Ex is contacting me. Hmm..

[mint_tea]

So my ex, who was the dumper, has been initiating contact. He has IM'ed me several times over the last few days and has prolonged the conversations when they seem to run out of steam (when we first broke up he avoided doing that). He's mentioned a few times during our conversations that he is done with classes today. I don't know why he is contacting me out of the blue, could it be that he misses me? I'm not sure how to proceed. I've dated 3 guys since the break up (one of them is his friend, who had a crush on me for a while. I don't think this will get back to my ex, though.) I really want to get back together (I would take things SUPER slow, though).

 

 

Here are the circumstances that led up to this initiation of contact:

 

He broke up with me a month ago. He said he just didn't want a relationship right now (we were LDR, and I was way too clingy). He was crying, and said I'm probably the best girl he's ever had and because of that, it was so hard to break up with me. He said it wasn't my fault, that his friends love me - he just couldn't have a gf right now. I was contacting him on AIM after the break up with some hope of reconciliation. After weeks of confusion, I flat out asked him if there was any chance we could forget the past and start over, and he said he has realized over the last few weeks that he wants to be single for a few months at least, and that it wasn't my fault. It got ugly, with me saying he was stringing me along the whole time (which he was), and he said "*you* were the one that wanted to keep in contact". I said, "I should have listened to you all those times you said I deserved better" and then blocked him for a few days. I was looking at his facebook and he was indicating that he was not in a good place, mentally (with finals approaching, I guess). I unblocked him on AIM and his away message said something along the lines of him being a f***ing idiot and that he needed to drown his sorrows in booze. I IM'ed him and said "Look, I know things didn't work out, but I still care about you. I saw your way msg, are you ok? I'm asking as a friend." He responded saying he couldn't talk right now, but that if I was still online later he would definitely talk to me then. He never came online, but wrote on my facebook wall that he was sorry for not coming online, that he hadn't gotten in until 3 in the morning. Then he IM'ed me the next day and we talked about finals and stuff for a little bit.

 

A few days later, a guy at my school took an interest in me. He went on my facebook while I was sitting next to him and jokingly revised everything to say that I was "in a relationship" and that it was complicated, etc. He made my job "Booth Babe" (he is a DJ on the college radio station) and put on the job description that I should "stop by sometime ;)" He changed just about everything, and also wrote some very flirtatious messages on my wall. I kiddingly put on my facebook status, "Way to hack my profile, M!!"

 

After this, my ex reached out and started IM'ing me. We haven't talked about what happened with us, just talking about what's going on in our lives. We've been joking with each other quite a bit. He suggested that I name this mouse that keeps crossing my path Artie, after the character on Pete & Pete (we watched it when we were together). He said, "you *know* he had to have trained one". I'm transferring to my ex's college this coming semester (my decision had NOTHING to do with him). I casually mentioned that I hadn't heard anything back on the residence situation. He asked me what dorm hall I was going to be in (I don't know yet). Was he trying to find out if I would be in his hall?

 

Also, since this aforementioned other guy started leaving me messages on facebook, my ex's facebook status has had messages that I think are intended for me. His status said that he was listening to this certain CD a lot that, when we were together, he said reminded him so much of me (he would point out songs that reminded him of specific instances (car rides late at night, etc.) and said the songs made him think about me "so damn much"). We had a connection with every single song on that album. It's an obscure artist that few people listen to (when things got rough, he would say, "come on, who else am i gonna talk about TW with?"), so I know no one else would get that reference. He also had on there, D is: "regretting a lot of freaking things." A day later, he started IM'ing me and being really conversational (very out of character for him since the break-up).

 

I wish I knew what was going through his mind! He's had some life experiences (almost dying of brain cancer, for one) that really separate him from your "typical" guy, so he's hard to read. I'm hoping that now that he's on winter break and without the pressures of school, he'll have time to think about how he lost "the best girl he's ever had".