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I drunk texted the ex


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Posted

I can't believe I broke NC. We aren't even on speaking terms.

 

Last night I went on a date(3rd date) with a girl. We went to see "Love in the time of Cholera"(it's one of my favourite books). It's about a man who waits over 50 years to be with the one he loves....of course along the way he has over 500 carnal relationships.

 

Anyway afterwards we went to bar/lounge that one of my friends owns and drank way too many martinis and mojitos. The girl started kissing me and I felt comfortable with it. Then she wanted me to go back to her place...but I declined b/c I had to work in the morning. So I put her in a cab and I went home myself.

 

For some unknown reason...I text the ex...it was more of a impulse then a need to...here's what I wrote...

 

Just saw the film love in the time of cholera with someone and I thought about you i gave you the book back in 94 i apologize for making you feel guilty but could you please stop making excuses when you apologize to me we both deserve more then that anyway to do no harm treat the cause not the symptom

 

I feel silly for texting her after the last couple of texts

 

her in oct

 

I found the distance too hard. sorry it was hard to not want to see other guys especially since we didn't know the future. thanks for the good times together

 

my response

 

I thought we had a future in that we considered having kids together. I can understand the distance but you cheated before the distance. It was unfair of you. I did nothing to deserve that but I wish you well

 

her early nov

 

Please stop making me feel guilty when I apologize. Just forget about it. I don't want to hear from yu anymore if it is just going to be negative

my response several days later

 

I know your text was meant to be an apology but it came across as a justification for your actions. it doesn't matter anymore. i am happy with the knowledge that you once truly loved me. it washes away the negativity and the memory of your person will linger. thank you

 

 

Why did I even bother. There's really no point to it. Now I come across as a complete ass...if she didn't feel that before. Oh well.

Posted
I can't believe I broke NC. We aren't even on speaking terms.

 

Last night I went on a date(3rd date) with a girl. We went to see "Love in the time of Cholera"(it's one of my favourite books). It's about a man who waits over 50 years to be with the one he loves....of course along the way he has over 500 carnal relationships.

 

Anyway afterwards we went to bar/lounge that one of my friends owns and drank way too many martinis and mojitos. The girl started kissing me and I felt comfortable with it. Then she wanted me to go back to her place...but I declined b/c I had to work in the morning. So I put her in a cab and I went home myself.

 

For some unknown reason...I text the ex...it was more of a impulse then a need to...here's what I wrote...

 

Just saw the film love in the time of cholera with someone and I thought about you i gave you the book back in 94 i apologize for making you feel guilty but could you please stop making excuses when you apologize to me we both deserve more then that anyway to do no harm treat the cause not the symptom

 

I feel silly for texting her after the last couple of texts

 

her in oct

 

I found the distance too hard. sorry it was hard to not want to see other guys especially since we didn't know the future. thanks for the good times together

 

my response

 

I thought we had a future in that we considered having kids together. I can understand the distance but you cheated before the distance. It was unfair of you. I did nothing to deserve that but I wish you well

 

her early nov

 

Please stop making me feel guilty when I apologize. Just forget about it. I don't want to hear from yu anymore if it is just going to be negative

 

my response several days later

 

I know your text was meant to be an apology but it came across as a justification for your actions. it doesn't matter anymore. i am happy with the knowledge that you once truly loved me. it washes away the negativity and the memory of your person will linger. thank you

 

 

Why did I even bother. There's really no point to it. Now I come across as a complete ass...if she didn't feel that before. Oh well.

 

Don't beat yourself up here, we all make mistake's. Do you think she will reply back?

 

AP:)

  • Author
Posted

I highly doubt she will reply

 

It was just silly of me to text her

 

I should have went home with my date

Posted
I should have went home with my date

 

YES.. you should have...

 

You just wasted an opportunity over someone you no longer talk to or have a future with.

You need to remove your Ex's number from your phone...

Posted

Oh well. Who cares what she thinks? Do you? Does it matter what she thinks?

 

Just chalk it up to too many drinks, which it sounds like it was, and let it go as a mistake.

 

Go look up the lyrics to Mika's "Erase" and I'll add your name on the long long list of people who have done the same thing, mine is on the list as well. In the grand scheme of life, it wasn't even as big as a small hiccup.

 

Next time you will do differently.

Posted
I'll add your name on the long long list of people who have done the same thing, mine is on the list as well.

 

So is mine... not the drunk part but the over emotional miss you texting..

 

There isn't one person here that hasn't done it..

Don't let it get you down.. just go out with the girl you went to the movies with again and have a good date with her.. no pressure.

  • Author
Posted

I feel silly for texting her when she doesn't even want to hear from me anymore. It's been 6 mths since the breakup.

 

I hope the ex doesn't respond...I can only imagine what she would say. Now it becomes my fault for contacting her.

 

As for the girl...I'm going out with her tomorrow again

Posted
I feel silly for texting her when she doesn't even want to hear from me anymore. It's been 6 mths since the breakup.

 

I hope the ex doesn't respond...I can only imagine what she would say. Now it becomes my fault for contacting her.

 

As for the girl...I'm going out with her tomorrow again

 

Good for you! Have fun on your date.:)

 

AP:)

Posted

Totally true...have fun. It's water under the bridge.

Posted

There isn't one person here that hasn't done it..

 

I haven't >_> <_< :laugh::laugh::laugh:

 

I have too many times that I lost count. don't feel bad bro, just deal with it and forget about it.

 

And enjoy your next date!!

Posted

On a lighter note, what the hell is a man doing drinking mojitos? :cool:

  • Author
Posted

So I went out with the girl again....it was alright. We went for a hike and grab a bite to eat afterwards.

 

I haven't heard back from the ex since I drunk text her....which is good. I feel embarrassed about the whole thing.

 

I feel idiotic in that she cheated on me

 

...I broke up with her...she's been leaving me alone

 

I've been trying to fix things so that there's no animosity betwn us

 

but everytime I tried...she comes across as not being able to take resposibility for her actions

 

and I get mad b/c of that

 

and now we are at the point where she doesn't want to hear from me anymore

 

...and me drunk texting her is not cool...that's where I feel bad

 

I should just let things go so we can both move on with our lives

 

The ex must think I'm emotionally unstable b/c of my silly behaviour....oh well such is the consequences of love lost

Posted

dont worry about what your ex thinks shes an ex. But work on your own feelings and emotions. Thinking about what she is thinking is holding back your own healing. Its your ego that is making you feel like you do, and not the truth.

Posted

I haven't drunk texted (yet), but I've drunk dialed and drunk emailed more times than I care to admit. Every single time, I've regretted it the next day. :o Hey, we've all done it at some point, try not to beat yourself up about it! I now just make it a rule, if I have a few drinks, I make it a point to tell myself, just wait until tomorrow; if it's such a great idea, it will still be a great idea tomorrow. Of course it never is. One other thing I've found that works is to write the email, but save it as a draft but don't send it. You get your thoughts out, but don't do any damage. Writing a letter and not sending it is a good thing to do anytime when I'm worked up about something, tipsy or not. :)

  • Author
Posted
Its your ego that is making you feel like you do, and not the truth.

 

I think you are right...it is totally my ego that is preventing me from letting it go once and for all.

 

I still can't believe that she cheated on me. I treated her with utmost respect and love and to have her betray me like that just boggles my mind especially when she was the last person I would ever suspect of doing such a horrible thing. I'm trying to fix things and I'm trying to understand...did I get played...was I blinded by love. My ego wants answers and the more I try the more I come off as a goof.

 

It's pride that keeps me stuck in this place b/c I know I will never get an answer or closure from her that will be satisfactory to me.

  • Author
Posted

I just got a text from the ex

 

 

"I'm sad about everything that happened with us. It was so terrible"

 

What does she want?

 

I thought no way she would contact me again...especially after the last couple of text messages

Posted

Maybe ask what do you want?

  • Author
Posted

I thought about it...I don't think I want to reply...it does no one any good

 

"I'm sad about everything that happened with us. It was so terrible"

 

But is she saying that our relationship was terrible....when she says "

 

"everything that happened with us"

Posted

I dunno, it sounds like she is sad about having the relationship. but if you feel that its best not to reply then let it and her go, and carry on working on you. one day you may both be in a better place to communicate, but by that time as with me, new people will be in your life, and you may not want it, or it wont be that important anymore. Sometimes its best to let sleeping dogs lay as it were.

Posted

Hey,

 

"I'm sad about everything that happened with us. It was so terrible"

 

What does she want?

 

-----

 

That means: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, ok? Sorry. Not sure what else to tell you.

 

Ariadne

  • Author
Posted
Hey,

 

"I'm sad about everything that happened with us. It was so terrible"

 

What does she want?

 

-----

 

That means: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, ok? Sorry. Not sure what else to tell you.

 

Ariadne

 

really?

 

I kind of took it as her saying that our entire relationship was wrong and not just our breakup?

 

so you are saying...she is saying she is sad about how it ended.

 

that she regrets how it ended

Posted

what do you want from this? If its closure forget it, if its reconciliation, then ask her more, but i suspect you may not get another reply to a text or whatever. she is saying how she felt.

Posted

Hi,

 

so you are saying...she is saying she is sad about how it ended.

 

Yes, she was talking about the mess at the end as "what happened."

 

Ariadne

  • Author
Posted

I did not reply to her previous text...so I get a email from her today

 

Now she's accusing me of crank calling her....which I am definitely not doing...I drunk text...but never crank call

 

here's her email

I'm really really sorry about everything that happened with us. I still feel really traumatized by the whole situation. Please stop calling on the untraceable number. It gets really annoying. If you really need to talk, call me in person. Otherwise, it is best to just let go of things and move on.

 

She still feels really traumatized....nice...she cheats and she is playing the victim role

 

what the hell is going on with her

Posted

With you keeping on wondering what this and that means you are going to drive yourself nuts serendip and you and I both know this! Seeing how I am doing the same type of stuff with my ex I know what you are feeling. Maybe we just want validation that they actually cared about us? (Why do we need this anyways they cheated on US!?!?!)

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