frannie Posted December 3, 2007 Posted December 3, 2007 Hey, BKRPM, good to see you posting. I have often wondered what became of your affair and whether you were still seeing her.
BKRPM Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 Hi Frannie- I'm still kind of in the affair (at least still emotionally), but I am trying my darndest to get out. I have had a lot of really good dates lately (not in last month, tho'). Unfortunately the last few didn't last not because I wasn't interested, but either the women weren't, or had issues that they were dealing with. Sadly, I just know that I will be dealing with MW until one of us leaves our place of work. MW, because she doesn't have the gumption to leave H, has resorted to overmedicating herself and drinking too much. The other night MW got drunk and talked about "picking a date where she could end her life." Very scary stuff. When I try to help her not abuse herself, she tells me that I am judging her. Friends, I do love MW, but I pray to God that I will find someone that will allow me to stop thinking about her. BKR PM
frannie Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 BKR I'm sorry to hear about what your MW is going through, and how that's affecting you. But it's good to hear you're dating and thinking of moving out of that job, if that's what it takes to be free. Very sad that you might have to leave a place that you've been at for years, however. Is there no other way to protect yourself from her (if you know what I mean) or do you work closely?
Chrome Barracuda Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 Hi Frannie- I'm still kind of in the affair (at least still emotionally), but I am trying my darndest to get out. I have had a lot of really good dates lately (not in last month, tho'). Unfortunately the last few didn't last not because I wasn't interested, but either the women weren't, or had issues that they were dealing with. Sadly, I just know that I will be dealing with MW until one of us leaves our place of work. MW, because she doesn't have the gumption to leave H, has resorted to overmedicating herself and drinking too much. The other night MW got drunk and talked about "picking a date where she could end her life." Very scary stuff. When I try to help her not abuse herself, she tells me that I am judging her. Friends, I do love MW, but I pray to God that I will find someone that will allow me to stop thinking about her. BKR PM You know BK you shouldnt get another piece of woman to cover up the one you just lost, stop being weak and just move on. You should be strong enough to realize that she's married!!! She isnt yours! She's taken. Why cant you get that in your head? Why do you hang on to a woman who's obviously not gonna leave her husband to be with you? Why accept crumbs from this woman? I feel sorry for you because you say your heart is telling you, that's BS, you are in control of your own body and emotions and you should get a hold of them. Make more rational decisions. but I appauld you for taking the steps to move away from a toxic situation!
Meaplus3 Posted December 5, 2007 Posted December 5, 2007 Most threads here seem to be from the POV of OWs, so this may be a slightly unusual post. I'm an OM in a R with a woman who, while not yet married, has been engaged for several years and in a R for 10. To cut a long story short, I had been attracted to her for a couple of years but had avoided her because she was engaged - until she told me of her plan to return to her country with her fiance. It brought my feelings into focus and after telling her how I felt we began an A - guiltily and painfully. It turns out that her relationship with her BF is more of a caring friendship with no chemistry while we have a passionate, emotionally communicative R. In other important ways we are also much better suited. I don't judge her for cheating and I believe she is in a more difficult position than me, having to choose between the familiar and comfortable and the exciting but difficult. She's asked for time to think about what she wants from life - I know she has feelings for me that go beyond just a fling and I've assured her that I'm in this seriously. I'm just curious about whether any other OMs have been in this situation and whether anyone here has ever left a LTR for their OM? And am I being a fool for hoping this could work out? I would do a search on Rating's guy, I believe you will get lot's of insight from his thread's. Good luck. AP:)
BettyBoop Posted December 7, 2007 Posted December 7, 2007 I will not judge your love for an engaged woman. However, the fact that she cheats on you instead of breaking it off with her fiancé to think things through says A LOT about her character. If a woman really wanted to be with you, and really was only "roomates" with her fiancé...she would leave him regardless of her involvement with you. The longer she keeps you waiting...the more assured you can be that she is playing you both.
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