alcorns Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 I think I'm too dependent on my boyfriend. I begged him to move in with me in late September, and he did. On the day he moved in, I (unknowingly) began having panic attacks. As of now, I am on medications for depression/anxiety and Ambien to help me sleep at night. After all I've been through, I've lost friends, and the desire to go out and have fun. I used to be with my friends every night, but as our relationship has continued, I have become progressively more and more hermit-like. Now, it makes me feel bad if he wants to drink or go out without me, even though I know I'm not very fun to be around anymore. If he says that he wants to stay the night with a friend, I freak out, and a tremendous argument begins. I can't seem to separate myself from him (especially at night). I don't have anything else to do anymore... I've forgotten everything about the person I was before him. I don't know how to start living without him again!
luckyinlove Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 WOW!!! All I can say is that this sounds like a post I've been trying to write, but couldn't get the words straight! My relationship with my boyfriend is the SAME way. We haven't moved in together, but are together nearly everyday. When I do go out without him I can't have fun, because I'm always thinking about how I'd rather be with him. It was (and still is) just tearing our relationship apart. I used to be a social butterfly that everyone loved being around, but now if I'm not out with him I sit at home alone. He doesn't even like bringing me out with him anymore because I usually end up flipping out over something anyway. I know it isn't me, but I just get so irrational! I'm sorry if this isn't much help at all, but I just want to let you know that you definitely aren't alone. I just started taking my medication for anxiety/depression again to try and bring myself back to who I used to be, but it's just made things worse. I've run out of ideas!
D-Lish Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 I think I'm too dependent on my boyfriend. I begged him to move in with me in late September, and he did. On the day he moved in, I (unknowingly) began having panic attacks. As of now, I am on medications for depression/anxiety and Ambien to help me sleep at night. After all I've been through, I've lost friends, and the desire to go out and have fun. I used to be with my friends every night, but as our relationship has continued, I have become progressively more and more hermit-like. Now, it makes me feel bad if he wants to drink or go out without me, even though I know I'm not very fun to be around anymore. If he says that he wants to stay the night with a friend, I freak out, and a tremendous argument begins. I can't seem to separate myself from him (especially at night). I don't have anything else to do anymore... I've forgotten everything about the person I was before him. I don't know how to start living without him again! Either your medication hasn't kicked in yet, or you should discuss switching meds with your doctor. Not all meds work the same on all people. If you are still experiencing these symptoms and you have been on the meds for at least two months- then finding a better dose/med is the way to go. Are you in therapy in conjunction with taking the meds? If not- you should be. This will help you to spread your dependance to a third party so your bf doesn't get overwhelmed by being your sole lifeline. I started taking meds for the same condition after my divorce and I tried out a few different kinds before finding the right mix for me. What really helped was talking to a therapist in conjunction with the meds. Meds can only take you so far- third party intervention can and should play an important role in getting things back on track. Remember- your bf is your lover... not your therapist!
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