sunshine111 Posted November 22, 2007 Posted November 22, 2007 Hi! Im 37 my partner is 43. He lives 40 miles away from me but works very close to where I live. Ive been with him for 5 weeks, we're getting on really well and I can see a future with him. For the past week he has been hinting that he would love to move in with me.. I havent lived with anyone for 4 years and I am looking forward to the day when I can share my life with someone but I think it is too soon. I also have 3 children to consider.. They have met my partner and they like him, I told him he could stay over on xmas eve and I know, if I let him, he would move in then too! He has already said he would like to put his house on the market as it seems silly running two homes.. Life would be so much easier for him.. he wouldn't have to drive an hour to work everyday and his dog wouldnt have to stay on her own.. I don't have doubts about him whatsoever, he is a lovely man and i feel really close to him, I can see a future so why doesnt he agree with me when I say it's too soon? How long should I give it? If I gave it till xmas is 2 months too soon? Any comment much appreciated x
Lovegod Posted November 22, 2007 Posted November 22, 2007 When should boyfriend move in? When there's wedding plans in the making. Ive been with him for 5 weeks Wow, aren't we jumping the gun! You barely know his personality and habits, yet you want to move in together? That's just asking for trouble. I'd say wait AT LEAST a year before getting this committed.
2sunny Posted November 22, 2007 Posted November 22, 2007 Hi! Im 37 my partner is 43. He lives 40 miles away from me but works very close to where I live. Ive been with him for 5 weeks, we're getting on really well and I can see a future with him. For the past week he has been hinting that he would love to move in with me.. I havent lived with anyone for 4 years and I am looking forward to the day when I can share my life with someone but I think it is too soon. I also have 3 children to consider.. They have met my partner and they like him, I told him he could stay over on xmas eve and I know, if I let him, he would move in then too! He has already said he would like to put his house on the market as it seems silly running two homes.. Life would be so much easier for him.. he wouldn't have to drive an hour to work everyday and his dog wouldnt have to stay on her own.. I don't have doubts about him whatsoever, he is a lovely man and i feel really close to him, I can see a future so why doesnt he agree with me when I say it's too soon? How long should I give it? If I gave it till xmas is 2 months too soon? Any comment much appreciated x considering you have 3 kids to consider - i would say AFTER you are married.
Ms. Red Posted November 22, 2007 Posted November 22, 2007 I agree with 2sunny. I think his wanting to move in & talk of selling his house this quick is cause for alarm! Keep your Mama Bear instincts on HIGH!
Lauriebell82 Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 I agree with the other posters that this is NOT a good idea. 5 weeks is way too soon to even be thinking about that! I also do not think it's a good idea to involve children in a cohabitation situation. Wait till after you are married for that! You need to tell this guy that you think it is too soon. Who cares if he is more "inconvienced." Moving in together for reasons of convience is not a good idea, you should move in together when you are committed to each other and love each other.
Lovegod Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Oh man, I missed the part about her having three kids! By letting some dude you barely know move into your place, you're setting a piss-poor example for them to follow when they become involved in relationships. Also, who knows if he's a child molester just wanting to get his hands on your kids? You need to think about the safety of your children first before you go letting some strange dude move in and be around your kids when you're not home.
SoleMate Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Yes, you might be surprised how many child molesters deliberately seek out women with children. It's a GREAT way to accomplish their twisted goals. And with him being SO eager, so early on, along with sob stories about his dog's comfort, this one is a BIG RED FLAG!!!!! He doesn't ever "NEED" to move in.
WaterTiger Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Let me see...how to put this gently.... NO FREAKING WAY! The number one sign a guy has a tendency for being an abusive pervert is that he says he loves you, wants to marry you and wants to move in as soon as possible. Protect yourself! Protect your children! DO NOT LET THIS GUY MOVE INTO YOUR HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
allina Posted November 23, 2007 Posted November 23, 2007 Yes, you might be surprised how many child molesters deliberately seek out women with children. It's a GREAT way to accomplish their twisted goals. And with him being SO eager, so early on, along with sob stories about his dog's comfort, this one is a BIG RED FLAG!!!!! He doesn't ever "NEED" to move in. Let me see...how to put this gently.... NO FREAKING WAY! The number one sign a guy has a tendency for being an abusive pervert is that he says he loves you, wants to marry you and wants to move in as soon as possible. Protect yourself! Protect your children! DO NOT LET THIS GUY MOVE INTO YOUR HOUSE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look carefully at the posts above! You have NO right moving a strange man in with your children! 5 weeks is nothing! Get yourself together please, a man shouldn't even be meeting your children after 5 weeks!
Recommended Posts