mika Posted December 14, 2007 Posted December 14, 2007 i know i am the only one who can make a decision here but i am so totally lost! my boyfriend and i have been together for 4 months. everything was of course wonderful an really, they still should be in such a new relationship. the reality is though that they aren't I have broken up with him 2 times in four months. the last time i broke up with him it was just what i knew had to be done. he is who he is. my reasons for the break-up were that he is self-absorbed, he flip flops on life decisions like wether to quit his job or go into the army or move back home (300 miles away) and so on and so on. he is depressed and sulks when he is lost. he cuts me off in conversation and does not follow through on his word. I told him all of these things and at first he was angry and would not talk to me at all about it. after a couple of days he came over and we watched a movie. he poured his heart out to me telling me how he doesn't want to lose me and that he loves me so much and has just been hurt so much in the past that he had all of these barriers up and all. well, i chickened out and told him we could get back together. i felt so bad that i could not hold my ground. i care for him a lot and love him as a person. i am not in love with him and i know that he can not just change. he has already let me down. he says things i guess just to say them and when he doesn't follow through its like not even a big deal to him. the point is, i want to end it again for real and tell him that there is no hope. the feelings are gone now! its almost christmas and i hate to do this now, but i feel like it might be even more unfair to wait. i know he is going to be hurt and i feel like an ass. i knew i didn't want to be with him anymore and that is why i broke it off this last time. i realized that he is who he is and that i don't want a man like that. but i got worried about his feelings and now i feel even worse!!!! i guess what i'm looking for is what is the best way to do this. i want to be honest but im not so sure he will understand that. i mean we just decided to get back together on monday! it is now friday. but i am no happier. i feel like a liar. i am a liar. i am lieing to him right now because i do not want this relationship. i just hate that i have done this. my friends keep saying it won't matter how i do it or when, he will be hurt no matter what. but is it best to do it now because that is the truth and i won't be stringing him along or should i wait till christmas is over. his family lives 300 miles away and he only has about 3 close friends in this town. he is always telling me that i'm all he's got and that i am the only reason he is even still here. he doesn't feel like anyone cares about him. please help!!!
blon_dee Posted December 15, 2007 Posted December 15, 2007 If you really feel that way, i think it would be unfair to string him along longer?? Its a tough one though... Good luck
bustertypsy Posted December 15, 2007 Posted December 15, 2007 You've made up your mind,do it now.Either way it's gonna hurt,but the sooner you do it the quicker he begins to heal.
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