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NC thread for Thanksgiving...


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Posted

So I figured many of us might have the idea that our exes might want to hear from us on thanksgiving (well, I guess just the LSers in the US -- sorry to the others). Instead of breaking down and sending that email or that text, how about posting your well wishes to your ex here.

 

I'll start.

 

I hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving. I hope your life is all you want it to be. I hope that one day, I'll move on and be happy with someone else, as you might be right now. I hope that you think of me with regret, on this day of thanks, and wonder what it was you gave up so easily. Anyway, happy thanksgiving. I'll spend it with people I love, and people who love me back. A truly novel concept. You should try it sometime.

 

Your turn!

Posted

Dear B...

 

I hope you choke on a bone.

 

Wouldn't be the first time. ;)

 

Seriously, though...

 

I hope you and your family are healthy, and that your parents continue to be healthy after your big mouth slips and you accidentally tell them you and your best friend had a 2 year live-in lesbian relationship, during which you bought her a car and financed her car insurance (even while she was largely unemployed), all the while hiding this from your parents as they continued to send money and gifts to help support her daughter, which they regarded as their own child, not knowing the kid's mother and you have been tongue-dancing for years. :)

 

Your father, the Orthodox Catholic and financial guru must be doubly "proud" of you, and your mother who is finally accepting that she will never have someone call her "Grandma" must be overjoyed that you "would rather die than have a child".

 

Of course, I'm sure your parents are just happy that you "got rid of the Jew".

 

Happy Thanksgiving! :)

 

Love,

 

Me

 

-tp

not bitter, just having some fun :)

Posted

I remember how thankful I was for you last year. I love you so much and would give anything to be with you this year, showing my friends how lucky and happy I was. I hope the girl you're with this year (and I'm assuming there is one; you're too beautiful for there not to be) is everything I wasn't, and that you are as thankful for her as I was for you this time last year. I wish I could have been what you wanted. I wish I could have been the one for whose love you gave thanks. I am so sorry I wasn't enough. I love you.

Posted

Dear X,

 

I hope you enjoy this Thanksgiving, our first as a divorced couple. I hope you have a fantastic time spending it with that closet homosexual that you call a boyfriend; the same bald-headed idiot that you chose over me. I look forward to seeing him on "To Catch a Predator" someday, as he looks like a pedophile. I wonder how he will react when he finds out that you have a complete inability to tell the truth and that even the most low-key of days causes you to stress and freak out. To the new boyfriend: She has another guy on the back-burner - probably more than one. Just so you know, the second you make the smallest of mistakes, she will be jumping ship and leaving you in the dark. She left her marriage after less than a year grasping the excuse of "you don't give me enough attention." Good luck with that - you have been warned.

Posted

Dear x,

I hope you have a happy Thanksgiving with your family and friends. It's a shame that I won't be there with you, but I chose not to be because it would be too hard for me to face your family two years after our breakup. Eat lots of turkey, be happy and maybe.... think of me?

Posted

Dear Lord Loser,

 

I hope you have a nice Thanksgiving with your family that you always trashed talked & avoided while we were married. I hope you enjoy going to that family members home whom you swear is the one who called CPS on me with false allegations of sexual abuse upon our child.

 

They always said I had you 'whipped' but funny how they now plan your holidays for you since you are back living with them again! Ha ha ha. You should of thought of that possibility before you flaunted your high paying job & pictures of fancy apartment complexes to dangle like a carrot in front of our son so he would live with you. Look where you are now that you lost that insecure job.

Posted

HI guys, I've been doing ok and staying away from LS for a while. Glad this was started.

 

Hi you,

I miss you. I still think the reasons we broke up should not be keeping us apart if we still love each other. Alas you disagree. Good luck to you.

Me

  • Author
Posted

Only 6 people had issues with NC today? Wow, we are doing a lot better than I thought!

 

I just wonder why so many threads where started today if we are doing this well :-)

 

Well, I hope everyone got through the day unscathed. I am happy to report that not only did I not contact my ex, I really didn't even consider it. He crossed my mind, sure, but it didn't hurt. That's good progress.

Posted

Well,

 

I just saw a video that the gf of Denver guy posted online that he and his friends made.

 

It was a turkey that they filled with Dynamite or something, set up a table outside, and made the bird explode and burn.

 

I found it very disturbing because that poor bird was alive and they killed it for its flesh, so that it'd feed someone. Not that I'm happy about that either being that my son and I are vegetarians, but that video was the ultimate disrespect for that poor bird.

 

I don't know if they think it was amusing, I suppose.

 

So, this is what I have to say to Denver guy: :(

 

Everything he's done after he got together with her more or less has been effective at breaking my heart one more time.

 

Ariadne

Posted

Dearest X,

 

I just got home from spending the day with family and friends and as grateful as I am for having them in my life, I can't help but wish you were here by my side. This is the first year in many that I haven't spent with you and I hope that it's the last. You are my great love and I am so sorry that you think I didn't want to be with you. Every day I regret making you feel that way. I didn't understand and I hate myself for it now. I wish you love and joy. My heart will continue to ache for you. Please, please forgive me. I regret everything from the bottom of my heart.

 

I love you,

Grace112

Posted
Only 6 people had issues with NC today? Wow, we are doing a lot better than I thought!

 

I just wonder why so many threads where started today if we are doing this well :-)

 

Well, I hope everyone got through the day unscathed. I am happy to report that not only did I not contact my ex, I really didn't even consider it. He crossed my mind, sure, but it didn't hurt. That's good progress.

 

Just think where we both were this time last year, and how far we've come. :)

 

It's going to be fine, my dearest friend... it's going to be fine.

 

Hell, if you saw how much I made today while doing very little real work (since it was all family style/buffet style at work).... you'd laugh your ass off.

 

-tp

rollin' in da benjamins

  • Author
Posted
Just think where we both were this time last year, and how far we've come. :)

 

Umm, this time last year I was with my ex. lol. You're a bit off on your timeframes. I don't want to think about where I was this time of year last year, I had him for all the holidays, last year....

Posted

Since I'm staying at my mom's house for the holiday weekend, I didn't get to log on to LS until now. I must say this was a great idea for a thread. I'd like to respond now even though I managed to maintain my NC yesterday despite the painful ache. I kept thinking of sending this email or text message to him, but I won the battle with myself and didn't. It helped that I was no where near the internet and I hid my purse and phone in a corner at my Aunt's house.

 

X,

 

I hope you and your family have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

 

Ok. Actually that's all I had planned to send. But since this isn't real, I will go on to say.

 

I hope the food is delicious. I know you will eat until you feel sick. I've missed you so much and I just wish that you still wanted me there with you and your family. I miss them so much. I hope you are happy now. I hope you will realize how much I love you and would do anything for you. I hope that you see what you let go and how special our love was. I hope when you think of me, you miss me. I know you have put so many new people in your life to forget about me. I hope they let you down. I hope you come back. But when you don't, I hope I can be happy for you. Either way, I'm thankful for the times we shared. I will always love you.

Posted
Umm, this time last year I was with my ex. lol. You're a bit off on your timeframes. I don't want to think about where I was this time of year last year, I had him for all the holidays, last year....

 

This is true, now that I think about it... but I don't think either of us were really that happy regardless..... :(

 

But hey, life is so much better now for both of us. :):love: We've both got great friends, you have your band, and I have... well, I have something, just not sure what it is yet. LOL

 

-tp

cuz that's what friends are for

Posted

i hope you ate with friends. I know you had to work in the morning, so i just hope you were around friends (or her, if you're back together), but that you wern't alone.

I remember how lovely our last 2 Thanksgivings were. I remember how much we looked forward to the rest of our lives together and how we gave thanks. I was with my family, I missed you so much. I love you.

Posted
Only 6 people had issues with NC today? Wow, we are doing a lot better than I thought!

 

I just wonder why so many threads where started today if we are doing this well :-)

 

Well, I hope everyone got through the day unscathed. I am happy to report that not only did I not contact my ex, I really didn't even consider it. He crossed my mind, sure, but it didn't hurt. That's good progress.

 

I was in Mexico sea kayaking. No computer. No toilet paper.

 

But otherwise:

 

The way you looked at me last Thanksgiving, was a way no woman has ever looked at me. No matter how many women I date, I can't seem to get close to them, and I know it is because of the pain you inflicted upon me and my resulting intimacy issues. I hope you are well, and I hope you have a boyfriend you love, because I would have wanted that for you. I only wish you could have given me what I wanted, those 3 words, "I am sorry."

 

Friends with benefits means "I am willing to **** you while keeping my options open until someone better comes along." The entire point is that when one person has feelings, sex needs to end
so
that person does not feel hurt or used. I felt USED. I felt OBJECTIFIED. Asking that of me DENIGRATED me as a person, my feelings for you, and our relationship. It made our relationship, which was significant for me because no one had ever said "Oppath, I love you" before, and I had not been in love in 7 years, a lie. Presumably, since you ended our relationship because you "needed to be single, despite all the feelings being there and if you wanted a relationship with anyone, it would be with" me, that meant you would date other men if they asked...therefore, you wanted to **** me while dating other guys. After all, that is the point of
FWB
: to have good sex until you meet someone you want a relationship with. That is what it means by definition. To ask that of me, after I politely told you FOUR TIMES "please don't contact me for a couple months. I will seek you out when I am ready for friendship, but it is too soon, I need space to heal, please give that space as I am too hurt to be your friend right now" was incredibly insensitive. To go from being the guy you thought you were going to marry to your **** buddy...hurt, especially given the context.

 

I expressed anger. You said "I was just joking." To me, that meant you were saying "Oppath, you, your feelings, and our relationship are a joke to me. It was all about the sex. You are a joke." To have someone you love say that to you is crushing.

 

Then I learned about Eric. All I can say is this... if I were to have an ex flying into town to see me, and I were to tell you "you can't call me" because I didn't want her to know about you to spare her feelings, and she were to hang out with me all day and ask me "are you dating someone" and I'd say "no", and she spent the night at my house, and some of my best friends did not know I had a
gf
and I wouldn't let you meet them...well, your friends would unequivocally say "Oppath is cheating on you." I felt small and INVISIBLE. Does that not sound sketchy? He essentially proposed to you the day you started acting distant, and you did not tell me about it. How was I not supposed to conclude he was a reason for the breakup? It was tangible that you weren't being honest with me. For you to ask me to be
FWB
after withholding that information from me, I felt MANIPULATED and EXPLOITED.

 

I've delivered you a half dozen apologies. I was sincere. I am
so
sorry for the scathing words I directed at you. Understand, I felt WORTHLESS, nothing more than a PIECE OF MEAT. No-one should feel USED, OBJECTIFIED, BELITTLED, INVISIBLE, BETRAYED, and that their relationship was FRAUDULENT, that it was JUST A JOKE.

 

Involving your friends was wrong, very wrong and immature of me, but I felt USED and cheated on, and you were not apologizing. All I wanted was to be told "I am sorry, that was insensitive of me." Those capitalized emotions were exactly how I felt, and they are why I erupted at you and threatened to tell Eric, because I could not cope with those feelings. Perhaps to you, they are totally irrational and psycho. I just couldn't understand how someone
so
sweet and caring could treat me like I was an inanimate object, how they could withhold information from me that could allow me to make a decision about my life. The result: I lost control. You weren't validating the hurt you had responsibility for,
so
I involved your friends, because I desperately needed an apology. I do suffer from clinical depression. I've been in therapy on-off for years. It sucks. You met me at a high point, when for the first time in my adult life, I believed I had worth. My core view of myself is that I am worthless, that I am a piece of ****, that I am unlovable. Those thoughts and feelings are powerful, they are more than a momentary blue. You treating me like an inanimate object confirmed those feelings, because someone who is lovable, someone who has value, is not treated that way. I would not treat someone as you treated me unless I had no respect for that person and wanted to hurt them.
Posted
I remember how thankful I was for you last year. I love you so much and would give anything to be with you this year, showing my friends how lucky and happy I was. I hope the girl you're with this year (and I'm assuming there is one; you're too beautiful for there not to be) is everything I wasn't, and that you are as thankful for her as I was for you this time last year. I wish I could have been what you wanted. I wish I could have been the one for whose love you gave thanks. I am so sorry I wasn't enough. I love you.

 

 

Beautiful Sedgwick,one day the person you fall in love with,will love you this way too.

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