someone3434 Posted November 20, 2007 Posted November 20, 2007 I started talking to my ex again about a month ago. Trying to do the whole friends thing. Started out as just an IM here and there and then a couple phone calls. I was near her work last week so we had lunch one day and had a good time. Friday we spent half the day together running an errand that I had to get done and having lunch. During the day she makes comments like "I'm not putting up my tree this year, not in the mood" and "My dad asked me if I was talking to any guys and I told him no, I didn't want anything to do with any guys". She calls me later that night and asks if I want to go to a movie with her. I say sure. I was so happy that day just being around her, talking with her and laughing with her. The next day her and some of her friends go out downtown. Husbands are friends of mine so we go out to eat and the girls ask us to meet them downtown. We meet them and we continue right where we left off, talking, laughing and having a great time. Couple of their friends from work show up and suddenly I'm no longer visible. Until the one guy she was talking to leaves to go talk to another girl. Now I've visible again. Until he comes back. The guys I'm with take me to another bar. I can already tell what is going on. We come back later to drive the girls home and everyone leaves except my ex who stays with the guy she was talking with and dancing with. That's probably the most painful thing anyone has ever done to me. It's not like she would have never had the chance to talk to this guy again, she freaking works with him. But instead of going home with us she stays knowing full well that I am there with everyone else. I have barely eaten anything in the last few days and feel like complete ****. I texted her when we left that night to "Have a nice life" and so far she hasn't tried to contact me. Which I think is good cause I really don't want to hear her voice or say anything to her but it hurts that she would do something like this and then just drop off from my life. Should have expected it I guess based on our history. Just wanted some of you to read this in case you are thinking about breaking NC with someone who broke up with you. Just me. It isn't worth the pain.
BetrayedMM Posted November 20, 2007 Posted November 20, 2007 I hear ya... In the past, if it was a serious relationship, I've never been able to do the 'just friends' thing. It would be simply too painful to see them again. Now that my marriage is falling apart, I don't know how I'm going to pull off NC... kids... The split hasn't happened yet, but at this point seems inevitable. I would very much like to go NC at this point to get myself back together, but she is still here. Since she is the cheater, and refusing to fully 'come clean', I just can't trust her at all, so, no matter how I feel about her, I know it won't work. And, when the time comes, it will be she who leaves- this was her choice not mine. But, I don't know how to go NC when you have kids. This is so hard... I feel for ya. It's something I've been able to steer clear from in the past. I hope to be able to avoid situations like that in the future, but I don't see how...
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