Frankie24 Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 Right 2 weeks back my partner decided in the spur of the moment that he would try and get his ex back even though she didnt want him back. They both have a child together this is there 1st xmas apart and he will be off with the army next year. After he left on the Friday I changed my number and by the Sunday he tried all avenues to get back in touch with me. One of our close friends gave him my number and he sent me a variety of texts including 1 saying how he regretted the decision he made, it was a spur of the moment thing, he would have only got back because of the child which would have been wrong, he loved me, etc etc took me 2 days before I got back with him. I told him i dont normally give guys a 2nd chance but considering the circumstances i could understand why he did it. Mean ive deleted the texts he sent me on that night as i was reading them and giving myself a hard time. I still need to talk to him about how im feeling but at present im to numb to. Im now trying to move on but obviously I still feel really distraught and keep thinking he is going to run off again which is natural. Im just after any info or techniques which may help me feel better, or how to stay strong and show him im not bothered about what happened. Theres still days when i feel i could just walk away. He still mentions his ex quite a bit and of course im worried about xmas day how he will react. I never asked for this extra stress but I do love the guy and im trying my best to make it work
Tripper Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 but considering the circumstances i could understand why he did it. Mean ive deleted the texts he sent me on that night as i was reading them and giving myself a hard time. I still need to talk to him about how im feeling but at present im to numb to. Im now trying to move on but obviously I still feel really distraught and keep thinking he is going to run off again which is natural. Im just after any info or techniques which may help me feel better, or how to stay strong and show him im not bothered about what happened. Theres still days when i feel i could just walk away. He still mentions his ex quite a bit and of course im worried about xmas day how he will react. I never asked for this extra stress but I do love the guy and im trying my best to make it work He sounds immature to me. I can understand about him wanting to be with his child on Christmas and he could have made arrangements to do so. Instead he bolted.. then regretted.. recanted.. and bounced back to you. And continues to talk about his ex?? WTF!! You need to have a frank discussion with this guy and find out what it is he wants because you deserve to be treated better than this. Make it clear to him that there won't be a 3rd chance if he pulls this crap again.
bserious2012 Posted December 20, 2007 Posted December 20, 2007 These are the kind of things you have to deal with when you date someone who has children because they will always have a connection with their exes, even if its just for the sake of the child. I can't say that his actions are understandable but his feelings are, especially if they have only been seperated for a short time. Also, all the dynamics of the relationship like how long they were together, who broke up wth who, etc. come into play and he's not even going to be here next year. That's a lot to think about, for you and him. Do you want to deal with this, lots of other situations could possibly occur throughout the relationship that might cause him to think about going back to his ex. And the thing is, he didn't leave you to see his son, he left you to get her back...and what if she wanted him? This is why I ask a lot of specific questions to people who have children. It can be hard to let go of horrible relationships, imagine how difficult it is to cut all ties and stop pining away for a loving relationship with someone who has your child.
Author Frankie24 Posted December 20, 2007 Author Posted December 20, 2007 I get where you both are coming from and clearly its easier for you to advice when you are looking in on us. Im seeing him on Boxing day so im going to have a think about what I want to say and make it clear. So confused about the whole situation and its not if I asked for any of this to happen.
Chrome Barracuda Posted December 20, 2007 Posted December 20, 2007 Let me get this straight, you was dating a guy who has a kid. He leaves you to try to be with his ex baby mama. She lies and then plays him, he has his balls tucked and comes crawling back to you because your the backup piece??? WTF?? Dump his sorry ass! What kind of man or human being treats a person like that? He put another person before you and acted like it's no big deal? Where your self respect as a woman and where's his logic to know you cant go back after you done blown everything up. I would have been so ashamed to show my face after that! Point blank if I was in your shoes I would not have forgiven him. But I'm not you. But just imagine if another woman comes along and he has this impulse t believe the fantasy, he wants to bounce again? Then what? He's done this once, how do you know if he aint gonna do it again? Dont trust this idiot. Do you want to be number 1 or second best? What does he say about his behavior now? Is he remorseful? Because people like him that use people and wait for the next best thing dont have any understanding of the object of honestly, love and loyalty. Screw him and leave him alone. I understand that you didnt want to start over but with people like him that does stuff like that? Why would you want to be with him. Keep your eyes open, I beleive down the line he'll do something like this again!
Author Frankie24 Posted December 29, 2007 Author Posted December 29, 2007 As much as I like to admit it your right Jesus i am so stupid
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