sunnyaurora Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 I had been dating my boyfriend for 3 months officially, 5 really. I dated two other guys in my life, both for 9ish months. I ended up having to dump them for various reasons, but in both cases the feelings were pretty dull on both ends. This time though, I had been dating a boy I was madly in love with. We had amazing times together and I was always happiest around him. Right after one month of dating he dumped because my feelings were too intense for his, but then the next morning he changed his mind and I took him back without a second of thought. Now exactly two months later, he dumped me again. This time was over text at school. I was crying through all my classes and went home hysterical. I hoped so badly we would reunite soon, just as we had last time. He didn't give me a very deep explanation. He said he was unhappy and often stressed but it was him, not me. But he still wanted to be best friends. That was on Wednesday. Now Saturday things haven't gotten much easier. I cry for hours everyday and everything reminds me of him. I haven't been able to eat and this concerns me greatly. We still talk sometimes. Yesterday he came over for an hour and we went for a walk and talked and I got a bit of closure. He even gave me a big hug. That was the only time I've been happy since Tuesday. I miss us so incredibly much and would do absolutely anything for us to get back together. I know what he did to me was bad but we have had so many amazing times together, I just can't let them go. I want to hope we get back together but he doesn't think it is likely. He seems sad deep down but has been distracting himself like crazy and avoiding me. Also, I am terrified he will go back to his ex (whom he dated for nearly a year and a half). She is much uglier than me and is a nasty bitch. But i know some guys like girls who take charge and treat them badly, and maybe he is one of them. According to my friend he was texting her and flirting with her yesterday in class, but I also can't take everything this friend says for absolute truth. I miss us so much I could die. Everything reminds me of him and when I dream it is all about him. What should I do? Also do you think there is any chance he will want me back? If so when?
kymberann Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 I know you miss the "us" part of it. But do you really want to get back with this guy who treated you so hot and cold? THis can be really painful to go through and the pain can be so immense that we would rather slip back in to the comfort of the relationship or the presence with that person than work through what the reasons could be that it didn't work. That makes it difficult to let go and move forward. Just give yourself time to grieve, cry, feel desperate and at a loss, because that is what it is. As for him going back to his ex, if he does then that's his issue. Most likely what will happen is that whatever reasons they are exes will happen again. Hang in there, this does make us stronger. Best, Kim
Author sunnyaurora Posted December 8, 2007 Author Posted December 8, 2007 Thanks for your reply Kim. =] See he was only hot and cold sometimes. He was amazing others. This past weekend we spent it all together and had a fantastic time. Every second was amazing. I have been crying for so long and I am scared for myself. I can't concentrate on school work, can't eat, can't even think rationally. I also miss him as a friend. He said he wanted to be friends but he hasn't contacted me without me doing so first. I just can't do the NC like a lot of people on here. We play games together online and see each other everyday at school. It is torture.
Author sunnyaurora Posted December 9, 2007 Author Posted December 9, 2007 Anyone else have advice? I really need it.
countingufosagain Posted December 9, 2007 Posted December 9, 2007 I know this is a difficult time for you, but spending time with him is only prolonging the agony. People are with each other for many different reasons and a person being attractive or the lack there of, are irrelevant. Take this time to work on yourself and if he should decide to re-establish a romantic relationship, the ball will be in your court. No matter how you look at a break up I think NC is the way to go for healing or possible reconciliation. I wish you the best and don't be available to pal around or he will never feel the loss of someone who really cares for him.
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