dbtmarley Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 I agree but this board and most others are heavily balanced in the woman's favor so I provide balance. Woggle is the great balance man of Loveshack. Okie dokie! You guys tell each other this kind of crap to justify being bitter and I for one am sick of it. So true! It is a trap I myself try to keep from doing. Often wonder if I need therapy for feelings held over from my ex's infidelity.
sumdude Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 I'm not asking you to just believe! Google it! It is a very true fact. Think about it. We learn not only our parenting, but also our relationship skills from our fathers and mothers. When the parents fail to teach committment, you have to learn this on your own. Most never do! I tend to agree but can't make a blanket statement about it. I just learned from experience. My exes family - Sister married H1, left H1 for H2, years later left H2 to go back to H1.. Dad had been married 4 times or so... Dad had affairs while married to mom Mom left dad AND the kids (with gd reason) but with no warning my ex left me with no warning My Family - All known ancestors - 'till death do us part Brother , married 15 yrs Sister , unmarried (unhappily I add) Cousins, all but one still married. I was commiited for life, accepting her faults...and totally faithful. Yes imperfect with some faults... went through a very hard period soon after the wedding.. less than 2 yrs of the hard times she goes poof... had to learn the quick exit strategy somewhere.. In the grand scheme of life 2 yrs of hard times is nothing ... but our society doesn't think long term anymore.
bish Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 Assume much? I divorced my exhusband because he was sent to federal prison. LOL..would have been good information to know Ya need to be more clear...you made it sound as if it was simply because you were young.
blind_otter Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 LOL..would have been good information to know Ya need to be more clear...you made it sound as if it was simply because you were young. Well I wouldn't have married someone with the potential to go to federal prison if I wasn't young and dumb.
Cobra_X30 Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 You guys tell each other this kind of crap to justify being bitter and I for one am sick of it. As I said earlier... we learn by association, and when we are hurt, self defence mechanisms are built to protect us from associated situations. Those who cheat often rely on situations and external factors to determine thier faithfulness. You have developed internal control, and are thus anchored down, instead of changing direction with the wind.
Krytie TV Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 Not always the case. You should give people the benefit of the doubt. People can change. I know a couple of people who have actually learned from their mistakes and been faithful after. It's juts unfortunate one of their mistakes was with me.
Trialbyfire Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 Anyone can change if it matters enough to them and the consequences of their actions impacted sufficiently to make them realize who and what they really are. The risk someone takes for giving this type of person a second or billionth chance is that you empower their behaviour because there are no consequences to their actions.
bish Posted November 13, 2007 Posted November 13, 2007 Well I wouldn't have married someone with the potential to go to federal prison if I wasn't young and dumb. Why not?...my stbXW is, and she is 34.
Pyro Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I know a couple of people who have actually learned from their mistakes and been faithful after. It's juts unfortunate one of their mistakes was with me. That is unfortunate that it happened. Hang in there, someone better will come along. More proof that people are capable of changing.
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 RED FLAGS: Top Five- 1.Mention of issues with her father or parents. I wonder if I've ever been written off because of this......
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I wonder if I've ever been written off because of this...... Yeah, I'm royally screwed if most men think that way
Pyro Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Yeah, I'm royally screwed if most men think that way I wouldn't consider that a red flag. I don't have the greatest relationship with my parents and I am fine....for the most part at least.
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I wouldn't consider that a red flag. I don't have the greatest relationship with my parents and I am fine....for the most part at least. Yeah... me too... I've turned out great
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I wouldn't consider that a red flag. I don't have the greatest relationship with my parents and I am fine....for the most part at least. Well, honestly I CAN understand why a girl having "daddy issues" could potentially cause some problems in a relationship. I've never really had a father figure though, so I don't have an example to follow...good or bad.
Pyro Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Well, honestly I CAN understand why a girl having "daddy issues" could potentially cause some problems in a relationship. I've never really had a father figure though, so I don't have an example to follow...good or bad. What kind of daddy issues are you referring to?
johan Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I've never really had a father figure though, so I don't have an example to follow...good or bad. I'll be your father figure.
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Well, honestly I CAN understand why a girl having "daddy issues" could potentially cause some problems in a relationship. I've never really had a father figure though, so I don't have an example to follow...good or bad. Same here. I don't count my father as an actual dad, he sure as hell desn't treat me as his daughter
squeak Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I'll be your father figure. hahaha yeah except I doubt Stargazers real name is Luke...and oh this just sounds so wrong!! :0
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Same here. I don't count my father as an actual dad, he sure as hell desn't treat me as his daughter I literally had no father. Nothing. Nada. Just my mom and grammy and I, and all of our female pets. A testosterone-free home.
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I literally had no father. Nothing. Nada. Just my mom and grammy and I, and all of our female pets. A testosterone-free home. Aww Even only female pets? They gave you NO chance did they?
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Aww Even only female pets? They gave you NO chance did they? Nope. The closest I came to having a father figure in my life was with my Godfather... who is flaming gay.
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Nope. The closest I came to having a father figure in my life was with my Godfather... who is flaming gay. I thought you said A flaming gay... quite rude IMO rofl
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I thought you said A flaming gay... quite rude IMO rofl I did, didn't I? I mean, he's gay. VERY gay!
Citizen Erased Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 I did, didn't I? I mean, he's gay. VERY gay! Sorry, it's just over here flaming can also be like saying "he's bloody gay", like damn he is. Very weird lingo in upside down land
Star Gazer Posted November 15, 2007 Posted November 15, 2007 Sorry, it's just over here flaming can also be like saying "he's bloody gay", like damn he is. Very weird lingo in upside down land Ah, gotcha!
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