mumof5 Posted December 9, 2007 Posted December 9, 2007 Hi I'm new here, I have read a lot of storys about infidelity and I'm trying to understand why but i just can't get there yet....heres my story Found out a month ago that my H of 15years was seeing OW, he went away to his friends 30th Bday for the weekend and I was fine with that (I stay home with the kids and we just had a baby) He let me know when he arrived there and called me later on that night but the next day he turned his phone off and we didn't hear from him for 2days. He got home and said that his phone went dead and he was sorry for not calling. A week later he works nightshift so the following Saturday morning when he was suppose to come home he rang me 4am (knew i would be up feeding baby) said a few of the guys from work are heading out to the pub and he wont be back until later, i said no come home i have the flu been up all night with baby, he said no I'm going out and turned off his phone again. Came home Monday afternoon said to me the he is moving out Friday. I said Why because i want too. Couldn't give any other reason just said give me a month to get my head around thing, I was so mad how could he do this to us, to the kids.I said don't wait until then get your s**t and get out. So he moved in with his cousin down the road but he was coming and going for a month, said he was coming home to spend time with the kids during the week and weekend we wont see him, can't contact him until Monday night. He swear to me that there wasn't anyone else, he just need time. Our cell phone bill arrives and it is way over $500 wtf so i ring the number that he has been calling for the past month and ask for my H and "she" said its for you....He see my number and hangs up. So i ring back say wtf is going on why are you with my H, do you know that we have been M for 15years with 5 kids and the youngest is only 2 months old. Yes she knew that and didn't give a F***. I tell him that me and the kids are leaving and moving over seas, he comes home and begs us to stay, i ask him alot of questions and he telling me everything that i ask but man it hurts hearing thing but i need to know. I get him to ring her and tell her that we are trying to make it work and to leave us alone, but she keeps ringing and textin him, and ring and textin me, so i talk to her asking her why? she said she couldn't help her self. She said that I'm only young (30) i can find someone else let her have my H, (she is early 40's) i said get over yourself I'm not going to give up on this R so she said she would back off and let us be, but as soon as she gets off the phone with me she txt my H saying i dont want him, she wants him, I'm two face please come back to her blah blah blah. She thought that he was at work but he took a few days off so we could work things out and she didn't know that he was with me when i was on the ph to her or i was next to him when she txt. She even had the nerve to txt my oldest daughter phone "please tell your dad to ring me" (she must of got it off his phone). That was a few months ago and she still wont get the hint, just when I think that we can get through time she has to pop up again. Now I now it takes 2 and believe me he is still trying to make it up to me and the kids. But I know we can make this work, if she will just leave us alone. I just don't know how they could do this, why don't they think about the people they are hurting. The W and Kids!!!!
Blue Eyed Brain Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 It's a selfish move, nothing to do with the W and kids. It's about them. Don't worry about her. Pay attention to the reason why he went to someone else for love, compassion, intimacy and then work it out to keep your marriage. Remember: It's not where they are at, it's where they want to be.
whichwayisup Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 IF she continues to call and harrass you, let alone call your daughter and bother her, don't think twice about calling the police and getting a restraining order. She's showing freaky behaviour and you need to protect yourself and your kids from her... I do hope your husband is NOT in contact with her - And I also hope you two are going to counselling.
Author mumof5 Posted December 10, 2007 Author Posted December 10, 2007 Thanks for your reply guys He said he didn't know why he done it, but she was total the opposite to me she drank, i didn't, she smoked, i didn't. I put my kids first to everything she didn't (she has four kids of her own). I told my H that I'm sick of her contacting us and I want all of our cellphone number changed and he was fine with that. So today we changed them all three phone numbers so she wont be ringing or txtin anyone. Yes that was agreed on both of us to go to counseling and figure out what was going wrong in our M. I think part of it was that we were growing apart and we need to get spark back into our M. I have been with him since I was 16 and he was 19.
cj1988 Posted December 10, 2007 Posted December 10, 2007 You see what cheaters do.....they go into an A thinking no one will find out and or they do not care.....next thing you know, they are begging YOU to stay and finding out the OW is a crazy and SCARY on top it.....I hope it all works for you and your family.....give him a chance to do the right thing and slap some good loving on him and all he will think about is YOU again ! You are a good woman for taking him back, but a better one for not killing her ! LOL
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