greganan Posted November 24, 2007 Posted November 24, 2007 I asked this girl on a date a month ago, and she said she's ok with dating, but she doesn't want to go out. She said: A date is okay, I don't mind that. Just that my intentions are to hang out and do something. I replied that I would be fine just doing stuff, but that I may be looking for a long term relationship, although not necessarily with her. She replied: well in that case, maybe you should look for the long term part elsewhere, although im down for the doing stuffs part I kinda stayed away from her for a few wks, but then we hung out a few times recently. The last time, she said that I had "special qualities that no other person has" and that it would be really cool if we went to the same graduate school together. She asked to see my place that night, and while we were watching a movie, leaned against my shoulder. But I didn't make a move because I thought she wasn't interested in long term. What's what? Is it a game or is she serious? Don't you generally date in order to find a future SO? Also does that mean she'd be willing to get physical (maybe friends w/ benefits?) so long as it isn't emotional?
Lauriebell82 Posted November 24, 2007 Posted November 24, 2007 Well, she told you her intentions. She doesn't want a relationship. If you do, then I suggest you find that and let this girl go. And no, you don't always date just to find a SO. People date just casually, or just to have fun with no intention of it turning in to anything. However, sometimes that kind of situation does progress naturally into a more serious relationship, even if both people aren't looking for that. But, I wouldn't count on this happening with a girl. Also, why would you want FWB when you want a long term relationship..that's weird. A friends with benefits situation would not be a good idea in this case, and I generally advise against them if one person is looking for something more serious out of the deal. My advice is to not hook up with her or pursue her. If you like hanging out with her you guys could just be friends, but it seems as though you want different things out of the situation, and one person is bound to get hurt. Save yourself the trouble and stress.
Author greganan Posted November 24, 2007 Author Posted November 24, 2007 It just seemed like she might've changed her mind? The thing is, after getting shot down a month ago, I'm afraid to bring it up again.
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