Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 Yea if he were to know what I'm thinking he'd probably be scared off and totally gone! (so if he so happens to read this, I'm done with! lol) I've been trying my best to think positive....I know he looked really sad about me leaving for 1.5 weeks so the best case scenario for him not looking so excited is that he was just sad about this! *crosses fingers* Either way, I've pretty much trained myself to let things go when they turn out to be disappointments. So even if he does disappear, I can deal with it. I"ll be devastaed for a day or two but I'll get over it. I always do.
EYECANDY000 Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 I know exactly what you are going through right now. Has anything happened for him not to want to contact you any more. I see it as people feel like they have to abibe by the whole dating rules. When ultimately you, yourself set your own rules. Hes possibly just giving you a little space in between time. give it a few days and see what happens
Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 Any word, Fray? Call/text/IM/email? nothing yet.....I'm already starting to instill my head with thoughts that if he's gone for good, then it's just not meant to be...in preparation for the worse
Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 I know exactly what you are going through right now. Has anything happened for him not to want to contact you any more. I see it as people feel like they have to abibe by the whole dating rules. When ultimately you, yourself set your own rules. Hes possibly just giving you a little space in between time. give it a few days and see what happens Nothing major that I can recall right now. But part of dating is that it's so unpredictable at times ya know? But hopefully you are right that he's giving me space because we definitely had a full and packed weekend with each other and even I haven't started 'missing' him yet. P.S. Is dry s*x considered a 'sexual activity'? Cuz if so, well.....
EYECANDY000 Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 . P.S. Is dry s*x considered a 'sexual activity'? Cuz if so, well..... oooooooh bad girl!!!
Star Gazer Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 I'm sure someone will come out and argue with me, but if I were in your shoes, this is what I would do. I would call him sometime tomorrow "just to see" if he was still available to take me to the airport. I would tell him that if he couldn't take me that I could find alternative transportation but would greatly prefer a handsome chauffeur. *wink, wink* His tone of voice/response will tell you a lot about what he's thinking. Whatever you do, DO NOT make any mention of the fact that he hasn't called or of your concerns. Be light and breezy.
D-Lish Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 ooooo, the dry hump.... nice. Yes, I suppose it is sexual activity... When you like someone and you don't hear from them, it can cause a whole stream of thoughts to play around in your head. But you are doing the right thing by venting here and remaining outwardly calm in his presence.
Legend Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 I'm sure someone will come out and argue with me, but if I were in your shoes, this is what I would do. I would call him sometime tomorrow "just to see" if he was still available to take me to the airport. I would tell him that if he couldn't take me that I could find alternative transportation but would greatly prefer a handsome chauffeur. *wink, wink* His tone of voice/response will tell you a lot about what he's thinking. Whatever you do, DO NOT make any mention of the fact that he hasn't called or of your concerns. Be light and breezy. I'm a guy, and gonna have to agree with Star. You don't want to come on too strong, so suggesting alternate transportation is good, but admit you'd prefer him to take you, shows interest, and if he's into you, will pick up on that. Definitely don't bring up the fact that he hasn't attempted to contact you, you don't want to come off as being too clingy and push him away further. The sinking feeling is terrible, sorry you're going through that.
Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 I'm sure someone will come out and argue with me, but if I were in your shoes, this is what I would do. I would call him sometime tomorrow "just to see" if he was still available to take me to the airport. I would tell him that if he couldn't take me that I could find alternative transportation but would greatly prefer a handsome chauffeur. *wink, wink* His tone of voice/response will tell you a lot about what he's thinking. Whatever you do, DO NOT make any mention of the fact that he hasn't called or of your concerns. Be light and breezy. I know what you mean, but for me I just have too much pride . If he doesnt call me to take me to the airport, then I just take it to mean he lost interest. I will be disappointed, but I will be fine as well and I'll leave it at that. I guess it will be ending things on a 'good' note after all. tragic.
Star Gazer Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 I know what you mean, but for me I just have too much pride . If he doesnt call me to take me to the airport, then I just take it to mean he lost interest. I will be disappointed, but I will be fine as well and I'll leave it at that. I guess it will be ending things on a 'good' note after all. tragic. He could be waiting for you to call too, ya know.
Legend Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 I know what you mean, but for me I just have too much pride . If he doesnt call me to take me to the airport, then I just take it to mean he lost interest. I will be disappointed, but I will be fine as well and I'll leave it at that. I guess it will be ending things on a 'good' note after all. tragic. We like it when women show interest too. This could be one of those stupid tests (if that is the case, this is just another perfect example of why the rules, and games need to stop). Swallow the pride, and pick up the phone, and get a ride to the airport!....or closure.
Green Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 stop worying about that stuff and just enjoy, no point in worying all the time hun
Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 We like it when women show interest too. This could be one of those stupid tests (if that is the case, this is just another perfect example of why the rules, and games need to stop). Swallow the pride, and pick up the phone, and get a ride to the airport!....or closure. One reason I thought he was different and I liked him was because I thought he was straightforward and honest (he knows it too, I told him). If this is a test, then I will be fine without him. I know when I offer someone a ride, I don't expect them to call me to ask me because that will be awkward for them. I myself will call and ask when the pickup time is. But right now it's only tuesday afternoon so I will wait until Wed night to see.
EYECANDY000 Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 Sometimes pride blinds people from whats really important.. Ive learned that first hand!
oppath Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 He could be waiting for you to call too, ya know. So true. I basically test women. After a few dates, I sit back and see if they initiate contact with me. I want a woman who does this and my best relationships it has happened naturally.
Star Gazer Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 So true. I basically test women. After a few dates, I sit back and see if they initiate contact with me. I want a woman who does this and my best relationships it has happened naturally. It makes sense. A real relationship is a partnership where effort is (relatively) equal. How many times have you initiated contact/dates, Fray?
oppath Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 It makes sense. A real relationship is a partnership where effort is (relatively) equal. How many times have you initiated contact/dates, Fray? It makes perfect sense. If I've invited a woman out 4 or 5 times I'm pretty much looking for her to email me the next day and say "I had so much fun last night. My friend's band is playing on Thursday night, want to come?" As far as I am concerned, if a woman is interested in me, she will do this. I've dated women who did not who persisted they were interested but the end result was me feeling like I was doing work. I felt like I was chasing. There is a difference between the thrill of the chase still existing vs actual chasing. Actual chasing sucks sweaty donkey balls.
Author fray718 Posted December 18, 2007 Author Posted December 18, 2007 It makes sense. A real relationship is a partnership where effort is (relatively) equal. How many times have you initiated contact/dates, Fray? Oh actually I've followed oppath's advice on this based on his previous posts. Basically, I do what feels right and natural for the most part. He initiaited dates 1-4. But 2 hours after date 2 I texted him thanking him for the night and telling him good luck with studying (he thought that was sweet ). I always send him a txt before exams wishing him luck and he thanks me for thinking of him (I do, and the texts show it). Honestly, we are both good and nice people. I like him because he's sweet and nice and he likes me for the same reason (we told each other this). He initiated date 5 (meeting his friends) and I told him he should meet my friends too (date 6). I'm very nice to him because honestly I do care about him already eventhough it's only been a few weeks (I've dated guys for months without caring about them nearly this much!). We have one of those relatinships (at least from my standpoint) that you don't find often in life. We're not exactly dating as much as we are already a 'couple'. Gosh, I'm turning into mush
Star Gazer Posted December 18, 2007 Posted December 18, 2007 Oh actually I've followed oppath's advice on this based on his previous posts. Basically, I do what feels right and natural for the most part. He initiaited dates 1-4. But 2 hours after date 2 I texted him thanking him for the night and telling him good luck with studying (he thought that was sweet ). I always send him a txt before exams wishing him luck and he thanks me for thinking of him (I do, and the texts show it). Honestly, we are both good and nice people. I like him because he's sweet and nice and he likes me for the same reason (we told each other this). He initiated date 5 (meeting his friends) and I told him he should meet my friends too (date 6). I'm very nice to him because honestly I do care about him already eventhough it's only been a few weeks (I've dated guys for months without caring about them nearly this much!). We have one of those relatinships (at least from my standpoint) that you don't find often in life. We're not exactly dating as much as we are already a 'couple'. Gosh, I'm turning into mush You're not a couple until you BOTH agree to it. So in order words, he's initiated all the dates. You only sent him a text after date #2. Hmm. Being "very nice" to someone doesn't mean you're INITIATING anything or putting in the same amount of effort as he is. If in his shoes, would you think you're as interested as you are?
Author fray718 Posted December 19, 2007 Author Posted December 19, 2007 You're not a couple until you BOTH agree to it. So in order words, he's initiated all the dates. You only sent him a text after date #2. Hmm. Being "very nice" to someone doesn't mean you're INITIATING anything or putting in the same amount of effort as he is. If in his shoes, would you think you're as interested as you are? That's why I put 'couple' in quoation marks. He refers to us as a couple and we act like it but ofcourse it's not official. I guess I'm traditioanl in that I let the guy initiate. He seems to be the type who likes initiating.
Star Gazer Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 I guess I'm traditioanl in that I let the guy initiate. He seems to be the type who likes initiating. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that most guys your age will be more like oppath. If you never initiate, don't expect him to ad infinitum.
oppath Posted December 19, 2007 Posted December 19, 2007 I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say that most guys your age will be more like oppath. Handsome, charming, funny, and turning down MIT for graduate school? No wonder I'm single if I have to compete with that!
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