Im about to ask something that could make or break my relationship! Should i???

[4givrnt4gtr]

So in about 2 hours Im going to see my SO.

 

I realized that a lot of the issues and over analyzing i do regarding our relationship is bc i dont know how exactly he feels about me.

 

SO

 

in order to get rid of that I am going to ask him. Straight out. How he feels about me....

 

Im going to ask him like this:

 

So...in a scale of 1 to 10...how much do you like me? 1 being No thanks!, 5 being...ehhhh whatever, 10 being I really really really like you....

 

I know he's gonna ask me why Im asking this and Im going to tell him that I just need to know, straight from his mouth, how much he likes me so I stop wondering and overanalyzing why he does certain things...

 

Now if he says like 5 or below....Im pretty much done...

 

Anything above 7 is acceptable....

Is this a good idea or does it look needy??? help!!! I need opinions ASAP before I ask him!!!!

[allina]

I think it's more than fair to ask your bf how he feels about you, you deserve to know that. I wouldn't do the rating from 1-10 though, that's a little weird. Instead maybe you could just tell him that the relationship is important to you and that you'd like to know how he feels about you and the relationship.

 

How old are you? How long have you been with him?

[4givrnt4gtr]

How old are you? How long have you been with him?

 

 

haha oh yes i know i sound quite young...im 24. Ive been with him for 6 months...

 

I just havent had the best experiences with men....REALLY bad..in fact. And he's the first one I actually feel is worth the fight.

 

As to why i do the 1-10 thing..is more to not make it so serious, AND get an answer i can understand without wondering what he actually meant.

 

Why do you think it'll be weird?

[thewholeshabangg]

i would strongly, strongly suggest you NOT doing it. guys, well, anyone does not like to be put in a position like this. If you want to ask him his feelings for you, ask him. but don't give him a scale option, that will make him feel trapped, and yes it will make you look needy.

I think you should just ask him how he feels for you if you are worried about it

[Zona76]

Hold on here... it depends on how long you've been together.

One date? I'd say you need to see him a bit more than to reject that 5. But then again if you've been going out a few weeks or months and still nothing significant in the way of words, it's pointless to even ask.

Some guys don't like this question. And the way you plan to ask is very incorrect.

I think I'd begin to say something like I enjoy the time we spend together. It's one of the things I look forward to most of all. Then wait and hope for a response.

[allina]

haha oh yes i know i sound quite young...im 24. Ive been with him for 6 months...

 

I just havent had the best experiences with men....REALLY bad..in fact. And he's the first one I actually feel is worth the fight.

 

As to why i do the 1-10 thing..is more to not make it so serious, AND get an answer i can understand without wondering what he actually meant.

 

Why do you think it'll be weird?

 

I know it must be hard to bounce back from bad experience with men, I hope they improve for you.

 

I think the 1-10 rating may not be the best because things like feelings in a relationship are a serious topic and you want to be able communicate this stuff in an adult, confident manner. I feel like by doing the rating thing he might not take you seriously or he may think you're being immature/childish. If he doesn't take you seriously it may be difficult to get an honest reply.

 

Good luck in whatever you decide to do.

[4givrnt4gtr]

phew see this is why i ask you guys...so it sounds like the whole scale thing is out of the window....

 

We've been together for 6 months...he is adamant about not sayin "i love you" until he feels is the right time and for that he wants it to be a long term relationship (a year or more).

 

Other than that, he calls me his baby, and all that...but i need to know how much he likes me....

How do i go about that???

[lonelybird]

I am not sure the 'ask him thing', if he loves you or not, interested in you or not, he will show with action. some guys are pretty smooth concerning talking. but some men are very geniue

 

my advise would be 'patient', but you are the one who know exactly your situation

[norajane]

Why are you having so much anxiety about how he feels about you? His ACTIONS - how he treats you - ought to tell you how he feels far better than words.

[4givrnt4gtr]

Why are you having so much anxiety about how he feels about you? His ACTIONS - how he treats you - ought to tell you how he feels far better than words.

 

Well thing is...from an earlier experience where the guy SEEMED to be living and dying for me, then telling me that, (a few days after swearing treating me to a lovely valentine's dinner) he never actually felt much for me, im a bit weary about the whole actions speak louder than words.

 

I think i need both words and the reassurance that Im not reading more into what he does than what he means.

 

Anyway, we did talk last nite...I asked him if he liked me. He asked me what i thought. I told him i needed to hear it from him. He hugged me really tight, kissed me hard and told me that he ofcourse likes and asked me if there was something wrong.

 

We finally cleared out some things ive been wondering about...thank god...hopefully now things will go smoother...