tkgirl Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 before it even had a REAL chance? Here's what happened... last night this guy I was seeing decided he didn't feel "that deeper connection" with me that he needs to feel. Okay fine... but we only started dating a month and a half ago! Which some may think would be plenty of time for each of us to figure out what we feel, right? But the thing is ever since we first met, our lives have been so crazy... both of us travelling a lot (for work and otherwise) and at different times... like just when he got back from a 5 day trip for work, I leave the next morning for a 8 day vacation! plus when we are both in town, our work schedules are completely opposite... basically in the month and a half that we've known each other, we've really only seen each other 4 times! But we did manage to stay in contact by talking on the phone a lot, emailing, texting etc. Not as good as actually being together, but I felt that if we were able to keep our connection so strong even when we couldn't be together, that there really was something there. And the times we finally did get together, the chemistry was crazy! We never had sex, but one night we got VERY close... both of us saying how we never wanted to so bad but that we should wait 'til we got to know each other better... which is hard to do when we never get to see each other! Anyways... so this last week when we were together (date #4) we started messing around, but all of a sudden he pulls away because it was obvious he was getting too turned on... don't need to tell you how I knew that right? He then seemed to get a little frustrated and asked "what do you think the timeline should be for us to have crazy down and dirty sex?" I wasn't sure how to answer that and I know I definitely felt like I was ready but.... then all of a sudden he changes and starts saying how he really respects me etc. Well, things cooled down after that... we just kind of cuddle and kiss but nothing heavy. Then it's getting late so he leaves and as soon as he walks out the door I get this weird feeling that I'm never going to see him again... turns out I was right! After avoiding me all weekend I finally have to call him and ask what is up. And that's when he tells me that "he just doesn't feel that deeper connection with me" huh???!!! I get upset but try to understand... I tell him that I can't make him feel anything he doesn't feel. But then I bring up the fact that we really haven't been able to spend that much time together since we met and don't you think that has something to do with it. He said it probably has a lot to do with it, but... ? I just have a hard time accepting that it is over before it even had a chance. Plus there's things like when asked him what he is looking for and he admitted to me that he doesn't really know. And also when I thought we were done talking I said "I guess this is good-bye then" he said "well, we could still hang out once in a while and do stuff as friends" what the ??? I told him no, I don't think I can be friends with him... that it's too painful because I already had stronger feelings than that. Obviously he is feeling something totally different... but I can't help but think about all the mixed signals I've gotten from him, and I honestly do not know where he is coming from. Sorry to keep rambling but I am so confused! I feel like I need to just accept what he said to me, but... anybody here got any insight to what the heck is going on? thanks!
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