xfess Posted December 13, 2007 Posted December 13, 2007 I met this girl on the online personals at the end of November and we went on our 1st date on December 1st and we had a great time. She loved my sense of humor and liked the fact I was a "Man's Man" which I took as flattering - she even said this was one of the best dates shes ever had. I talked to her on the phone that sunday to say I had a great time and that I was hoping to make plans for a future 2nd date, she said she'd "pencil me in" as a joke. However the problem lately has been that she's a busy girl - she works 8-4 then goes to class/internship from 4-8 and has been busy the past few days since, writing term papers and presentations for her masters program she's currently in. So I asked her when we'd be able to go out on another date she says she doesnt know right now because of school work. My problem is that Im very impatient when it comes to starting a relationship. I dont want to rush it but I want to be able to at least go out at least once during the week or talk on occasion just to have her get to know me better and have her believe there can be something more to this - since our date Ive only talked to her once on the phone and chatted online 3 times. On another post I mentioned that she blocked me on AIM but I just assumed she did that so that she wouldnt get distracted with her work by me chatting with her online. I told her I understood her situation and supported her with her busy schedule this month and that I can wait until its done. Shes a great girl with a great sense of humor to match me, and I am wishing that her school work is done so we can go out on another date, but Ive also been talking to other girls online as well just to be on the safe side if she doesnt want another date. One girl gave me her email address but Im not sure - I like this girl Ive been seeing and I really want to go out with her, but do I talk to this other girl in the meantime? I just dont want to tell this other girl a week later that "thanks for chatting with me but Im seeing another girl...bye" Im not that type of guy.
Jilly Bean Posted December 13, 2007 Posted December 13, 2007 I think at your age, and your current position, you should most definitely be multi-dating. This girl you like seems very busy, and may not have the same time and focus as you for a relationship. Best to continue to pursue her, while the others. Nothing wrong with that.
BeautifulMystique Posted December 13, 2007 Posted December 13, 2007 I told her I understood her situation and supported her with her busy schedule this month and that I can wait until its done. You said you understood so act like it. There's nothing wrong in going out with other girls while you're pursuing her, just like Jilly Bean said. Who knows, the other girl might have a great sense of humour? Why settle for the first girl you go out with when you know there is a lot more out there? When I am going through a busy period, the last thing I want is for a guy to push me into going out with him. Being impatient isn't flattering.
gfto Posted December 13, 2007 Posted December 13, 2007 I talked to her on the phone that sunday to say I had a great time and that I was hoping to make plans for a future 2nd date mistake. you're next phone call after the first date should be strictly to ask for a second and specific date; not to tell her you had a great time and hope to make plans for a second date. So I asked her when we'd be able to go out on another date she says she doesnt know right now because of school work. This is a polite way of saying she isn't interested. If she was interested, she'd make time for another date. On another post I mentioned that she blocked me on AIM but I just assumed she did that so that she wouldnt get distracted with her work by me chatting with her online. she blocked you because she isn't interested. don't rationalize her behavior. I just dont want to tell this other girl a week later that "thanks for chatting with me but Im seeing another girl...bye" Im not that type of guy. you sound like a "nice guy."
Author xfess Posted December 15, 2007 Author Posted December 15, 2007 well thats not entirely true. when I did call her I did make plans for the following saturday to go out (i wanted to keep the plans a surprise for her). She has been busy because she does 12hrs a day between work/school/internship so she does have to do papers she doesnt have too much time - shes one of those girls who does school work first and everything else later. Although she did block me before she has been online on my account lately and has IM'd me - so why would she still IM me if she wasnt interested? I think its more of a hard to get thing. I get the feeling she doesnt trust me too early in these stages thinking Im too good to be true and Im only after one thing - which is not true. The problem is that shes got the upper hand on this, shes got a degree in psychology and getting a masters in family therapy so she knows about all these things so Im trying not to seem too "needy" and lose her interest so I did not try to contact her at all since our last conversation monday - but i did send a funny email to her today so im sure to get a good response back from her. I have talked to other girls online the past day or so but to be honest I really like this girl. I know we only went on one date, but she is smart, funny, pretty and lives close by.
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