konfuzd Posted November 17, 2007 Posted November 17, 2007 Ok, I was just awakened from a nap to a phone call from a friend who just asked me out on a date. I was kinda foggy from the sudden awakening, and accepted, not even realising what was going on. The thing is, I'm really not attracted to this guy at all. We've only hung out in group settings before, never one on one. My friends have all told me he has a crush on me, but I never really thought much of it. Besides having mutual friends, we really have nothing in common. I really want to get out of this, but I don't want to hurt his feelings. He's expressed to me in the past that he hasn't been on a date in over 3 years. I really don't want to cancel, for fear of hurting his feelings, but at the same time, I don't want to give him the wrong idea. I don't know what to do. We always have fun when we are hanging out in a group. I definately respect him as a person, and don't want to lose his friendship, but I know that everything is going to be awkward from this point forward no matter what.... What can I do?
Dynamo Posted November 17, 2007 Posted November 17, 2007 Ok, I was just awakened from a nap to a phone call from a friend who just asked me out on a date. I was kinda foggy from the sudden awakening, and accepted, not even realising what was going on. The thing is, I'm really not attracted to this guy at all. We've only hung out in group settings before, never one on one. My friends have all told me he has a crush on me, but I never really thought much of it. Besides having mutual friends, we really have nothing in common. I really want to get out of this, but I don't want to hurt his feelings. He's expressed to me in the past that he hasn't been on a date in over 3 years. I really don't want to cancel, for fear of hurting his feelings, but at the same time, I don't want to give him the wrong idea. I don't know what to do. We always have fun when we are hanging out in a group. I definately respect him as a person, and don't want to lose his friendship, but I know that everything is going to be awkward from this point forward no matter what.... What can I do? Try and convert it from a 1on1 date to a group activity. Call him up, and say something like "Hey is it alright if some of my friends come too, I'd made plans to hang out with them that day and I don't want to just abandon them, haha". Maybe not exactly that, but just something to get it more like a group atmosphere. This is assuming he's not taking you to a fancy dinner or something.. You already commited to the date so honestly it'd just be rude on your part to back out, so I say just try and make the best of it you can. If he tries to make moves on you just tell him you really only like him as a friend, simple as that.
Author konfuzd Posted November 17, 2007 Author Posted November 17, 2007 That is a great plan. Thank you! I think I will invite a couple more people.
Krytie TV Posted November 17, 2007 Posted November 17, 2007 That is a great plan. Thank you! I think I will invite a couple more people. Except that won't address the issue. If he's oblivious to where you are at in this, that probably won't be enough and you will be in this same situation again. You need to tell him. Making it a group thing is only a bandaid, it doesn't fix what's going on and will just delay things.
Trialbyfire Posted November 17, 2007 Posted November 17, 2007 Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, otherwise you'll be dodging future date requests...
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