Nadine78 Posted December 14, 2007 Posted December 14, 2007 I am having a real hard time coming to terms with how an ex treated me. Just to give you some background history I have always been in horrible relationships, one which was abusive, even the relationship that I have with my dad is non-existent because he was verbally abusive. Even in my relationships with men it has never been positive. I have been sexually assaulted, physically assaulted and lied to many times. Well anyway, I was seeing someone for a year and he seemed really nice and showed me attention and what it seemed at the time respect. We had a lot in common and had good times together. Something that I have never been used to with men because I always get walked upon. I developed feelings for this guy. Just like me, he was well educated and we worked in the same field of Education/ teaching. I presummed that he had some morals since we both worked in the teaching field. We weren't in a committed relationship but seeing each other. From what he told me was that women in past relationships treated him poorly even though he said that he was a really nice guy. So in my interactions with him, I was very patient and treated him like gold because I did not want him to think that I was like the other women that he said treated him poorly. We stopped seeing each other for a few months and then he contacted me out of the blue and wanted to see me. So it brought all my feelings back and I gave him a second chance. To make a long story short, (after seeing him again) things seemed to be going well. However it did not last long. Months later, I noticed that he was distant from me and so I asked him straight up if he was still interested in me. He reassured that he was still interested in me and that it was just really busy with work. But his behaviour carried on for 3 weeks and so I sent him an email asking him what's up. Then he wrote back plainly, well I guess that you have all these questions that you need answers for . He said if I search within myself I guess that I might be avoiding you. He said I have been seeing this girlfriend that I have had and I need to focus on it. It's not really working out between her and I but until I figure out what I want to do then You and I cannot not hangout anymore because it will just add confusion and make the situation worse. And then he ended the email by saying - thanks for writing me and ended it with a smiley face emoticon. So he had a gf the whole time. So in my reply I told him not to bother and that I was moving on with my life. But it hurts really bad because, I honestly thought that I met someone who finally treated me with respect and cared. It's not the breaking up that bothers me but it's the way that he did it in such a disrespectful manner. I would never treat someone like that. And the games that he played and the lying hurts a lot. I did not expect that from him at all because he seemed really nice and we both teach. My self-esteem right about now is very low. I have no problems meeting men but now I really cannot trust anymore and I am really hurt. I feel like trash although people tell me differently. And I am still trying to figure out why someone would treat someone like that. My friends tell me that it will come back to him and that he is no good, but I don't care because he already did what he did and it doesn't make me feel better and nor does it mend the hurt that I feel. Any comments or advice?
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