michael d Posted December 9, 2007 Posted December 9, 2007 aloha guys and gals. thanks for listening. here's an update on my situation. posted 2 weeks ago about my longtime wife moving out saying she wants to be on her own for a while. now she has been seeing some guy already.... to what extent i don't know.... but probably sleeping with him i can only assume. naturally i went and got the divorce papers all ready to file. but she is not ready for a divorce. why rush it she says...i'm not ready she says. she just is spinning out and half of me says, file the papers man! the other half says, ride it out , see what develops and be there for her in this crisis because she says she just doesn't know. am i a fool to sit by and be patient with her or should i end this marriage now? not sure if i could even take her back after that anyway.....wow i'm confused. would appreciate feedback. mike d
Tripper Posted December 9, 2007 Posted December 9, 2007 now she has been seeing some guy already.... to what extent i don't know.... but probably sleeping with him i can only assume. naturally i went and got the divorce papers all ready to file. but she is not ready for a divorce. why rush it she says...i'm not ready she says. she just is spinning out and half of me says, file the papers man! the other half says, ride it out , Hi Michael, Sorry you have to go through this. When my wife and I separated (we did divorce eventually) we set up ground rules and one of them was NO DATING. The idea was to "have space" while we thought through the issues. It sounds like she wants to play the field and if things don't work out she wants to be able to come back to the safety net you provide with marriage. In other words have her cake and eat it too. Unacceptable. If it were my decision, I would file the divorce papers. It's one thing to separate but a whole other issue to start dating and possibly sleeping with someone else. Whatever you decide, make sure it's for you since she's only thinking of herself. And good luck...
LakesideDream Posted December 9, 2007 Posted December 9, 2007 Michael, I agree with Tripper. If you and your wife seperated so she could have "space" (usually code for I have found a new penis I am interested in), and she is in fact test riding a new phallus.. it's time to file your papers. This will accomplish two things. 1: it will let her know you are serious and that if she wants the marriage to work... she will get serious, just as you are. 2: If one isn't the case, you will begin restarting your life at the soonest possible time. Test drivers erk me.
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