Author joel Posted November 21, 2007 Author Posted November 21, 2007 ya thats true. why pay for someone u barely to hardly even now. ppl say on this forum and even others -wait till ur richer finish school and have a better job lol hahah. lol i finish my school previously but no related field of work and even if i was to start i won;t be making much in the entry level job we all have to start as. the thing is why wait when ur richer, why not find a women or date now when she wants u for u and not what u can give and get her-that just such a turnoff. i mean its not like i'm going ot pay all the time, just sometimes. and who said the stuff u do has to always be $ and money related. tennis, hiking, coffee,golf, mini golf, even try out skiing , snowb , going to see a band play at a bar, its not all fine dining and eat out eat out. that just so boring after a while. i'm into sports and activities kind of guy, i luv b ball watch it and play it, so she better be sporty atheltic type too , not the oh oh mall and shopping all day type. and fashionable bit** are not my type. even when u grad from college its not even gurantee u goin find work in ur field. i have friend of friend who went to univ for bach in sci and found not work related and had to go back and do something else. bach in pscy =no job too. u think u finish u getting making tons of cash, if ur lucky. i finish my schooling in college for computers lookign for IT job and they pay like 12-15/hr -ya wait till i am rich and find the girl-if u want a money grubber materialistic girl-that such a turnoff
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 ya thats true. why pay for someone u barely to hardly even now. ppl say on this forum and even others -wait till ur richer finish school and have a better job lol hahah. lol i finish my school previously but no related field of work and even if i was to start i won;t be making much in the entry level job we all have to start as. the thing is why wait when ur richer, why not find a women or date now when she wants u for u and not what u can give and get her-that just such a turnoff. i mean its not like i'm going ot pay all the time, just sometimes. and who said the stuff u do has to always be $ and money related. tennis, hiking, coffee,golf, mini golf, even try out skiing , snowb , going to see a band play at a bar, its not all fine dining and eat out eat out. that just so boring after a while. i'm into sports and activities kind of guy, i luv b ball watch it and play it, so she better be sporty atheltic type too , not the oh oh mall and shopping all day type. and fashionable bit** are not my type. even when u grad from college its not even gurantee u goin find work in ur field. i have friend of friend who went to univ for bach in sci and found not work related and had to go back and do something else. bach in pscy =no job too. u think u finish u getting making tons of cash, if ur lucky. i finish my schooling in college for computers lookign for IT job and they pay like 12-15/hr -ya wait till i am rich and find the girl-if u want a money grubber materialistic girl-that such a turnoff You're turned off by "materialistic girls" but then you have issues shelling out a few dollars for coffee. Get selective and you'll limit your spending.
Sunblast Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Do what I do: Date 1: Brief coffee/etc, then if you're getting along after 15 minutes, go to activity #2 - something fun and sporty; Date 2: Fire at the beach at night, then go to your place, hook up; If you hook up, it's a good sign she likes you. Then don't call her for a bit, she'll call and like you more and go out some more -- now she's hooked and you can go spend money on her normally like on your friends If not, you aren't out much; give her another try in two weeks.
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Women all the time say that men like us are losers but women like me despite all the trash I talk about them. Women tend to respect a man who won't bow down to them and refusing to be a gentlemen to women I don't know is my act of resistance against feminism. It is not about the money but the principle and I hate feeling like I am being used.
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Don't confuse taking a stance of principle, to a lack of courtesy. Tonight, I held two consecutive doors open for a man who was behind me. He topped me by about a foot and probably outweighed me by a good 70+ lbs. He said thank-you twice...
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Don't confuse taking a stance of principle, to a lack of courtesy. Tonight, I held two consecutive doors open for a man who was behind me. He topped me by about a foot and probably outweighed me by a good 70+ lbs. He said thank-you twice... To me this all of protest makes me feel strong. It lets me know that feminism has yet to destroy me.
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 woggle, that makes as much sense as me feeling empowered over holding the door open for the big guy behind me. If anything, I was glad his face wasn't a permanent imprint, on the glass door.
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 woggle, that makes as much sense as me feeling empowered over holding the door open for the big guy behind me. If anything, I was glad his face wasn't a permanent imprint, on the glass door. It is very hard for you as a woman to understand where I am coming from. No disrespect to you personally but since women declared war on men back in the 1970s they have been telling us horrible we are and all the things they won't do for us and how we are useless testosterone infected creatures. They say and do these things but they still expect men to do all the gentlemenly things and many men in an effort to prove we are one of the good ones are happy to oblige them in an effort to prove we are one of the good ones but most women don't feel that a good man exists. I feel that if women want the gentlemen behavior they need to stop declaring war on the male gender. Then and only then will I hold a door open for a woman.
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 So I should have let both doors slam in his face? Because he and I should be at war?
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 So I should have let both doors slam in his face? Because he and I should be at war? No. You holding the door open for him is much different than him holding open the door for you.
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 woggle, reread the last five or so posts. Do you see what I see?
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 woggle, reread the last five or so posts. Do you see what I see? What do you see?
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Major double standards. Is this the person you want to be?
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Major double standards. Is this the person you want to be? We all have double standards and we all have contradictions.
Trialbyfire Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 I was afraid and sad that you would say something like that. Really think about it woggle. Who do you want to be? Someone like your Mom or someone who sees life clearly? Please don't answer me. Answer yourself.
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 I was afraid and sad that you would say something like that. Really think about it woggle. Who do you want to be? Someone like your Mom or someone who sees life clearly? Please don't answer me. Answer yourself. I am nothing like my mother.
Nevermind Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Wow. Major war of the sexes going on around here. On-topic: It's hard for me to define a rule as to who has to pay what. In general, however, I agree with what has been said in this thread before: If you're asking you need to be PREPARED to pay. Especially is you are assking out a stranger. You don't know anything about the other person, except that she/he just offered to spend some time with you. Maybe this person has had some financial drawbacks in the last time, just moved to the area without a great salary, etc. It doesn't matter, really. You asked, they are giving you their time and attention, don't expect them to go the entire way. The date (and yes, it is a date if it has not been established to be otherwise) was your idea, you planned it, you had the options to make it fit your income. I, personally, never went on a date without having the means to pay for all of it. Just to make me feel better and more secure. If the date goes on and we go to a second place, or have an ice-cream in the park, well I'll pay for it. joel, however, should really reconsider his attitude towards women and dating. Or, to put it in his words, he's like a 3 when it comes to charactre. Battle of the sexes: whooah! Woggle, trying to put men down? Defeat you? Gosh, it makes me think of an armee of feminists, guns loaded, coming after all mankind. Tz. I stand up for people who are a)old, b)pregnant, c) carrying heavy weights (so they could put them on the ground or on the seat) d) anyone who looks like he/she really needs to sit down. So, yes, women win by one because men so seldomly get pregnant. Rules to open doors: when I am going through one and a person is close behind, help her/him through it. If someone is a bit away, but in reasonable distance, and carrying something, pushing a baby cart, help might be appreciated. Etc. I always try to carry heavy stuff myself, even if it hurts sometime, but I except help offered from people (men included, gosh!) stronger than me. It is called courtesy. Men and Women are equal, but different. Exceptiong what we are and what we can do (from both sides) is the real thing behind feminism, for me. To drop all manners (in times of war) is plain stupid. You want to be treated nice, tread others nice. Aw, anyway. Trialbyfire put it in much shorter and better words than I did.
jcster Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 It is very hard for you as a woman to understand where I am coming from. No disrespect to you personally but since women declared war on men back in the 1970s they have been telling us horrible we are and all the things they won't do for us and how we are useless testosterone infected creatures. They say and do these things but they still expect men to do all the gentlemenly things and many men in an effort to prove we are one of the good ones are happy to oblige them in an effort to prove we are one of the good ones but most women don't feel that a good man exists. I feel that if women want the gentlemen behavior they need to stop declaring war on the male gender. Then and only then will I hold a door open for a woman. Are you brain damaged? 'Cause, it's ok...I just thought you might be. I think I'm going to be kind to you from now on. You're really not quite right. Rock on, dude.
luvmy2ns Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Why would most women get pissed off at that statement? I agree with it and everything that you said about it. I'm one of the women who won't approach first, call first or any of that stuff. I just don't want to and I don't have to. I certainly don't "have to" either as I get approached by men often, but I'm also not so insecure to think that a guy's gonna shut me down if I ask and, if he did, that it would scar me for life. I was done with puberty and all its emotions long ago.
luvmy2ns Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 The more people you date the higher your probability of finding the one who is right for you. Hence, the reason I sometimes have done the approaching.
luvmy2ns Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 I am nothing like my mother. If you would willingly drop a door in ANYONE's face, male or female, you sound to be JUST like your mother. No common courtesy or caring about anyone outside of the circumference of your own cranium.
Woggle Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 I never said that I would slam a door in a woman's face but she gets the same treatment a man would. I won't let a door slam in her face but I also won't let her pass before me.
luvmy2ns Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 I never said that I would slam a door in a woman's face but she gets the same treatment a man would. I won't let a door slam in her face but I also won't let her pass before me. Well, then, we're on exactly the same page aren't we? I don't expect, nor do I want, a man to pander to me just because I'm a female. I'm perfectly capable of doing many things on my own. I actually find women who "use" their femininity as a crutch, pretending to be helpless, to be rather pathetic. I know how to prime my own oil furnace, change my tires, top off the oil in my car, etc. etc. and am more than willing to do those things. I was the one who got the tiller to run again in the spring when it was out of commission. I just think whoever invites a stranger out for a drink or a coffee to "get to know one another" should be the one who pays. If you find you enjoy each other's company and stay for more drinks, then probably there should be some alternating of being the one to buy. But this guy invites this gal out to an expensive place for coffee then gets all bent when she wonders why he didn't offer to buy for her when the whole thing was his idea. I don't get that.
tanbark813 Posted November 21, 2007 Posted November 21, 2007 Why would most women get pissed off at that statement? I agree with it and everything that you said about it. Well you're also more level-headed than a lot of women.
Racquel Colette Posted November 24, 2007 Posted November 24, 2007 It's just the way it's done. If you are interested in a woman, you ask her out and you pay. It was very rude of you not to pay for the young lady that you asked to hang out with you. You state you just basically used her to have someone to hang out with. Well, when you ask a woman to go for lunch, you are asking her out. So, expect to pay. I think you would rather hang on to your precious $5 or $10 to pay for a lunch than date, so it's better if you just stick to not dating. That is my advice.
Recommended Posts