ccarmon09 Posted November 14, 2007 Posted November 14, 2007 My ex girlfriend broke up with me over a year ago now and as I have made great strides toward normalcy everything really hasn't gotten back to bein normal. I talked to her periodically throught that last 15 months but did my best to ignore her. I defriended her on facebook and did my best to change any kind of conversation that sparked about her. She was my first and only love and I still lover her to this day. I talked to her recently when she sent me a message and it brought back the feelings again. I am tired of thinking about her and feeling this way and I don't know what to do anymore. Things just aren't the same and don't seem as if they will ever be.
Crestfallen_KH Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Don't beat yourself up. The "timeline" of how long it takes us to get over a past love can depend. For some, a year is enough, for others it's not. Have you engaged in constructive activities that have helped you heal? Have you considered therapy, read self-help books, examined the past relationship to see what you would not do in a future relationships, or something along these lines? Sometimes if we just "exist" but don't actively make attempts to grow after the breakup, it can impede the healing process. It could also be that you have healed, but you just hit one of your triggers. Even today, I have certain triggers that make me think of guys I dated 10 years ago and only for two months. It's just part of your history. However, if you've been reset and are completely devastated again, that might be a clue that you still have more healing to do. Just something to think about!
ovoquente Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I feel your pain bro, it's always hard to get over your first love, and by the looks of things she must be occupying most of your thinking space. In the mean time, you need to distract yourself with other things such as seek your passion, give more time into your hobbies or have something to look forward to like set every weekend as guys night out with your buddies. Get into things that you are really into, this might be the time you need to do so and it couldn't come into anymore handier time. Remember that you were doing fine before you met her. You'll get over her eventually, time heals all wounds but if you tamper it much than you should, it will only take longer to heal.
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