haley121 Posted December 7, 2007 Posted December 7, 2007 Not sure how many of you read my other post, but basically, for the past month and a half I've been dating my ex. He was with another girl in-between me, and he wasn't completely over her which led to a lot of confusion for both of us. Just recently we decided to go on a 6 week break, so, we could both figure things out. We decided on no contact (no phone calls, no e-mails, nothing), not even for Christmas or my birthday. This was extremely hard for both of us, as we have never gone more than two weeks without talking (and even that was just once), but we decided we had to go through with it for our own individual sakes and for the sake of a possible future relationship. This may just be a common sense thing, but are there dos and don'ts as far as breaks go? Any coping methods? Should I sort of pretend it's a break up or should I treat it differently? Basically, I'm just looking for advice/encouragement because it's been a really rough day. Any responses would be great.
kymberann Posted December 7, 2007 Posted December 7, 2007 Sorry it's been a rough day for you. I hate how those go, especially when in these situations. As for the break, what are you hoping to gain from it? Time for him to get over the ex? What was his view on the break? If it were me I would consider it a break up, that way I won't get my hopes up if after the six weeks it is decided to not get back together. Not really answering your question, but hope it gives you some direction. Best.
Author haley121 Posted December 7, 2007 Author Posted December 7, 2007 Thanks for the response. As far as how we're viewing the break... mainly it's just a chance to clear our heads, so, we can make a rational decision about where things are going. We started dating pretty soon after he ended things with his ex, so, there was a lot of confusion there on his part, more than I realized at the time. He said he plans to cut off all contact with her for good, and then spend the next weeks getting over her completely and figuring out how he feels about me and our situation. For me, sometimes I wonder if I just want to be with him because I'm afraid to let him go, so, this will help me see if that's the case or not. Also, I want to give him time to get over the ex, figure out about me, etc.
Da_1_n_OnlyN3na Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 im am on a break also.. for 3 weeks..theres one week to go..this was because of my jealousy issues which were stressing him out and needed space for himself...i havent talked to him on the phone or even in person until today whe he called me... it is hard not to see each other because we go to the same school have similar friends and we see each other at lunch every day...but what i have been doing is pretending were broken up..because that way i dont get hopes of him coming back and i dont look so deppressed waiting like a dumbass for that day to come...it would be easier for you since probably you dont see him much so you can be more calm and not think of him so much..unlike me i see him everyday just we dont talk... i dont believe in breaks and this is my first time i ever have been on a break....but as far as i have read breaks can be beneficial for your future relationship but can also completely end it...during a break if anyone of you talk to other people then you can compare, nd you can find out if you or him actually want to go back toguether..but the more time it takes the farther it can pull you guys apart..to the point where u get used to not being with that person and you dont feel the need to go back...i have been working on many issues i had and trust me i realise now everything i have been doing wrong...i feel like if we get back everything is going to be like it was supposed to be...you bf or x bf...could be using this time to put his feelings in order...if he misses what you guys had he will come back nd start fresh with you...forget the past and start over...breaks are a biitch because i didnt even noe what to do lol...i didnt know how to act or what to say lol...so i understand you...nd i hope everything goes well....just remember...if you guys are meant to be.. he will come back and everything will be ok...good luck..
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