Quinch Posted December 24, 2007 Posted December 24, 2007 While I was out at work this morning I got a hand delivered card from my former best friend. This is a guy I knew since we were 6 or 7 until a couple of years ago when we went our seperate ways. Apparently he now wants to pick up the friendship again but I'm not so sure. The guy is a loser who held me back for 20 years and I don't want to go back there. I have new friends now and I'm trying to build a new life for myself. I know this is the season of Goodwill to All Men but would I really be the bad guy if I just ignored him?
Elyssa Posted December 24, 2007 Posted December 24, 2007 I'd just ignore him. You obviously know what you want and what you need so the holiday season shouldn't make you feel forced to be friends with someone you obviously don't want to have any contact with. -E
jerbear Posted December 24, 2007 Posted December 24, 2007 If you don't want to then don't maintain contact. What does the card say and what are his true intentions? Maybe he has changed and for the better? I would not ignore him but meet and speak the truth and put it in realistic terms. 20 plus years and one can not be adults partaking in an adult conversation, is just wrong in my opinion. You can tell him that contact is no longer desired and you do not wish to "go back." Friends come and go but childhood friends (since age 6 / 7) is a long time. Even if both of you lost touch, I think your friend has had alot of influence in who you are today. Just saying your friend might deserve a short conversation before you ignore him.
sderenzi Posted December 24, 2007 Posted December 24, 2007 The guy is a loser who held me back for 20 years and I don't want to go back there. The words of someone that is weak Yes my friend you seem to think he held you back for 20 years when infact nothing that happened is his fault it's yours. I can tell you from experience we tend to blame people we're comfortable with for the things that happen to us in our lives, whether good or bad. Always though this is an illusion and just makes us feel better about things than saying we are solely responsible. I can say to you now no matter you're friends or what they do the final truth is that you cause everything in your life to happen. Unless he stole money from you or directly took actions to interfere with your life then he has nothing whatsoever to do with causing you troubles before. It's like this, we get comfortable with people, then our minds create fantasys whereby they are causing us problems and that if only we could be rid of them things would get better, it's a lie / trick of the ego. Good luck
EYECANDY000 Posted December 25, 2007 Posted December 25, 2007 No, you wouldnt be the bad guy.. I mean it seems like this guy has done nothing but cause harm in your life. Be blessed with your new friends
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