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Is this ever going to stop


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Posted

Hello everybody -

 

I haven't been here since August I think. I've been doing quite good for the past months, until just few seconds ago I heard some girl here at the library laugh just like my ex did. That hit me in the stomach. I don't think I have any serious feelings for my ex, but she pops into my mind every once and a while. But I just smile and go on with what I was doing.

 

I'm gonna fill you in with my relationship. I met this girl half a year before we started dating, and I liked her from the first minute. We were only together for about 7-8 months so I guess I can say that I invested about a year of my time in this girl. It was wonderful in the beginning, but then it started getting boring and in the end I wasn't all that happy with the relationship. It actually didn't have anything to do with her per se, it was more the circumstances. Her sister got extremely jelous and didn't want me around much (they lived together). I lived with my parents and couldn't afford apartment (was in college). Actually, non of these things matter today. All I know is that when you're unhappy in a 7 month old relationship, it is time to end it. We did it mutually. I told her that I was unhappy and wanted to work on some things. She broke it off a week later. I wasn't devastated, but it came later. For months I felt bad and missed her really much, but I maintained NC and so did she.

 

Actually I didn't meet her until 6-7 months later at a club and were both a little drunk. We had a nice talk and she told me that she had been seeing another guy for few weeks, but she recently ended it. It came to me as a shock, but if course it was normal, I knew that. I myself had been seeing other girls too. It just hurts a lot more knowing that your ex is seeing someone, that you knowing that you are seeing someone. We ended that night by sleeping in each others arms, no sex though.) Since I left her place that morning, I haven't heard from her except from some meaningless MSN chats.

 

Well, I don't consider this girl as an option day. I have learned that when it ends..it's over. No time being flushed down to toilet chasing her. She is a good memory, and she will probably be forever.

 

I've been single for over a year now. I usually like to be single and being able to do whatever I want to do. Most of my oldest friends are in relationships and some of them have kids now. I've got a lot of other friends that I met in college.

 

My problem is that I've been seeings few girls this year. Dated 6-8 girls seriously. But I always end it after few dates. None of the girl can make my smile, none of them can make me feel close to how my ex made me feel. I'm really afraid that I will never meet a girl that I really can love with all my heart.

 

I have an example of my best friend. He had a girlfriend for 4-5 years, and their relationship ended February 2006. His ex was awesome and he loved her really much. The breakup came out of nowhere. I handled things by going clubbing and slept with 30-40 girls over the summer and fall. Until he met this girl last december. They've been together since then. He tells all his friends (incl. me) that this girl is the best things that have ever happened to him. But I know him better. He doesn't look as happy as he was with his ex. We sometimes discuss this matters when we're drunk and he has told me very often that he doesn't love her...and doesn't even care for her as much as his ex which dumped him 18 months earlier.

 

I'm so afraid to end up in his position. Telling everyone that I'm so happy with my new girl, and underneath I know that she will never make me as happy as my ex did. Only the thought of it sounds terrifying.

 

Has anyone stories to cheer my up a little...I need it before my exams start :)

 

Take care and enjoy your lives...

Posted

You can't keep hoping people will make you as happy as your ex.

It's not going to happen. Your friend is tring to move on, in a very starnge way but he is trying. I think you both should take some time to heal, it's like sitting in the corner crying for a few months is not an option.

Why?

Posted

shoot if you feel that way dont you think its worth another try?

 

i know its not healthy to harp on one person, but i think your emotions are trying to send you a signal. i really would make sure its truly DONE before you decide to cut her off like that, what if she feels the same way?

 

you never know until you try, and do you really want to got he rest of your life not knowing what could have been?

Posted

this how I feel about MY ex....I have had offers to date, I know I could go w/these girls, and I have been in some long ass relationships, the one before current X was 3 years..yet I was with this girl 2 1/2 mo and Im completly devasted, I KNOW she is it..I dont wanna live the lie like you talka bout either

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