cant let go Posted December 14, 2007 Posted December 14, 2007 today i was thinking about my ex and his new relationship and i'm wondering what he is feeling for her. They have been together for a couple of months now (since our split). I can't help but wonder if my ex still had some feelings left for me. Honestly, I would have no way of ever knowing if he did because he would never admit to it. Anyway, a memory overwhelmed me of a time when i was with him and I was always skeptical that he might still harbor feelings for his ex. I had moments of jealousy and feelings of insecurity that when he talked to her he might think a lot about how things were with her and miss her and wish he was back with her. Funny thing is that now I can't even imagine that he thinks of me at all. Now that I'm the ex and sometimes I have a friendly conversation with him. Now, I can't even imagine that he has any feelings whatsoever left for me, his ex. I just hear him in my head when he told me "i'm with you, now. I love you." I imagine him saying these words to his new girlfriend. I guess the difference is that he broke up with me whereas his ex before me broke up with him. I hate that I feel like it should mean something that I still feel that connection with him when we talk. Like if we are out with a group and something is said and our eyes just lock up and we smile because we know we are thinking the same thing and we know we are the only ones who get it. I hate that these moments are so important to me and i'm afraid that he just shrugs them off. augh... It's been a few weeks now since we've really had a conversation. I see him most days of the week at lunch with our friends but we usually just say hi at the most and carry on conversations with other people or as a group. I'm maintaining NC to the degree that I'm not emailing him or texting him or calling him. I still see him about so it's hard to really get the full effects of NC. I'm cycling through the stages again. I think i'm back at anger. I know I'll never stop having feelings for him but i need to physically get away from him so that i can stop dredging them back up all the time. I should be moving in the next 2.5 months, so that should help.
loveinlife Posted December 14, 2007 Posted December 14, 2007 today i was thinking about my ex and his new relationship and i'm wondering what he is feeling for her. They have been together for a couple of months now (since our split). I can't help but wonder if my ex still had some feelings left for me. Honestly, I would have no way of ever knowing if he did because he would never admit to it. Anyway, a memory overwhelmed me of a time when i was with him and I was always skeptical that he might still harbor feelings for his ex. I had moments of jealousy and feelings of insecurity that when he talked to her he might think a lot about how things were with her and miss her and wish he was back with her. Funny thing is that now I can't even imagine that he thinks of me at all. Now that I'm the ex and sometimes I have a friendly conversation with him. Now, I can't even imagine that he has any feelings whatsoever left for me, his ex. I just hear him in my head when he told me "i'm with you, now. I love you." I imagine him saying these words to his new girlfriend. I guess the difference is that he broke up with me whereas his ex before me broke up with him. I hate that I feel like it should mean something that I still feel that connection with him when we talk. Like if we are out with a group and something is said and our eyes just lock up and we smile because we know we are thinking the same thing and we know we are the only ones who get it. I hate that these moments are so important to me and i'm afraid that he just shrugs them off. augh... It's been a few weeks now since we've really had a conversation. I see him most days of the week at lunch with our friends but we usually just say hi at the most and carry on conversations with other people or as a group. I'm maintaining NC to the degree that I'm not emailing him or texting him or calling him. I still see him about so it's hard to really get the full effects of NC. I'm cycling through the stages again. I think i'm back at anger. I know I'll never stop having feelings for him but i need to physically get away from him so that i can stop dredging them back up all the time. I should be moving in the next 2.5 months, so that should help. i know its hard to not think about them once we have spent time together w our exes. Try not to think too much into what he is doing because it'll hurt you and prolong the healing process. Did he break up with you? My recent ex doesn't want to talk to me anymore and she had already been hanging out with a lot of guys and will take vacations with them. She won't even spend Christmas with me. I think she might have found a potential mate already and it has been only 1.5 weeks since our breakup. I dunno, im hurt by it too by how things turned out for us. We were so good together in the beginning. i loved spending time with her. Take care of you inner emotions and thoughts, since its the past, try to leave it there. let them go and if its meant to be they will come back. good luck buttercup =)
loveinlife Posted December 14, 2007 Posted December 14, 2007 Forgot to say what goes around does come around, learned from past experience, have a good night sweetie =)
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