RoseRen Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 My story was already posted in the Other Man / Woman forum - http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t132107/ Forgive me, but I don't even have the mindframe to rewrite it, so a just copy-pasting with minor amendments. ================== I fell in love with my best friend. But our relationship was not accepted by our parents, as we are born and brought up in a very traditional country- India - and we are from different religions. Eventully we got married 2 years ago, without much pomp and show. Only very few close relatives knew about our marriage. I was a diagnosed with cancer a year before we got married. And just months before our marriage, I moved to a different country for work and radiotherapy and financial aid. My husband was not in a position to provide financially for me, then. During this period we had a long distance relationship. But months after our marriage, we started having relationship issues - mostly due to my insecurities and his financial concerns. Then last November, we had a big misunderstanding. It was about some mail he had send to some girl and she forwarding that to me and all. It was such a stupid reason to fight over when I think of it now. After this fight, in a few days I moved into the hospital for my therapy. I didn't inform him of this. I did want to get in touch with him and appologise, but my friends suggested staying away from him would do me and my health good. Their suggestion was that if I could give him some space, and be less clingy, it would be better. Every terrible night in the hospital I spend with the hope that he would get in touch with me and everything would be OK. But no miracles happened. Then in May, when I was out of hospital, I contacted him and apologised. But he seemed a bit reluctant to have me back. I knew instantly that something as wrong and that he was acting his best to hate me and make me hate him. So I started doing a bit of investigation of what was happening --- and discovered that he had married someone else - "under the pressure of his parents" (his bro's version) and "financial issues" (his version). (Now we have different marriage laws in India, and since both the marriages were registered under different laws, no issue was there for him to get married without a divorce.) But the instant thought I had in my mind was - may be he thought I would die of cancer, and thought he would move on in life. Or may be because I didn't call him and apologise sooner, he thought I hated him. Whatever the reason was, I ended up feeling hurt. I tried in vain to let go of the relationship, but I couldn't. My friends suggested that I could sue him, because we were not technically divorced. But suing him won't bring him back to me, would it? After a couple of months of his marriage, he moved to a different country leaving his wife behind in his native. He kept in touch with me and he promised me he would come back to me, provided I don't bring up anything abt his second marriage ever. I promised him I would - but keep failing miserably everyday. Then I went to meet him in person in August, and I discovered something else. He has erectile disfunction. He didn't have the courage to mention this to anyone, but this had started long long ago. He again asked me if I still wanted to be with him. And I answered "yes". ================
hollaxatholly Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 So, whats the question here?? and ...what does erectile dysfunction have to do with your husband being married to someone else? I would almost think this was like...some kind of made up story...but I don't want you to take it the wrong way. and...I really, really don't think suing him will bring him back to you, think about it, how much would someone doing that to you make you love them??! No way would it bring up nice feelings from me...I'd seriously consider that before taking this step, I'd make sure you don't want him back...because that seems like a definite sign that you no longer want him in my opinion...
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