FoodStamp Posted December 7, 2007 Posted December 7, 2007 Ok. So hello every one. I'm new, love the fact there is a place where these questions can see the light of day and I do not have to show my bashful face in the process. These are the Circumstances: I'm 25, she's 23. we have known of each other for about 6 years, but never spent any real time together. Now were both back home and I ended up running into her a couple weeks ago. We are out at a bar and, (we share mutual friends) , and I ended up over at a booth with her and her mother. Nice woman. she's trying to figure out where she knows me from, the mom, and we get to talking... all of us... two hours go by, were having a blast just bull****ting. active dialogue between all three of us. A couple of the times i would look over at the daughter, she would be looking at me. So I thought, good sign.. After were done talking my ride is about to leave, so i excuse my self to go and daughter stops me and says" ehy i had an awesome time with you tonight, we should hang out soon, whats your phone number. I give her my number give her a hug goodbye, then went and gave mom a hug goodbye and left. That weekend I caught the flue, she did call me on sat. night and wanted to hang out. informed her and she offered to come help me , which i thankfully declined. I call her back Sunday, to say hello. and she wants to hang out still. So that was a week and a half ago. She comes over one evening, and of course i have three guys in my apartment, one of which i don't know. we sat around and watched tv, smoked a bowl hung out. I felt bad because i didn't have much of an opportunity to talk to her. learn more about her. we talk but just more me trying to get her to laugh. I wanted to talk more. So the night ends, she goes home, I walked outside after her and started to light a cigarette and she hadn't left yet. So, I waled over to the car as she was pulling out and said again that i was glad she came over and I would call her later. She said all right and started to drive off, but she left the car in reverse. it was funny so i laughed I think she was embarrassed. I texted her later and apologized for the people being there, she said no worries and she had a good time. I'm doubting this the whole time by the way, i cant tell if she is just being polite or what. So we made plans again to see eachother and she comes over to my appartment this time with her dog., Puppy 2 months., I have a 2 year old AM bulldog, and we figured they could play, Oh thats the other thing, my dog is completely calm around Daughter, usually she goes ape**** around people . so the dogs end up getting along and they're playing. We go between inside and out. watching the dogs and sitting on the couch talking. being the retard that I am i pull down a photo album to show her pictures of other dogs that my family has and start flipping through pages. other picture come up and then I get this overwhelming feeling of retardation, like why the hell would she have interest in seeing these? and slam the book shut and get up to put it away. I'm real comfortable with her. When we talk to eachother I feel as though we have been at least dating for a year. It feels natural talking to her i think is what im trying to say. So daughter is hungry and all i have is leftover Chinese. she wanted doritos but i didn't have any food, except Chinese, so i asked if she like the spice and she did , so I heated up Chinese(one day old) and she mowed it. I felt so bad i had nothing else. after she ate and while were on the couch she would use her hand to either adjsut the strap of her top or rubbing her shoulder, either way she exposed skin, whether voluntary or not i don't know. but it caught my attention. Then the dogs are playing around, I take her plate back into the kitchen and at one point I look back into the family room I see her kinda stretching and her shirt came up exposing her stomack and the small of her back. Very sexy.. but she wasn't making sure i could see. or was she? also when we are on the couch she would get up and turn around to look over the back of the couch and stick her butt out right in front of me. I i weren't so petrified to touch her I would have smacked it( as a tease) I could look at her for hours. I read somewhere on here that small physical contact like hair behind the ear is good, or a hug or ,.. i don't know. But i don't want to push her away. She wants to come over again tonight and she is bringing the dog over too. I was thingking of going shopping for some board games and burning some music for the drive to the store, that way i can see what kinda music she likes, and we can have something to do tonight. I like this girl a lot. I do not casually date because I'm a pussy more than anything else, but also I don't see the point of practicing with other peoples emotions if I don't think it can be long term. Daughter is going back to finish school in Jan and i would imagine be back after the semester. I would like to get to know this girl and build a relationship with her. My fear is I won't be aggressive enough now and loose her later. I don't want to start being touchy feely and her get turned off because I want her to know I like her a lot. And I don't want her to get the wrong Idea and think I only want to be her friend. Because thats not the case. My questions: Girls, what are signs that you give when you want a guy to get closer, What should be happening between us if she does have interest in me. I haven't dated since my junior year of Highschool and that one pretty much fell into my lap. I have no idea what the fu$% I'm doing. What are appropriate topics to talk about when you first start seeing each other, hanging out.? I am an open book. sometimes not the best thing but i feel its best to be honest. Sometimes I'm witty about it and other times I could fill the sails of a 1700's warship. I talk about anything, But not everyone is like that, so where do i start, family, school? dreams? fantasy's, fears, memories, what... Sorry for the long post I hope there is some advice out there for me. Thank you!
mattea Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 My questions: Girls, what are signs that you give when you want a guy to get closer, What should be happening between us if she does have interest in me. I haven't dated since my junior year of Highschool and that one pretty much fell into my lap. I have no idea what the fu$% I'm doing. What are appropriate topics to talk about when you first start seeing each other, hanging out.? I am an open book. sometimes not the best thing but i feel its best to be honest. Sometimes I'm witty about it and other times I could fill the sails of a 1700's warship. I talk about anything, But not everyone is like that, so where do i start, family, school? dreams? fantasy's, fears, memories, what... Sorry for the long post I hope there is some advice out there for me. Thank you! hey foodstamp. you say you don't know what you're doing but it sounds to me like you're doing just fine! by now the two of you are probably hanging out again since you said she was coming over again so you'll have to keep us filled in to me she seems to be giving lots of signs that i would give if i was into a guy. initiating contact and wanting to hang out and telling you what a good time she has with you. those are all good signs! when i'm into a guy i will touch him on the arm or something when we talk and sit close and compliment him on things i like about him and smile a lot. does she do those things? or do you do those things with her and if so how does she react? nobody can be a great conversationalist all the time, and if you're nervous that makes it tougher. but you said yourself it is so easy to talk to her and you're so comfortable you feel as if you've already been dating awhile. so go with that. don't stress to much about what you talk about - just try to let it be natural. tell stories about your youth or places you've been and she'll probably share some too. ask about her family. talk about what you like or dislike about school or work. talk about your interests. sometimes it's better to keep really personal things to yourself for awhile, as to not put her in a position of feeling uncomfortable in knowing how to respond. best of luck and keep us updated. it really really sounds to me like she's into you!
Touche Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 Well, the first thing I'd do is stop calling her "Daughter." That was a little unsettling...or maybe it's just me. Also, not a good idea to have her come over and "smoke a bowl" and let her get in her car where she drives in reverse instead of forward. And lastly, if she's rubbing up on you, and exposing her body parts as well as sticking her butt in your face, uhm...well, something tells me you don't need to worry about what to talk about with her.
Author FoodStamp Posted December 8, 2007 Author Posted December 8, 2007 Yea I was writing franticly at work trying to get out of there. And I was trying to go with the whole anonymity.. thing. You think so? she does like me,? Ok. so she's showing skin and flaunting. so if its being offered is it ok to just cuddle with her and kiss. or is she going to want more. I guess if it gets to that I can handle it right? but Ok, we did see each other this evening. I was with friends at the bar and she texted me asking what i was doing. told her and she asks me to come hang out. Oh. the weed thing. yea she isnt a rookie, definately has some tolerance. I dont want anyone getting the wrong impression like im trying to drug her. So anyhow I go over we hug imediately and it was a nice hug. I felt though out the entire evening she was more flirty like our hug. she hugs me around my neck not my stomach. so we go inside play with the dogs. and just laying around talking . Her sister is on the couch passed out by the way, . Not a big deal though. drinking since one pm. So we move to a chair thats big enough for the two of us, oh and she invited me to come sit with her. so we sit, I didn't want to put my arm around her, I just didn't feel comfortable, again i don't want to push and the on dog keeps coming up with a ball, so I took it and played with him, using her and my leg to keep it hidden, trying to do the little touches, then we at one point have our hands pressed against each others, I was talking about my little hands, and surprisingly hers are smaller. but yea I didn't hold her hand, and i think i should have. but we continue to talk actually a lot. More laying on the chair,.. our legs stayed together the whole time. (sorry if this stuff doesn't matter, but i don't want to leave anything out. .. but her body didn't meet mine. I figured if she wanted to be close that she would kinda slip on over, but it turned into her arm on top of mine. then we just kinda did nothing... and i liked it very much, So its now 2:30 and i should be going to bed, I tell her im gonna take off, and im over top of her, just staring.. She is beautiful by the way. and I felt like i could have kissed her right there. but i didnt. I was scared again that thats not what she may have wanted. SO we go outside to have a final cigarrett and earlier we had talked about going shopping tomorrow, or today i should say for Xmas so she is going to call me in the morning when she gets up. Well as I was leaving she said "oh Im excited to go shopping tomorrow, you better put your gay face on." I'm like WTF does she think I'm gay now? So... If thats her saying im gay , like she has tried everything to get me to jump her and I haven't he must be gay type deal I'll lay it on her first thing in the morning. But how the hell do you know! Am i blind? should I say I like her first or kiss her, or send a memo what. Oh, I also gave her a tinny massage. actually more like me pressing fingers into her back but hey it was for a long period of time and ,, The more I write this the more retarted I feel for not doing more tonight. Tell me what you guys think? thank you for responding too!
Author FoodStamp Posted December 8, 2007 Author Posted December 8, 2007 hey foodstamp. you say you don't know what you're doing but it sounds to me like you're doing just fine! by now the two of you are probably hanging out again since you said she was coming over again so you'll have to keep us filled in to me she seems to be giving lots of signs that i would give if i was into a guy. initiating contact and wanting to hang out and telling you what a good time she has with you. those are all good signs! when i'm into a guy i will touch him on the arm or something when we talk and sit close and compliment him on things i like about him and smile a lot. does she do those things? or do you do those things with her and if so how does she react? nobody can be a great conversationalist all the time, and if you're nervous that makes it tougher. but you said yourself it is so easy to talk to her and you're so comfortable you feel as if you've already been dating awhile. so go with that. don't stress to much about what you talk about - just try to let it be natural. tell stories about your youth or places you've been and she'll probably share some too. ask about her family. talk about what you like or dislike about school or work. talk about your interests. sometimes it's better to keep really personal things to yourself for awhile, as to not put her in a position of feeling uncomfortable in knowing how to respond. best of luck and keep us updated. it really really sounds to me like she's into you! She doesnt really touch me, except for the hand, She put hers on mine. When i do touch her she doesn't back away. its like she doesnt care. There were two times the dog toy was between her legs and i grabbed it. not being perverted, just enough contact that I could get the ball but still touching her. It was by no means sexual, at least for me, was she leaving it there for me?
Touche Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 Yea I was writing franticly at work trying to get out of there. And I was trying to go with the whole anonymity.. thing. You think so? she does like me,? Ok. so she's showing skin and flaunting. so if its being offered is it ok to just cuddle with her and kiss. or is she going to want more. I guess if it gets to that I can handle it right? but Ok, we did see each other this evening. I was with friends at the bar and she texted me asking what i was doing. told her and she asks me to come hang out. Oh. the weed thing. yea she isnt a rookie, definately has some tolerance. I dont want anyone getting the wrong impression like im trying to drug her. So anyhow I go over we hug imediately and it was a nice hug. I felt though out the entire evening she was more flirty like our hug. she hugs me around my neck not my stomach. so we go inside play with the dogs. and just laying around talking . Her sister is on the couch passed out by the way, . Not a big deal though. drinking since one pm. So we move to a chair thats big enough for the two of us, oh and she invited me to come sit with her. so we sit, I didn't want to put my arm around her, I just didn't feel comfortable, again i don't want to push and the on dog keeps coming up with a ball, so I took it and played with him, using her and my leg to keep it hidden, trying to do the little touches, then we at one point have our hands pressed against each others, I was talking about my little hands, and surprisingly hers are smaller. but yea I didn't hold her hand, and i think i should have. but we continue to talk actually a lot. More laying on the chair,.. our legs stayed together the whole time. (sorry if this stuff doesn't matter, but i don't want to leave anything out. .. but her body didn't meet mine. I figured if she wanted to be close that she would kinda slip on over, but it turned into her arm on top of mine. then we just kinda did nothing... and i liked it very much, So its now 2:30 and i should be going to bed, I tell her im gonna take off, and im over top of her, just staring.. She is beautiful by the way. and I felt like i could have kissed her right there. but i didnt. I was scared again that thats not what she may have wanted. SO we go outside to have a final cigarrett and earlier we had talked about going shopping tomorrow, or today i should say for Xmas so she is going to call me in the morning when she gets up. Well as I was leaving she said "oh Im excited to go shopping tomorrow, you better put your gay face on." I'm like WTF does she think I'm gay now? So... If thats her saying im gay , like she has tried everything to get me to jump her and I haven't he must be gay type deal I'll lay it on her first thing in the morning. But how the hell do you know! Am i blind? should I say I like her first or kiss her, or send a memo what. Oh, I also gave her a tinny massage. actually more like me pressing fingers into her back but hey it was for a long period of time and ,, The more I write this the more retarted I feel for not doing more tonight. Tell me what you guys think? thank you for responding too! Uhm, I don't think she said "You better put your gay face on." She probably said "You better put your GAME face on." It means that you should be at your best. She wasn't trying to tell you that you're gay, ok? Also, you should kiss her already. She's sending you enough signals. But only do so when you're comfortable and not before. Good luck.
Leoni Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 A "gay face" is a good idea for shopping but not so good to get close to someone of the opposite gender. I agree with Touche.
Touche Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 A "gay face" is a good idea for shopping but not so good to get close to someone of the opposite gender. I agree with Touche. :lmao: Yes, and a gay face is good too because when you carry her shopping bags, no one will look at you funny.
Leoni Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 :lmao: Yes, and a gay face is good too because when you carry her shopping bags, no one will look at you funny. It's nice when a guy can also carry your purse. This way, you can have both hands free to look for sizes.
Touche Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 It's nice when a guy can also carry your purse. This way, you can have both hands free to look for sizes. So true, I hadn't thought of that. A gay face can certainly come in handy in many instances.
Leoni Posted December 8, 2007 Posted December 8, 2007 So true, I hadn't thought of that. A gay face can certainly come in handy in many instances. Most definitely. I wouldn't recommend allowing her to try makeup on you but the rest is great. I personally like to drag a new b/f around for hours and hours of fun shopping. It lets us get to know each other and allows me to see how much stress he can handle. Good luck.
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