goodguy15 Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 I mean is it really true that women use guys as an emotional object?Say for instance my girlfriend loves to cuddle with me but the only problem is that I feel like a back rest of a chair when she leans up against my chest and I can't hardly breath.And that day I told her I might move in a couple of years and she got mad at me for say 30 mins and I took her off gaurd.She told me I don't mean to sound bitchy and selfish and I'm just afraid to lose you but then I told her it could happen what if we're not engaged and can't live together when that time comes.I mean come on am I like the only guy in this world.It was getting silly how she reacted.
Lauriebell82 Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 I mean is it really true that women use guys as an emotional object?Say for instance my girlfriend loves to cuddle with me but the only problem is that I feel like a back rest of a chair when she leans up against my chest and I can't hardly breath.And that day I told her I might move in a couple of years and she got mad at me for say 30 mins and I took her off gaurd.She told me I don't mean to sound bitchy and selfish and I'm just afraid to lose you but then I told her it could happen what if we're not engaged and can't live together when that time comes.I mean come on am I like the only guy in this world.It was getting silly how she reacted. Dude, I really think you need to dump this girl. You get upset at her for valid things that she does. She doesn't want to lose you because you loves you..why the heck would that piss you off???? And the back rest of a chair? Come on, she loves you and wants to cuddle, give her a freaking break!!!!! It sounds like you are feeling smothered by your gf because you don't love her the way she loves you. If you did, none of these issues would bother you. Break up with her so she can find somoene who does love her!
PerfectLee Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 Girls become very emotionally invested, and sounds like your gf is trying to hang on to you in fear she could possibly lose you. Regardless if she loses you in a week, or 1 year, it doesn't matter. Girls need to know that you are just as emotionally invested as they are. According to us, girls have much more to lose. Every part of us, body & soul is given to you and girls tend to come off as dramatic, oversensitive bitchy people when they feel just slightly emotionally unstable. We don't like surprises like "Hey, check out the game on tv. Oh, by the way, in a few years we may or may not be together cuz I gotta move. Hey baby-how was your day?" You guys just need to talk.
sally4sara Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 I'm not sure.....but is this post just a comical retort to a woman asking "It is true that all men just use women for sex?" I hope so cause I sure laughed when I read it!
Author goodguy15 Posted November 30, 2007 Author Posted November 30, 2007 Girls become very emotionally invested, and sounds like your gf is trying to hang on to you in fear she could possibly lose you. Regardless if she loses you in a week, or 1 year, it doesn't matter. Girls need to know that you are just as emotionally invested as they are. According to us, girls have much more to lose. Every part of us, body & soul is given to you and girls tend to come off as dramatic, oversensitive bitchy people when they feel just slightly emotionally unstable. We don't like surprises like "Hey, check out the game on tv. Oh, by the way, in a few years we may or may not be together cuz I gotta move. Hey baby-how was your day?" You guys just need to talk. I didn't mean to come out the way i said it it just came out wrong what was I supposed to do not tell her at all and when it does happen she'll be even more upset than she was on that day when i told her.I just wanted to get it out in the open.And she was telling me if we do get engaged and we'll move in together but why does she think that's going to happen anyways.It's just crazy in my opinion a lot of things could happen between now and then and she doesn't want to throw it all down the drain and then she makes me feel guilty and even more vulnerable.It just feels like I can't say anything to her without making her upset, it's just ridiculous.
Lauriebell82 Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 I didn't mean to come out the way i said it it just came out wrong what was I supposed to do not tell her at all and when it does happen she'll be even more upset than she was on that day when i told her.I just wanted to get it out in the open.And she was telling me if we do get engaged and we'll move in together but why does she think that's going to happen anyways. You either gave her the idea that you guys would one day get engaged or married, or she assumed. Either way, you better set the girl straight that you arent thinking about anything like that. I don't think your being fair to her..it sounds like she wants things that you don't want to give her. And you are letting it happen, so in my mind that's really crappy of you.
Author goodguy15 Posted November 30, 2007 Author Posted November 30, 2007 I didn't mean to come out the way i said it it just came out wrong what was I supposed to do not tell her at all and when it does happen she'll be even more upset than she was on that day when i told her.I just wanted to get it out in the open.And she was telling me if we do get engaged and we'll move in together but why does she think that's going to happen anyways. You either gave her the idea that you guys would one day get engaged or married, or she assumed. Either way, you better set the girl straight that you arent thinking about anything like that. I don't think your being fair to her..it sounds like she wants things that you don't want to give her. And you are letting it happen, so in my mind that's really crappy of you. Well, when we first met she had no idea I was going to date her and all this.Then i told her I loved her when she was joking with me then I had no idea that she was joking with me.And on New years Eve I told her that I did because I felt it at the time.And now people are telling us are you getting married constantly and it was scaring both of us because we're not anywhere near ready for that kind of stage.We're just taking it a day at a time.And plus I got laid off two jobs in the past year because of lack of work and reduction in production and we're both broke.I never really had anybody love me this much before and still not used to that sort of attention. And telling her whole family and relatives about me things like that.It is a new experience and I'm still trying to comprehend it.
Lauriebell82 Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 Well, if you are BOTH not ready for that, then why are you so upset? Are you scared or something? Cause that is def. going to effect your relationship.
I Luv the Chariot OH Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 Aren't you the same guy who posted five+ threads in a month about how you don't like your girlfriend that much and she's overweight and you are't attracted to her and you don't know how to break up with her?
Lauriebell82 Posted November 30, 2007 Posted November 30, 2007 Aren't you the same guy who posted five+ threads in a month about how you don't like your girlfriend that much and she's overweight and you are't attracted to her and you don't know how to break up with her? Yeah, he is!!! Ironic isn't it?
brothermartin Posted December 1, 2007 Posted December 1, 2007 Dude, is this like the first girlfriend you've ever had or are you just that ignorant to the ways of women?
Author goodguy15 Posted December 1, 2007 Author Posted December 1, 2007 Dude, is this like the first girlfriend you've ever had or are you just that ignorant to the ways of women? No, this is not my first girlfriend.She is my first real relationship that I have ever been on past 15 months.This is like my 5th girlfriend but I did have a 4 year dating drought before I met her.And plus I met some pretty messed up girls that treated me like crap within those 4 years but those girls i didn't date we just hung out and had fun and that was it.Three of them were using me because i had a car and money.They didn't like me for who i was.And I have my girlfriend that I have now she treats me like a human being but i never really had that before until 2 years ago.Because I was too nice and I did drove those girls every where. Oh yeah that's right nice guys finish last that's one the most lamest things I ever heard in my life and it's bullcrap.How am I ever going to meet the girl that I always dreamed of but that won't happen because I can't do any better like some guys do with girls.I'm shy and can't go up to a girl for dance or a drink without being turned down.I am jealous because some guys are lucky to have a sexy woman.
Magnatolia Posted December 1, 2007 Posted December 1, 2007 Dude, you need some serious help as you obviously have no idea how women think at all. To be honest, you come across as having no interest in your gf which begs me to ask why you're even with her. You've basically told her that you're moving and you two won't have a future. And you wonder why she gets upset? Women like to know that what they have is long-term, that's why they plan the future. Sure they know that things change but at least it gives them some kind of plan. Marriage isn't an option now, but why not by the time you move. And you do realise that you can get engaged but not get married right away. Of course there's the option of moving in together but not getting engaged. Women will naturally tell their family about you, it's a normal part of a relationship. No doubt her friends know about you too. You just need to accept these things, don't question them or try and analyze why she did something.
RecordProducer Posted December 1, 2007 Posted December 1, 2007 I mean is it really true that women use guys as an emotional object?Say for instance my girlfriend loves to cuddle with me but the only problem is that I feel like a back rest of a chair when she leans up against my chest and I can't hardly breath.And that day I told her I might move in a couple of years and she got mad at me for say 30 mins and I took her off gaurd.She told me I don't mean to sound bitchy and selfish and I'm just afraid to lose you but then I told her it could happen what if we're not engaged and can't live together when that time comes.I mean come on am I like the only guy in this world.It was getting silly how she reacted.1. Using someone as an emotional object would mean to have someone make you feel good without having any feelings him. If the woman loves you, it's not using. Yes, I am "using" my partners for sex, love, cuddling, money, care, but I love them. My husband is "using" my cooking and laundry skills, too. 2. Your whole post makes little sense. You should work on your ability to express yourself more clearly.... although, we got the point.
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