Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 I seriously cannot handle these feelings. They are far too overwhelming. Given how I feel right now, I question that I've ever even been in love before. I feel panicky and giddy and fearful and excited and worried and treasured all at the same time. What to do?
LoveLace Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Star Gaze all I can say is congratulations...the roller coaster of emotions can definitely be overwhelming. But I guess all you can do is try to enjoy every part of the ride. I myself am still waiting in a long, long, line I don't think I'll ever get a turn!
Author Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 He's leaving in 6 weeks , at which point we'll temporarily do the LDR thing until he figures out his next step career-wise. I want to do whatever it takes to make this relationship work. Unfortunately, I haven't had much experience with relationships that "work", so I'm terrified. But I feel as though I'd follow him to the end of the world. He has no idea how I really feel, at least I don't think so. I literally feel like my heart is in my throat. It's overwhelming...
heatherd1201 Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 That feeling is so special. Hang on to it, because the overwhelming feeling fades, and you miss it. But it is replaced with comfort. I hope that the LDR part of it works out ok for you. How far away will he be? He doesnt know you fee the way you do? Why dont you tell him? He just might say he feels the same..
Trialbyfire Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 ((SG)) And what an incredible feeling it is. There's nothing you can do but relax and enjoy it.
shadowplay Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Awwwwwww. :love: Falling in love is an amazing mixture of fear and excitement. The fear you're experiencing now is perfectly natural. Just enjoy the good feelings and let yourself fall. Have you told him yet?
LoveLace Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 ...I feel the kid in class that goes "Oh! Oh! Me Me!" everytime the teacher asks a question..... How long will the LDR last? Are you worried about it? Well I guess anyone would be to an extent. I wonder if it's a good idea to tell someone when feelings are that overwhelming?
shadowplay Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 ...I feel the kid in class that goes "Oh! Oh! Me Me!" everytime the teacher asks a question..... How long will the LDR last? Are you worried about it? Well I guess anyone would be to an extent. I wonder if it's a good idea to tell someone when feelings are that overwhelming? Expressing those feelings, in slightly attenuated terms, has usually worked out well for me. I told my bf "I think I'm falling in love with you," even though the reality was more like "I'm 99% sure I'm already in love with you." Revealing my feelings for him gave him the confidence to do the same. You will know when the time is right.
Art_Critic Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 SG... Sit back and coast some.. It will all work out in the end.. If you get all up tight it won't help things and could bring back some unhealthy responses to those feelings. Have you told him you love him ?
Author Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 ((SG)) And what an incredible feeling it is. There's nothing you can do but relax and enjoy it. RELAX??!? How?!?! Seriously. How can it be that when I think about him and how I feel I burst into TEARS? I've been the biggest cry baby lately, it's ridiculous. That cannot be healthy. Ugh. Awwwwwww. :love: Falling in love is an amazing mixture of fear and excitement. The fear you're experiencing now is perfectly natural. Just enjoy the good feelings and let yourself fall. Have you told him yet? I don't like the fear part. Not at all. I can't eat. I haven't told him how I feel - at least not directly. I've told him that I care a great deal about him, only want him to be happy (either close to me or far, far away) and that I don't want to lose him over these job-related discussions we've been having. Until yesterday, I didn't know that he was seriously thinking about me in weighing his options...he even turned down a job offer that would have pulled him out of state away from me (I didn't know about the offer until it had come and gone). Until yesterday, he also didn't know that I would be possibly willing to move to where ever he ends up someday if the opportunity is right (see all the conditions there?). He's been stressed because he assumed that no matter what, I was dead set on staying where I am now. Before him, that probably would have been true. But now... as long as I can earn a living where ever he goes, I'd be down for considering following him someday...eventually. Now that he knows that, I think he has an inkling of how I feel... but I haven't come out and said those three words yet. I don't think it would be a good idea to share my feelings right now given how intense they are. I literally feel irrational. Crazy in love.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 I seriously cannot handle these feelings. They are far too overwhelming. Given how I feel right now, I question that I've ever even been in love before. I feel panicky and giddy and fearful and excited and worried and treasured all at the same time. What to do? Hugs to you SG! I can totally empathize with you here... I feel like I'm going insane...my emotions have been so out of whack. It's nice to know even together women like you can temporarily misplace some of her marbles over a guy. He must be pretty special.
Author Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 SG... Sit back and coast some.. It will all work out in the end.. How does one "coast"? I am trying to my damndest to keep things light and fun and whatnot when we're together. However, he's very intuitive...almost creepily so.
Art_Critic Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 How does one "coast"? I am trying to my damndest to keep things light and fun and whatnot when we're together. However, he's very intuitive...almost creepily so. You don't react to anything.... Just let it all happen.. in a sense you act instead of react. You are fine..
Kamille Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Nice Star and I can relate, although for once, I don't feel afraid of anything. I kind of adopted an "I know I can live with the consequences of whatever happens between us" attitude which takes the fear away. But sometimes I feel dizzy just thinking about how much my life has changed in the last two months. Like you, for the first time in my life, I would consider following my bf wherever he goes as long as I can work in my field wherever it is. (He is also looking for a job). But how is this for scary... Since I spend all my time at his place anyways, bf and I are talking about moving in together...
shadowplay Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 RELAX??!? I don't like the fear part. Not at all. I can't eat. Now that he knows that, I think he has an inkling of how I feel... but I haven't come out and said those three words yet. I don't think it would be a good idea to share my feelings right now given how intense they are. I literally feel irrational. Crazy in love. Wait until the feelings cool down a bit and you feel more emotionally sober to tell him. I find that love comes in waves: it's always there but sometimes the emotions really overflow, while at others they lie quietly in the background. Actually,expressing how I felt to him helped with some of the fear because it was like uncorking a bottle that was ready to burst. Once you do, you won't have to house the feeling inside yourself...you can share the experience with the other person and that definitely helps relieve some of the pressure. I felt a lot better when I told my bf about my fears and he responded that he was going through the same thing. Just last night we had a discussion about it online and he said "I can definitely relate to the fear of the emotional nudity that goes along with being in a loving relationship."
Trialbyfire Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 RELAX??!? How?!?! Seriously. How can it be that when I think about him and how I feel I burst into TEARS? I've been the biggest cry baby lately, it's ridiculous. That cannot be healthy. Ugh. Sweetie, go ahead and cry if it helps release some of those emotions. I've been crazy in love before too and wow, talk about wanting to be with them 24/7 and being overwhelmed by it all. You're only human SG.
Author Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 Sweetie, go ahead and cry if it helps release some of those emotions. I've been crazy in love before too and wow, talk about wanting to be with them 24/7 and being overwhelmed by it all. You're only human SG. Thanks, TBF. I know I'm human, but I hate the back and forth between butterflies and having my heart in my throat. I think I've literally made myself sick from crying - I'm totally congested.
LiveKhaos Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Awwww!! Congrats! I'm still waiting on that "Crazy in Love" feeling...but even though I don't know you, I'm happy that you've started to experience something so special!.....You've just been ..!!..Lol...
LoveLace Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 I don't consider myself a person with low self-esteem... but somehow it's funny to me, to think of a guy being that giddy over me and dedicating himself that much to me..I just don't see it happening..
oppath Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 I'm happy for you SG. To be completely and honestly selfish, at first I was a bit jealous, then I felt reflective on my last gf who told me she was in love with me like you describe your guy and I got mad at myself for not being expressive with her even though I felt the same because I was too scared, but after I closed my browser for a minute I had a more rational thought: you have been crazy in love before, or thought you were, and you found something even stronger. Selfishly, this relates to me because I realize "hey, people find new loves. It happens." With you...look, you have handled it. Just because your past relationships did not last, you did handle it. You coped with it. This new love, maybe it will lead to a lasting marriage, maybe it will fade, but you will cope with it whether is works out, or whether it fades. You will be just fine. Anxiety and excitement are the same neuro-physical emotion, but with a different cognition. This is EXCITING. Is it scary to jump from a 20 ft rock into water...yes, but it is exciting, not crippling. Embrace this. I'm tremendously happy for you.
EYECANDY000 Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 just enjoy it!!! Its a wonderful feeling thats definately undescribable
spookie Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 What do you mean LDR for a while until y'all figure things out? Are you feeling fear because you're afraid things might end?
Cobra_X30 Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Thanks, TBF. I know I'm human, but I hate the back and forth between butterflies and having my heart in my throat. I think I've literally made myself sick from crying - I'm totally congested. Do you fear that your love will be unreturned? I assure you that you are more than worthy!
Author Star Gazer Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 I'm happy for you SG. To be completely and honestly selfish, at first I was a bit jealous, then I felt reflective on my last gf who told me she was in love with me like you describe your guy and I got mad at myself for not being expressive with her even though I felt the same because I was too scared, but after I closed my browser for a minute I had a more rational thought: you have been crazy in love before, or thought you were, and you found something even stronger. Selfishly, this relates to me because I realize "hey, people find new loves. It happens." With you...look, you have handled it. Just because your past relationships did not last, you did handle it. You coped with it. This new love, maybe it will lead to a lasting marriage, maybe it will fade, but you will cope with it whether is works out, or whether it fades. You will be just fine. Anxiety and excitement are the same neuro-physical emotion, but with a different cognition. This is EXCITING. Is it scary to jump from a 20 ft rock into water...yes, but it is exciting, not crippling. Embrace this. I'm tremendously happy for you. My anchor. Thank you. So why didn't you share your feelings with your last GF? Why were you scared? I know I'll be fine if it fades. But I don't want to be just "fine." I want the GOOD part of what I'm feeling to last forever...
Touche Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 My anchor. Thank you. So why didn't you share your feelings with your last GF? Why were you scared? I know I'll be fine if it fades. But I don't want to be just "fine." I want the GOOD part of what I'm feeling to last forever... But that "high" that you're on doesn't last forever. It's not realistic to expect that it will. As for the rest...I loved Shadowplay's post. Both my H and I just came out with it, very early on and admitted how we felt. No holding back! It does relieve some of that "scary" part. So I do agree with that. Do you think you finally found the "real deal?" I'm happy for you too, SG! Enjoy the hell out of this...that high really is fleeting. Hold on to it as long as you can.
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