bigfootfrenzy Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 Hey guys, here is the full story to my situation. Sorry for the long post. Any advice would be appreciated. I have been with this girl for about 13 months. We were LDR from the start. I was in college and she worked. we lived about 3 hours away from each other and saw each other pretty much every weekend. We fell madly in love and talked about the future intensely. it was quite an intense relationship as we are both emotional people. We started to lean on each other alot. She almost broke up with me a few times but then would change her mind and just say that she was confused. About 7 weeks ago she actually did break up with me. She broke up with me in an email after a fight on the phone. she then wouldn't reply to any of my texts of anything like that for about 4 weeks. finally she said we should talk. I spent those 4 weeks beating myself up and putting her on a pedastol. I thought that everything was my fault and i had tunnel vision and could only see the bad things that i had done. When we spoke i blamed everything on myself and said im sorry i havn't been well and i have been reacting to situations unresonably. She said that this is what made her fall out of love and changed her love for me to a "friends" love. I said i don't blame you i was a prick to you. The thing is now i can see clearly and i realise alot of my mistakes were a result of me reacting to her mistakes and so on. She said she wanted to stay friends as she could not imagine life without me. She looked so drained and really awful and this is what also pushed me to take the blame. I then rang her about a week later and she was very condescending and smug. This made me sound depressed and come across as clingy and needy no doubt. The thing is i think i have really ruined things here. I think that by taking all the blame and so on she now resents me and thinks that i wasted her time when this isn't the case at all. I was just confused and felt worthless at the time. Any oppinions are welcome. Cheers.
truckdriving Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 hey man we all make mistakes, you just need to learn from them and move on. I think it would be a good idea if you didnt have any contact with her for at least six months. If you keep talking to her you will just get depressed.
Author bigfootfrenzy Posted December 19, 2007 Author Posted December 19, 2007 Thanks truckdriving. I am just finding hard to forgive myself. She wouldn't resent me if i didnt blame myself for the whole thing. I think she now hates me.
truckdriving Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 You arent the only one to blame. It takes two to ruin a relationship
Author bigfootfrenzy Posted December 19, 2007 Author Posted December 19, 2007 Yeah i know this but thats not what she thinks now. She thinks that it was all my fault and that i am worthless and nothing more. She wanted to stay friends but not anymore because of what i said (me blaming myself). I was confused at the tiem and i would like to tell her the truth but that wouldn't get me anywhere. I just want my self respect and dignity back.
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