LateShow20 Posted November 28, 2007 Posted November 28, 2007 Hey, I was with my g/f for a little under 2 years. We broke up...it wasn't a bad break up we didnt' hate each other but she wanted to be single so I had to let her free. This was at the end of August so it's been a few months. We stayed close still friends but I still wanted more. She on the other hand said she just wanted to be friends and thats all she could ever see us being, she said she just doesn't think about me that way anymore. She never ruled out getting back together always saying I don't see it happening for a long time. Tonight I finally told her that I couldn't be just friends right now and I needed time to try and lose my strong feelings. She said she wasn't mad and said that she would be there whenever I needed her. She said she'd always be a phone call away and that if I ever missed her or anything she would be open to talking. She also said when I was ready to talk again she would welcome me back into her life. When I said goodbye it definately sounded like she was sad though. My question is how long do I do the NC thing before I try to talk again?
Crestfallen_KH Posted November 28, 2007 Posted November 28, 2007 NC isn't for them, it's for you. You go no contact to get your life back and move on. It's not really a tool to try and manipulate someone back into your life, though admittedly many people use it for that purpose. Instead of focusing on HER and when you can talk to HER and HER sadness, focus on you. YOU need to heal and move on from this. She's made it clear she doesn't want a relationship with you. So, to answer the question you asked, I would say "indefinitely" or, at the very least, until any romantic feelings have faded and you think you COULD handle being "just friends." But, you may never get to that point, so it may be forever.
Author LateShow20 Posted November 28, 2007 Author Posted November 28, 2007 NC isn't for them, it's for you. You go no contact to get your life back and move on. It's not really a tool to try and manipulate someone back into your life, though admittedly many people use it for that purpose. Instead of focusing on HER and when you can talk to HER and HER sadness, focus on you. YOU need to heal and move on from this. She's made it clear she doesn't want a relationship with you. So, to answer the question you asked, I would say "indefinitely" or, at the very least, until any romantic feelings have faded and you think you COULD handle being "just friends." But, you may never get to that point, so it may be forever. Yeah,the main reason I want NC is I can't handle being just friends with this girl. I want more. There is a part of me hoping she will realize she still has feelings for me while we don't talk. Thats not the reason I wanted to go NC though.
thelegend Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 Well brother it's obvious she doesn't want anything but a friendship so if you want more you might be in NC for a long time until you can talk to her and hear her talking about other guys without you getting mad at her.
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