patwheel Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 It's really not worth it....and here's why. Dated this girl for about 4 months, relationship was great, up until the point where we both had to deal with a lot. For her, starting law school, me getting my bar. We parted ways, and I've never contacted her since. On her side, on the other hand, she kept calling me to ask how I was, but I would never reply to her messages or call her back...up until I've hit the rock bottom of my love life, about 7 months later of NC from my side. We meet up, we explain each other about what happened, kiss and the roller coaster starts. We didnt end in bad terms, just broke all contact on my side, cause i didnt see what it would bring to my life, and frankly, i dont see her as a friend. But, when you see your ex again, all of the emotions come back to life, all that passion that was there comes back, and you start imagining yourself with that person again. About a week later, she tells me she has a guy that she is sorta dating, 2 months, brand new, and that she cant do anything with me, but plays the friend card. I reject it, tell her not to contact me. Of course, she does, and I ask her what she wants from me... Typical reply, "I dont want anything from you, I just care for you and therefore want to be there, as a friend". I told her, I dont need her friendship, I have friends, thank you, but no thanks. She replies "I just want to see you", and then she proceeded to come over. We had sex. Next day, she texts me to tell me she regrets, cant do this to her guy, and wont contact me, but will tell me as soon as she is single. Of course, I didnt reply to this. But, you see guys, going back to your exes means just one thing: circle around the same thing, and same issues that were there before or just plain asking for an emotional grave to be dug up. In my case, she is not available and it might have worked if she wasa, but I seriously doubt that she and I changed and make enough time to have a relationship. But one thing that this little episode did, was rub her ego ( since she saw that she could have me back), and put me at her feet (do you actually think ill be waiting for you?). I made the mistake to contact her back, and I will never ever try again with an ex. Yes, sometimes it does work, and we all have seen the hollywood movies, or heard the sayign that if it comes back, it must be the one one, but be realistic, and face the truth: an ex is an ex for a reason. So man up! Stand for yourself, don't let your self esteem be hurt, and think of it as a learning experience. Concentrate on yourself, make yourself better and we will all find the right one...one day or another.
kitkat289 Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 thanks a lot Patwheel.Every night I start to miss my ex and wonder if there'll be any second chance, I start reminding myself of all these stories on LS, the bad experiences of people who try for a second chance. It generally ends up telling you the same thing all over again that "an ex in an ex for a reason!!" I will try reminding myself every day and even when he comes back,tries to ask me to meet.... Iam preparing myself to deal with that situation when my desires would overtake me,my dignity again.In no way Iam gonna let him make situations according to his own convenience no matter what it takes!
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