forbidden fruit Posted December 6, 2007 Posted December 6, 2007 A quick update. I have been NC for two months now. Most of the time it has been easy, but the last couple of days have been extremely hard because xmm has not been at work. I flipped him off when he was in front of me in his car. I could not help the anger took over me( I know very immature) and yesterday I left a short message to return something that was mine. No emotion, but i do not want to have anything that is mine including my kids. I have halted all playdates with my kids and his kids. Just seeing his W or kids reminds me of him and I am still not over this whole thing yet. He tries to say hello to me and I know he wants to be friends, but all I want to do is run away from him. It is the worse having your xmm living next door to you. the saying out of sight out of mind is never more true in my case and boy do I wish he was out of sight. Side note he has been spending alot of time with another woman neighbor either to get me jealous so I will react or because he is out for some new narcissitic supply. Either way it is not easy to watch, but I guess I should be glad I am not married to him.
LucreziaBorgia Posted December 6, 2007 Posted December 6, 2007 I don't see this as a step backward, so much as I see these things as tiny painful steps forward. Just keep going forward. It is hard to walk away, and even harder when you have a guy like this right up in your face every day.
EnigmaXOXO Posted December 6, 2007 Posted December 6, 2007 Side note he has been spending a lot of time with another woman neighbor either to get me jealous so I will react or because he is out for some new narcissistic supply. Either way it is not easy to watch, but I guess I should be glad I am not married to him. I don’t think it’s a step backwards, either. You’re finally starting to see this fake-ayas Romeo for who he really is. HALLALUYA! This is what makes following all these tragic stories so worth while ... to watch from beginning to end as a fellow female gradually recognizes her own power and self-worth and begins to take her own life back. Maybe I’ve just been on this forum waaaay too long, but I’ve seen it happen all the time. People seldom leave as the same person they were when they first came in. And that’s what makes sticking around so worth while. I heard it said once that the true measure of a person is not how many times they get knocked down, but how many times they find the courage to get back up. I kinda like that. So the next time you get the urge to flip the bird at some jerk or jerkette who screwed with your life ... do it twice for those of us who remember back to a time when they wished they had chutzpa to do the same.
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