I'm in trouble here

[shayna]

Hey guys

 

I'm not doing well and haven't been ever since my breakup 5 months ago. In fact, things have gotten so much worse. I just get so depressed and can't stop thinking about him, our 8.5 year relationship (which wasn't that great- I can only remember the negative things now), and how from what I hear he's having loads of fun and laughter with friends and one woman in particular. I've seen pictures of them obviously having a blast together. I've seen emails that aren't romantic but giggly. This is something we never seemed to experience- or at least I can't remember being like that ever. I just can't understand where those 8.5 years went to him. How he can just move on and let them go. He has said that I am half his life that they have not gone anywhere- that it hurts him so much whenever he sees something I gave to him in the past. But with him having all this fun, I just can't believe this. Plus, I was the one that had the hard time trying to get him to express any emotion in our relationship- so why am I the one so upset to finally see it end? Why can't I just be happy that he is at least happy? I miss him and love him so much and unfortunately I think I always will. I can't stand hoping that years from now, he'll come back...I can't concentrate on anything else- especially not med school! I'm thinking I'll fail out and I worked SOOO hard to get here! I've tried therapy, meds (which I've started up again but sadly like all the others, they do nothing), hypnotherapy, staying busy with friends and school...I'm at my breaking point I just can't do this anymore. I'm giving up.

[taylor3205]

Hey Shayna,

 

I know how you feel. But please dont give up med school, I know you wont feel like studying at the moment but keep on going, it will take every little last ounce of effort I know, but you have obviously worked hard to get where you are at right now and it would be a shame to throw it all away.

 

As for everything else, it just takes time. I am in a bad place right now and I dont feel like carrying on, but, you have too. I have lots of coursework to do and I have put it off for days, I am getting to the point where I am going to HAVE to do it soon or I will fail. Its the last thing I feel like doing, but I done a little a few days ago and it did take my mind off things for a while.

 

Stay busy and stay strong.

[bustertypsy]

Dear Shayna,my heart is breaking after reading your post.I am struggling with my own life but I want to reach out and give you both my shoulders to cry on.Your pain is so evident,I can feel it in every word you write.

8.5 years is a long long time to share with somebody.I noticed you said it wasn't always great.Well said,too many people seem to think a relationship has to be fluttering hearts and endless happiness.Reality is a relationship that's about having somebody to stand by you in good times,but especially in BAD.Sunshine people are ten a penny,we don't want or need them.You are a person who commits and I feel that.

So he has moved on.What did those 8.5 yrs mean to him?

Well probably lot more than you will ever think.A person doesn't spend that much time with someone and just move on.It may seem like that,but no way.

Don't mind people telling you he is having a great time without you.He may appear to be,but he has to face himself next day.I'm sure after the alcohol has worn off he isn't that guy he appears to be the night before.

You know who you are and how good you are.If he doesn't see that(but he did for 8.5 yrs)then he has lost all reason.

Bet ya one day he will get on his knees to beg forgiveness.By then you will be with the person who was truly meant for you.

Life has a funny way of sorting itself out.

Be strong......happiness is around the corner!!!!

[daisydufas22]

Hey guys

 

I'm not doing well and haven't been ever since my breakup 5 months ago. In fact, things have gotten so much worse. I just get so depressed and can't stop thinking about him, our 8.5 year relationship (which wasn't that great- I can only remember the negative things now), and how from what I hear he's having loads of fun and laughter with friends and one woman in particular. I've seen pictures of them obviously having a blast together. I've seen emails that aren't romantic but giggly. This is something we never seemed to experience- or at least I can't remember being like that ever. I just can't understand where those 8.5 years went to him. How he can just move on and let them go. He has said that I am half his life that they have not gone anywhere- that it hurts him so much whenever he sees something I gave to him in the past. But with him having all this fun, I just can't believe this. Plus, I was the one that had the hard time trying to get him to express any emotion in our relationship- so why am I the one so upset to finally see it end? Why can't I just be happy that he is at least happy? I miss him and love him so much and unfortunately I think I always will. I can't stand hoping that years from now, he'll come back...I can't concentrate on anything else- especially not med school! I'm thinking I'll fail out and I worked SOOO hard to get here! I've tried therapy, meds (which I've started up again but sadly like all the others, they do nothing), hypnotherapy, staying busy with friends and school...I'm at my breaking point I just can't do this anymore. I'm giving up.

 

 

Oh...BIG HUGS!

 

Please don't give up on med school. Even go part-time if you have to. If you give up on this he has taken everything from you and I know you are stronger than that!

 

You really don't know what he's feeling and after he said that to you I wouldn't really care what he feels or thinks.

 

Achieve great things for yourself! This way YOU will make yourself happy!

 

You can do this, I know you can! Don't let one person ruin your life.

 

I let a man ruin my life and it was so hard to pick myself up again. Please don't give up. Just keep going......I know it's the hardest thing in the world to do but you are worth it.

 

Please let us know how you are going!