isntitironic Posted November 10, 2007 Posted November 10, 2007 So I was hanging out with some girls tonight and here is what they had to say. Girls love sex and are just as much as whores as men are. They have just as much going on the side, downlow or whatever if not more then men. Nothing can change what happens to a girl down low when they are attracted to someone. And these days women have no reason to hold back. They portray themselves as sweet little angels because of the hypocracy of our society and the need for social acceptability. If this is true why can't women just come out with it? That way I don't have to be a goddamn mindreader and never know what I'm getting myself into. Any comments?
bigheartkindsoul Posted November 10, 2007 Posted November 10, 2007 Any comments - yes know your subject. Women are not allowed to admit opening there love of sex because we are told that is not socially acceptable and get called allsorts of names funnily enough like whores just like you have said above!! So thats why we can't & don't tend too. Same as you are groomed not to cry in public because it to society it makes you look a whimp. And yes we do have to hold back because if guys get sex straight away then they bugger off never too been seen again in most cases. I wish I could just sleep with a guy straight away if I want but we cannot. So take a good look at yourself before you start on women.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 10, 2007 Posted November 10, 2007 So I was hanging out with some girls tonight and here is what they had to say. Girls love sex and are just as much as whores as men are. They have just as much going on the side, downlow or whatever if not more then men. Nothing can change what happens to a girl down low when they are attracted to someone. And these days women have no reason to hold back. They portray themselves as sweet little angels because of the hypocracy of our society and the need for social acceptability. If this is true why can't women just come out with it? That way I don't have to be a goddamn mindreader and never know what I'm getting myself into. Any comments? Being sexually promiscuous and loving sex don't necessarily go hand-in-hand.
Author isntitironic Posted November 10, 2007 Author Posted November 10, 2007 I would just like to say that I am not leaning into or looking to offend women. The word whore was used verbatim by the girl I was having this conversation with. I was brought up in a traditional Italian household and am just thinking that maybe I have women figured wrong. If they want to be sexualy liberated and promiscuous fine. I just tink it sucks that when i meet someone I don't know what I'm getting myself into or how to aproach the relationship because she is trying to put a socialy acceptable front on when in fact maybe she has a couple fwb and would like me to be another. Or maybe she realy is a monogomos type and I'm assuming she isn't. The worse part of it all is when I try to talk to women I am seeing about this stuff it ofcourse destroys the mood for them. I would just like to understand more what is realy going on these days in the dating pool because it just seems like allot of smoke and mirrors and sex. The girls I talked to said the reason women don't like to talk about this stuff with the person they are involved is because they don't want to feel like a slut but they want to act like one. Maybe these girls I was with last night wouldn't be considered nice but some peoples standards but the seem the most real because the aren't hiding behind any social hypocracy. And good call on the crying thing bigheart. Fact is women don't like to see a man cry. They may tell you they do but subconsiously they find unattractive and can turn them right off. If Frank Sinatra could cry, then damn it I will cry.
bigheartkindsoul Posted November 10, 2007 Posted November 10, 2007 I would just like to understand more what is realy going on these days in the dating pool because it just seems like allot of smoke and mirrors and sex. The girls I talked to said the reason women don't like to talk about this stuff with the person they are involved is because they don't want to feel like a slut but they want to act like one. Wouldn't we all, its hardly easy for women or men, its all the same. We do not understand each other, if we did there would not be the massive industry there is on books such as Men are from Mars Women are from Venus. But imagine if you knew everything from the first date, kinda makes it boring and takes away any mystery. Just go with it and stop judging girls/women, and if you didn't want to offend then don't use liking sex and whore in the same sentance.
Author isntitironic Posted November 10, 2007 Author Posted November 10, 2007 OH MY GOD I am not judging see this is what I'm talking about. If your such a free spirit then why can't you talk freely about it? When I was younger I was taught to be deathly scared of diseases, never lie to your significant other, be only with them, possibly marry them or move on to the next. These days everything is the total oposite. Am I supposed to just assume that all women are full of crap now? I'm trying to understand what is going on and what are things gonna be like ten years from now? Whatever happend to having respect for the other persons feelings? How foolish do people look when other people know whats going on and that person doesn't. Are we just a society that does everything our body tells us to do now?
Ocean-Blue Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 I agree that people in general should let loose a bit and be more honest about their sexual urges. But you have to keep in mind that not everyone wants to spill all upon the first meeting. Me, personally...I like to REALLY get to know a guy before I even think about anything intimate with him - there must be commitment and a sense of "this is going somewhere". I am not a fan of casual sex. I'm a little confused as to what you are trying to say (based on your last post). Do you think women should be more forthcoming or that they are too keen to satisfy their bodily urges?
norajane Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 And good call on the crying thing bigheart. Fact is women don't like to see a man cry. They may tell you they do but subconsiously they find unattractive and can turn them right off.So you do understand...just change a few words around and you'll see it more clearly: "And good call on the promiscuous thing. Fact is, men don't like women who are promiscuous. They may tell you they do, but subconsciously they find it unattractive and it can turn them right off." Many guys only want women to want sex with them. If she f*cks around a lot with other guys, she's not someone he's going to want as a gf, wife, or mother to his children. All he might want a promiscuous woman for is a screw. So most women hold back if they actually want a relationship with a guy. And guys don't want a woman who is more promiscuous or experienced than they themselves are. They hate it if she's got a higher "number" than them.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 So you do understand...just change a few words around and you'll see it more clearly: "And good call on the promiscuous thing. Fact is, men don't like women who are promiscuous. They may tell you they do, but subconsciously they find it unattractive and it can turn them right off." Many guys only want women to want sex with them. If she f*cks around a lot with other guys, she's not someone he's going to want as a gf, wife, or mother to his children. All he might want a promiscuous woman for is a screw. So most women hold back if they actually want a relationship with a guy. And guys don't want a woman who is more promiscuous or experienced than they themselves are. They hate it if she's got a higher "number" than them. Hear! Hear!
bigheartkindsoul Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 I would just like to say that I am not leaning into or looking to offend women. The word whore was used verbatim by the girl I was having this conversation with. I was brought up in a traditional Italian household and am just thinking that maybe I have women figured wrong. If they want to be sexualy liberated and promiscuous fine. I just tink it sucks that when i meet someone I don't know what I'm getting myself into or how to aproach the relationship because she is trying to put a socialy acceptable front on when in fact maybe she has a couple fwb and would like me to be another. Or maybe she realy is a monogomos type and I'm assuming she isn't. The worse part of it all is when I try to talk to women I am seeing about this stuff it ofcourse destroys the mood for them. I would just like to understand more what is realy going on these days in the dating pool because it just seems like allot of smoke and mirrors and sex. The girls I talked to said the reason women don't like to talk about this stuff with the person they are involved is because they don't want to feel like a slut but they want to act like one. Maybe these girls I was with last night wouldn't be considered nice but some peoples standards but the seem the most real because the aren't hiding behind any social hypocracy. And good call on the crying thing bigheart. Fact is women don't like to see a man cry. They may tell you they do but subconsiously they find unattractive and can turn them right off. If Frank Sinatra could cry, then damn it I will cry. See you just said it yourself in there....."doesn't want to feel like a slut but whats to act like one" So you are saying that if they are indeed highly sexually active this makes them a slut, so now do you see why we cannot be open about it, because of comments and name calling like that. So you just answered your own question. Why is it acting like a slut for women when they have had a few sexual partners, yet if men have the same amount hey no problem and more so NO NAME CALLING? Yet if a guy did it, well either nothing is said, or his mates pat him on the back or no women could ever comment on the number of women he had slept with, we just are not allowed an opinion about it. And women can be nice and sexually active you know, just because they like sex doesn't make them nasty. You like society needs to change there way of thinking not be so narrow minded and name calling when referring to women who like sex as much as men.
Author isntitironic Posted November 11, 2007 Author Posted November 11, 2007 Well i guess in the end I just wish men or women didn't have to wear these masks and hide whatever emotions they are having. I don't understand why we can't accept eachother for who we are
sumdude Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 Perhaps we're just fighting milliions of years of evolution. Technology and changes in society have happened so fast yet the old animal brain has it's own programming. Sex has a much much smaller risk and investment for a man than a woman. A guy can get his rocks off and take off to the next willing participant. On the other hand for 1 - 60 minutes of pleasure the woman might end up pregnant with the next 15 - 20 years tied up. Enter the pill .... changed all the rules but the old programming is still there. Some interseting studies on the effects of the pill have come out. Women seem to be attracted to different men depending on if they are on or off the pill. Some may lose attraction for the man they are with once they stop taking it. Hormones are some powerful things..
brothermartin Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 I think what it boils down to is individual ethics and morals. The best way I've found to deal with the hypocracy and labeling is to just be true to yourself, or being comfotable in your own skin. When you can be real and honest with yourself and with other people about who you are, anyone else's labels or opinions dont bother you. They dont know you as a whole, so how can one person's opinion make you doubt yourself? Never judge yourself as other people might judge you. They dont have an accurate veiw of you because they dont know you as well as you can know yourself. And never judge people on a whole based on one thing you might know about them. One thing dose not make a person, many things do.
Racquel Colette Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 Ummm, OK, you are saying that women enjoy sex. Sorry, this is not a big newsflash or anything. Just because a woman enjoys sex, doesn't mean she should just go and have sex. Men know that women enjoy sex. However, it really doesn't work for a relationship if she is becoming intimate right away with a man. You should really get to know a man a month or so, and be exclusive. There is so much more to love making than sex, when you have a true connection with a man in a monogamous relationship, you will never want to have just 'sex' again. It means so much more than just a sex act itself. I don't get your point here.
Trialbyfire Posted November 11, 2007 Posted November 11, 2007 So I was hanging out with some girls tonight and here is what they had to say. Girls love sex(1) and are just as much as whores as men are(2). They have just as much going on the side, downlow or whatever if not more then men. Nothing can change what happens to a girl down low when they are attracted to someone. And these days women have no reason to hold back. They portray themselves as sweet little angels because of the hypocracy of our society and the need for social acceptability(3). If this is true why can't women just come out with it(4)? That way I don't have to be a goddamn mindreader and never know what I'm getting myself into. Any comments? Yes, most girls love sex but personal wiring will dictate if it's enmasse or exclusive.Not all men or women are whores.What is a sweet little angel, someone who's not wired to want to do anyone they find attractive? If so, there's no hypocricy.I don't love sex. I love making love with someone I care about. Jumping into bed with any dick that wanders by is a completely revolting thought to me.
Philbert Posted November 12, 2007 Posted November 12, 2007 This conversation reminds me of a time in highschool when a couple of the girls were going around before class asking all the guys if they masturbate. When they came to me I said "why, do you?" (or something to that effect) and she looked mortified and horribly offended saying "I'm a girl, girls don't do that". I found it pretty funny.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 12, 2007 Posted November 12, 2007 This conversation reminds me of a time in highschool when a couple of the girls were going around before class asking all the guys if they masturbate. When they came to me I said "why, do you?" (or something to that effect) and she looked mortified and horribly offended saying "I'm a girl, girls don't do that". I found it pretty funny. Considering that this occurred during high school, are you surprised?
Philbert Posted November 12, 2007 Posted November 12, 2007 Well she asked me, it only seemed fair that I could ask the same, equality and all.
Ocean-Blue Posted November 12, 2007 Posted November 12, 2007 Well she asked me, it only seemed fair that I could ask the same, equality and all. But of course! Bear in mind however that this was high school (a time when discussing one's sexuality is equivalent to social suicide).
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