dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Today, while barbequeing, my step daughter ( for lack of a better name since I'm not married, but live together) mentions that she has told my daughter (in my daughter's presence) about the Playstation2 I have purchased for Christmas. Step-daughter seems to think that said PS2 is only for my son, but it's actually a joint gift from "Santa." Meanwhile, daughter is in the 4th grade and I'm having a hard time believing that she still believes in "Santa." So, I bite my tongue and say nothing and ponder what to do about the situation for many hours. Do I tell her, or do I wait and let her figure it out? Eventually I decide to call my 4th grade daughter aside and do some explaining, figuring that the whole "Santa" thing is probably being pretended for her 7 year old brother. So I call her aside and lay it on the line. Guess what? She's stunned and heart broken. She cried. I cried. I have officially ruined my child's belief in something "otherworldly." I feel like crap. I AM crap.
addicted2love Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Today, while barbequeing, my step daughter ( for lack of a better name since I'm not married, but live together) mentions that she has told my daughter (in my daughter's presence) about the Playstation2 I have purchased for Christmas. Step-daughter seems to think that said PS2 is only for my son, but it's actually a joint gift from "Santa." Meanwhile, daughter is in the 4th grade and I'm having a hard time believing that she still believes in "Santa." So, I bite my tongue and say nothing and ponder what to do about the situation for many hours. Do I tell her, or do I wait and let her figure it out? Eventually I decide to call my 4th grade daughter aside and do some explaining, figuring that the whole "Santa" thing is probably being pretended for her 7 year old brother. So I call her aside and lay it on the line. Guess what? She's stunned and heart broken. She cried. I cried. I have officially ruined my child's belief in something "otherworldly." I feel like crap. I AM crap. Oh no! I'm so sorry that happened. I have an 8 year old that hasn't mentioned Santa much this year. I've been wondering if she still believes..I've been afraid to "ask her". I hate that his happened to you but I'm glad you posted about it...I'm gonna keep my mouth shut thanks to your post. Wish I had a suggestion on how to make your child (and you) feel better. Best wishes! A2L
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 She asked me in the first grade and I responded that if she believed that there is a Santa Claus, that there is. I didn't want to lie! She is now 10. I REALLY thought she was just going along. She mentions Santa all the time, but I honestly didn't think she really believed. I feel so bad. I tried to explain that opening a gift from "santa" that she had knowledge of would have been confusing and that I thought I was doing the right thing, but maybe I could have come up with a viable explanation. One that could have allowed her belief. I've been doing that for years! Or so I thought. She mentioned that she doesn't believe in the Easter Bunny because she saw a receipt. Guess I wasn't doing as well as I thought.
addicted2love Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 She asked me in the first grade and I responded that if she believed that there is a Santa Claus, that there is. I didn't want to lie! She is now 10. I REALLY thought she was just going along. She mentions Santa all the time, but I honestly didn't think she really believed. I feel so bad. I tried to explain that opening a gift from "santa" that she had knowledge of would have been confusing and that I thought I was doing the right thing, but maybe I could have come up with a viable explanation. One that could have allowed her belief. I've been doing that for years! Or so I thought. She mentioned that she doesn't believe in the Easter Bunny because she saw a receipt. Guess I wasn't doing as well as I thought. Well if she told you she didn't believe in the easter bunny anymore all you could do was assume that santa went out the window too! I would have a2l
Ariadne Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Well, She is now 10. I REALLY thought she was just going along. She mentions Santa all the time, but I honestly didn't think she really believed. I feel so bad. She was going to find out eventually. I had to tell my son because he wouldn't believe his friends or anyone else but me. So I had to tell him, at 11 or so, look, there's no Santa ok? He's like, I'm glad you told me because my children would have wondered whatever happened to Santa. Ariadne
Citizen Erased Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Trust me, worse ways of finding the truth out have happened. My friend when she was 8 was at a shopping centre lining up to have her pic taken with santa. Very cute. Unfortunately, that santa proceeded to have a heart attack So she thought santa was dead, was absolutely hysterical. Her parents decided to tell her, for her own sanity I guess. Also so that she wouldn't be regaling her friends with the story that santa was dead. Imagine the fuss that would kick up! She never did find out if he was okay or not DDL nearly ever kid learns the truth and get over it eventually. She had to find out eventually and it is much better it is from you, then from her discovering it on Christmas morning when she opens that present up knowing full well you had bought it.
Citizen Erased Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Are you telling me there is no Santa Claus? Aww nothing sexier then a man who still believes in Santa
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 I'm feeling less crap-like. Thank you. I mean , I stopped believing at like age 7! And I , of course, informed my 5 year old sister of this apparent ruse! Still, this girl was HEARTBROKEN! I feel so responsible for that! Who believes at 10???? I guess I know one person....
johan Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 You could have just handed her Santa is Dead, by Friedrich Nietzche, and walked away. Not many people are aware of his line of childrens' books. They aren't very popular.
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 You could have just handed her Santa is Dead, by Friedrich Nietzche, and walked away. Not many people are aware of his line of childrens' books. They aren't very popular. She's an avid reader (thank...whoever..God?...maybe Nietzche? I'm not picky) Wish I had known about the children's line. Love you, Johan.
burning 4 revenge Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 First goes Santa, then goes God and eventually goes your faith in the human race
burning 4 revenge Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 You could have just handed her Santa is Dead, by Friedrich Nietzche, and walked away. Not many people are aware of his line of childrens' books. They aren't very popular. :laugh: Now that is the most memorable LS Moment 2007 hands down!
Citizen Erased Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 :laugh: Now that is the most memorable LS Moment 2007 hands down! Yes but I don't think DDL got it
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 Yes but I don't think DDL got it Oh, I got it. My attempted sarcasm didn't translate as well as Johan's. I'm welll aware of who Nietzche is, the whole "God is dead" and it's all our fault, and that there is no line of children's books. Now, who will wipe the blood off me now that Santa is dead?
Moose Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Oh, I got it. My attempted sarcasm didn't translate as well as Johan's. I'm welll aware of who Nietzche is, the whole "God is dead" and it's all our fault, and that there is no line of children's books. Now, who will wipe the blood off me now that Santa is dead?Why not tell her about St. Nicholas? Sure....Santa doesn't fly around in a sleigh with magic reindeer, but there really was a, "Santa Claus"..... http://santas.net/stnicholas.htm
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 Why not tell her about St. Nicholas? Sure....Santa doesn't fly around in a sleigh with magic reindeer, but there really was a, "Santa Claus"..... http://santas.net/stnicholas.htm Thank you, Moose. That's a wonderful suggestion and a great way to keep some "magic" in the season.
Storyrider Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 This is a tough one. I always tell my kids that Santa is a wonderful story that we all like to participate in to help make Christmas more fun and special. This year, 8 yr old was asking some questions, and I didn't want to tip my hand or lie. I said, "Santa is just as real as Cody," (her stuffed animal dog) She got very adamant and said, "Cody is totally real!" And I said, "There's your answer." I still put out the cookies and milk and eat and drink them. I still load their stockings. It is fun.
sb129 Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 You could have just handed her Santa is Dead, by Friedrich Nietzche, and walked away. Not many people are aware of his line of childrens' books. They aren't very popular. DDL- don't feel bad. ITs better it came from you and not the kids at school. Do what Moose said, that was a good idea, and you can still have alot of fun at Christmas!
Author dropdeadlegs Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 Thanks to everyone for making me feel better. I did reassure her that Christmas will still be just like it always has been. There will still be stockings full of toys and candy, and lots of beautiful packages under the tree. Most of her wish list will be fulfilled. We agreed to keep speaking of Santa because of my son. She seemed okay by the time we finished our talk, I just felt so badly about the big letdown. This year she wanted to make brownies for Santa, and if she still wants to do that, we will. We will continue our traditions. I know everyone who believed at one time does not feel any long term ill effects from learning the truth. At least I don't have any.
Moose Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 This year she wanted to make brownies for Santa, and if she still wants to do that, we will.Just a thought, but why not make her feel like she's reached a point a passage? What I mean is that, since she's 10, and she knows the truth, her act of making the brownies to her is an act of remberance, to her sibling(s) though, it's a lesson in progress....and to just play along.....(not lie, just don't offer the truth right away)....
sb129 Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 I actually can't remember when I found out the truth. No traumatic memories though.... (either that or they are repressed!) Just kidding. She may feel privileged to be part of keeping the secret going for the sake of her younger brother too, so get her involved in that. (Think that may be what Moose meant?) If not, I like brownies, and I can come round, dress up as Santa, and eat them if you want.
Moose Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 (Think that may be what Moose meant?)Right on!
sb129 Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 (Think that may be what Moose meant?)Right on! YAY! We agree! PS... sorry you got the brunt of PMS-sb129 the other day. oops.
burning 4 revenge Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 Yes but I don't think DDL got it I just can picture Nietzche dressed up as Santa with a crying German boy on his lap, " The north pole is ice and nothingness! I can only give you what you want if what you want is ice and nothingness!"
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