HarakIgia Posted November 24, 2007 Posted November 24, 2007 I asked my H to leave this past Sunday. He's very pissed with me due to the timing of the holiday. Regardless I still asked him to join us and he did. But, what I want to ask you all is how do you communicate? He's very angry. He's extremely stubborn and at the moment very self centered and selfish. My dilemma is that we have kids. They want to see him. They want to spend time with him. And I hate that he's not saying to me OK I'd like to pick them up tomorrow for lunch or dinner or the night. I totally want him to have them as much as he'd like. He always used them as the excuse for us not to separate. It's always been if we didn't have kids this would be so much easier. Well, he's not acting that way no that we've come to this part. He's not trying to see them as much as he can. He's not calling them. I don't want to pester him and say stuff to him. But, I have to say it breaks my heart that he's not interested more in doing things with them. My kids want to buy a Christmas tree this weekend I just don't know what to do? Do I call him? I've been told by friends and family to just leave him alone. That since his values have changed to allow him time to live like he wants. Free! Brief: After 14yrs of marriage and 22yrs together he says he wants to be true to himself. He wants to be able to flirt or do more with whoever he wants. That even if I'm with him I shouldn't mind that he's flirting or touching another women. Ideally he would love a open marriage. You can always read the full story on my thread in coping. But, this is pretty much it. So, I decided I couldn't keep going on like this. He also moves into his brand new apt. We are financially straped. We have a lien on our home due to him not filing our taxes for 7yrs. I know how the hell didn't I realize this. We lived in the UK for 6yrs. and the company always took care of it. When we came back he said that there were problems and they were handling it. Yeah, right! Mr. IRS finally came to the house & I realized the truth. I'm sorry I'm making this longer than needed. So, we're strapped. But, we have plenty of things for him to take from our home to fill up his new place. I have mentioned that but I'm not sure he'll take me up on that. We just don't have the money for him to buy new things for his bachelor pad. What do I do? I've been gathering things for him. Should I just email him? He really doesn't want to see or speak to me. It's easier to put all the blame on me. So, if anyone has been in my shoes and has any advice I'd love to hear how to approach this. Thanks!
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