other reason. either one or the other needs to do some healing and creating! you have been put on this singleton path now to get some strenghth and a GRIP on yourself. you wont find another yet because your path is to now go through some very lonely nights, until you get your act together and start creating yourself. you are one person, even in a relationship you are still your own person. if you cant be alone withyour self then the realtionship has no hope. it puts to much strain on the relationship and the other person. not many can last this. if you are lonely now, and go out and find a partner, that means he has just temporarily fixed your lonliness. then it would get to being that you are ONLY happy when you are with him. and when he isnt there youre missing him like crazy always wanting to text or ring him. this is the part of you that life has just given you a chance to fix. you have been given a chance to get some inner strength. so take care of yourself before finding a partner. do some self creating, get comfortable with being alone and enjoying your own company, it doesnt have to be all the time but you cant fix what your missing by getting it from others. it has to be from you. when you have gained these new lessons and have become stronger then i expect the person that you have been waiting for will most likely rock up. otherwise expect some more hard lessons life will throw you as many as you need before it sinks in. goodluck.keep posting, jmina
sumdude Posted December 27, 2007 Posted December 27, 2007 I would suggest that you actually dont try to fill your emptyness by the companionship of another. it is a clear sign of a bad pattern happening. it would end up in another breakup. you broke up with him because you have some soul searching to do. this is why breakups always happen. there is no other reason. either one or the other needs to do some healing and creating! you have been put on this singleton path now to get some strenghth and a GRIP on yourself. you wont find another yet because your path is to now go through some very lonely nights, until you get your act together and start creating yourself. you are one person, even in a relationship you are still your own person. if you cant be alone withyour self then the realtionship has no hope. it puts to much strain on the relationship and the other person. not many can last this. if you are lonely now, and go out and find a partner, that means he has just temporarily fixed your lonliness. then it would get to being that you are ONLY happy when you are with him. and when he isnt there youre missing him like crazy always wanting to text or ring him. this is the part of you that life has just given you a chance to fix. you have been given a chance to get some inner strength. so take care of yourself before finding a partner. do some self creating, get comfortable with being alone and enjoying your own company, it doesnt have to be all the time but you cant fix what your missing by getting it from others. it has to be from you. when you have gained these new lessons and have become stronger then i expect the person that you have been waiting for will most likely rock up. otherwise expect some more hard lessons life will throw you as many as you need before it sinks in. goodluck.keep posting, jmina Good post... This year is the first where I've pretty much lived alone. My ex wife left me last January.. I've learned how to be Ok by myself more. If I feel the need I'll call a friend on the phone, go out somewhere, visit my dad. Thing is right now I realize I still have some things to figure out about myself and my life. Some days I still miss the hell out of my ex life, it's hard to say if I miss her or more likely the life I had with her.. who knows any more. I've dated a little and find it a little hard to open up to it still. Which tells me there's some healing and growing to do. Point is to take this time to decide who you are from the inside out. Decide what you really want in your life and out of a relationship. You can't expect anyone or anything on the outside make you complete because then you'll always feel lacking... does that make sense? and yeah... some days I feel the same way... singledom does occasionally quite suck...
RichC Posted December 28, 2007 Posted December 28, 2007 Why don't you go where people are doing what you enjoy? Reading - join a book club. You get my point. I think you still have to flush the last relationship out of you before you can think about another one. Persue your interests. Relationships happen that way. If I am off tell me.
No Foolin Posted December 28, 2007 Posted December 28, 2007 For me being single is the only way to be. Yeah having a girl around full time is nice but then there's that whole "where are you going, what time are you going to be home" action. That is just "Not my style". Embrace these days, these are the times when identity is formed, strength is defined. Odds are you're going to be in a relationship again. Its like getting a cold (everyone gets them more than once). So, use these days to do what and who you want. No Foolin
KindAth86 Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 I think I'll have to echo what a number of insightful posters have said. It sounds to me like your loneliness has absolutely nothing to do with not having a boyfriend. It has everything to do with not having any close friends and not being around people. I know plenty of singles who are extremely busy and live very fulfilling lives. The ones that are miserable are the ones that don't have close relationships. I think that your depression would be lifted if you started forming strong friendships. DON'T start looking for a romantic encounter -- that will come in time. Go out and be with people. In order to do this, you'll HAVE to change your behaviors. You say that you prefer to exercise at home. Guess what? You can't do that anymore. Try joining a gym and meeting people there. Do what you love with other people. That's the only way to lift yourself out of this rut. If you want the way you're feeling to change, you MUST change your actions. You can't keep doing the same thing you've been doing and expect to somehow magically feel better, can you?
Gravedigger Posted December 29, 2007 Posted December 29, 2007 I would suggest that you actually dont try to fill your emptyness by the companionship of another. it is a clear sign of a bad pattern happening. it would end up in another breakup. you broke up with him because you have some soul searching to do. this is why breakups always happen. there is no other reason. either one or the other needs to do some healing and creating! you have been put on this singleton path now to get some strenghth and a GRIP on yourself. you wont find another yet because your path is to now go through some very lonely nights, until you get your act together and start creating yourself. you are one person, even in a relationship you are still your own person. if you cant be alone withyour self then the realtionship has no hope. it puts to much strain on the relationship and the other person. not many can last this. if you are lonely now, and go out and find a partner, that means he has just temporarily fixed your lonliness. then it would get to being that you are ONLY happy when you are with him. and when he isnt there youre missing him like crazy always wanting to text or ring him. this is the part of you that life has just given you a chance to fix. you have been given a chance to get some inner strength. so take care of yourself before finding a partner. do some self creating, get comfortable with being alone and enjoying your own company, it doesnt have to be all the time but you cant fix what your missing by getting it from others. it has to be from you. when you have gained these new lessons and have become stronger then i expect the person that you have been waiting for will most likely rock up. otherwise expect some more hard lessons life will throw you as many as you need before it sinks in. goodluck.keep posting, jmina jmina - that's just such a wonderful post. i think you pinpointed the exact way i feel right now. you have given me such a good reason not to contact my ex, asking how she is, and take some more time out to learn who i am. thanks !
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