ahotmess Posted November 25, 2007 Posted November 25, 2007 I was involved with a MM for a little over two years. I called it off, and then a few months later W found out and contacted me. A few months after that, they got a D. And guess what? He never told me. He is now dating someone else and his excuse was "You told me to just let you go, I thought I was doing the right thing for you". It was BS, just like everything else. But here is the problem. This whole thing has completely changed me. I know it was wrong......we all are painfully aware every day that being involved with a MM or MW is wrong. In that regard I know that I am warranted some degree of hearache. He is the only person I have ever been in love with. This is my first broken heart. Time is making a difference. It is getting better. But everything reminds me of him. I constantly think about him. I went to a psychic and didnt give any information and she told me that he is my soulmate, but another woman was in the way.....I thought "who? his wife?". I want to forget about him. I want to move on. I have to. I left a career that I absolutely love in order to be away from him, and now I am completely miserable in that aspect of my life. Any ideas? Anyone been here?
Leia Posted November 25, 2007 Posted November 25, 2007 That was a very lame excuse. You may have asked him to leave you alone but if you meant something to him, he should have told you! You're hurting and I am sorry you're feeling this way. I think it is crystal clear that he should be written off of your Xmas list for good!! Forgetting someone is not an easy thing to do. It took me almost forever to get over my ex (and he cheated on me!!) but I did and it felt so good. I feel so alive after that. It felt as if a huge heavy rock was lift off my shoulders. Can't you get back to your career elsewhere? Maybe getting back into something you love doing would make it easier for you to move on?
american-woman Posted November 25, 2007 Posted November 25, 2007 This is just what happens when we involve ourselves with someone else`s spouse. And I hope it has changed you enough so you dont do this again.
GreenEyedLady Posted November 25, 2007 Posted November 25, 2007 Sorry that some people can't be supportive; apparently there are those who love to kick people when they're down and can't be helpful *rolling eyes*... I am sorry for your hurt...Know that you have done what you need to be happy in the long run...As for your career, keep your goals in mind and you'll get back there... Time will heal your wounds...Have you thought about seeing a therapist that you can talk to and will be on your side? It might be a good way to forgive yourself and move on... ((HUGS))
Author ahotmess Posted November 29, 2007 Author Posted November 29, 2007 Thankyou all for your support:) This site totally helped me while I was involved and helped me take the steps to end it. And I would love (absolutely love) to respond somehow to the not so nice comments....but how old are we here? This isn't HS. These are real feelings/people and I am thankful to have a place to come to, where others understand. greeneyedlady-I have thought of seeing a therapist....just not sure if it would help. As for the career..eventually I will go back to another company. But for now I need to take this time and work on my own personal well being and ideas....but that seems impossible....with him always on my mind. There was never any real closure...we dabbled with emails a couple of times...but he quit responding. He admitted that he'd been terrible to both me and his (now ex)W. And I guess that helped...not really...but whatever. I guess there's no time frame on love though huh? I know it was real. And ironically I feel most sorry for him. That's why I can't hate him. Stupid I know.
whichwayisup Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 greeneyedlady-I have thought of seeing a therapist....just not sure if it would help. But, what if it does help? What do you have to lose? Think about it..
child_of_isis Posted November 29, 2007 Posted November 29, 2007 I have heard of a lot of mid lifers doing this. They fall head over heels in love with OW, exit the marriage, then dump the OW. I was involved with a MM for a little over two years. I called it off, and then a few months later W found out and contacted me. A few months after that, they got a D. And guess what? He never told me. He is now dating someone else and his excuse was "You told me to just let you go, I thought I was doing the right thing for you". It was BS, just like everything else.
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