Phoenix11 Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 I'm so confused....Here's my story....met this guy online....IM, email, texted, and talked on phone for 2 weeks. Made a real connection....we couldn't wait to speak to each other everyday. Finally decided to meet...casually....met...he kissed my hand...I gave him a hug...and off to dinner we went. At dinner he held my hand, caressed my leg....stared into my eyes....I'm blushing and loving it...right. We walk back to the car and parked by riverside to look at the pretty lights on the bridge...started to hug, kiss, hug, kiss....blah blah blah.....this went on for 2 hours....yikes....but nothing raunchy or sexual. Parting words were 1) Call me when you get home so I know you made safely (we arrived in separate cars), and 2) let's plan something for next weekend. Great Get home he texted me and said Good Night Beauty - kisses. Sounds good right... Next day....no contact until after lunch....unusal....conversation is polite...almost to polite. We asked each other what we thought of the evening...his words...."had a wonderful time, with a beautiful women....my response ditto. OK...a low in conversation....agreed it was ackward. I suggested...hmmm you think we should take a break (not expecting him to say what he said). His response was "let me think"....I'm thinking....well ok.....for a few days. I was shocked. Me said OK. Two day go my...I try to call cell phone....straight to voice mail....try to call house phone....straight to voice mail. Left message...no return call....It's been 4 days know... Did taking a break really mean much more than that. I'm confused, hurt, sadden...and I want to burn his house down....just kidding. Please clue me in:confused:
Phateless Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 maybe he thought you were serious when you suggested taking a break???
Author Phoenix11 Posted November 9, 2007 Author Posted November 9, 2007 "Maybe he thought I was seriou about taking a break"...possibly. But my actions since have suggested otherwise. I texted him saying i missed talking to him and I missed his voice....I don't get the no response position he is taking..... Insight please?
Phateless Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 i think you should just tell him you were kidding and didn't mean for it to go this way. he was just trying not to seem insecure when you suggested taking a break. if he got all needy and said "nooo, bad idea" he'd look needy and desperate so of course he can't do that. were you teasing him by saying we should take a break? or were you expecting him to go along and say "ooooh yeah, we're terrible for each other :p" either way, just explain yourself and fix it.
Author Phoenix11 Posted November 9, 2007 Author Posted November 9, 2007 how can I explain when he won't take my phone call and doesn't reply to my text msg or phone msg. I did text him and jokingly asked " are we still on break "..I miss you....I got zip, nothing, nada.
Phateless Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 i don't know sweetie... you kinda screwed yourself by being the one who suggested it... not really sure at this point. maybe send one email explaining yourself and then let it drop, chalk it up to a lesson learned
Author Phoenix11 Posted November 9, 2007 Author Posted November 9, 2007 I guess you are right....lesson learned....but it hurts soo much...
uniqueone Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 I guess I don't understand why you asked him if you thought you should take a break. Where did that come from? Due to a lull in the conversation? That's rather preemptive of you. It either says to him a lack of much interest on your part or it says to him you're showing insecurity. But you expressed how you felt and that's natural to do. The problem is, we are supposed to hide how we feel at the beginning of a dating situation. You're supposed to be light and breezy and pretend. This is why dating can suck...at least for those of us who aren't very good at being light and breezy and pretending. But before you start thinking that you screwed things up.....I sorta wonder about this guy. He sounds like Mr. Prince Charming (aka The Charmer) "Good Night Beauty --kisses" Uh-huh....Yeeeah.....this one's a good one, isn't he? These types seem almost magical. Unfortunately, don't forget that there's black magic too..... And don't forget that the coach DID turn back into a pumpkin at midnight. I don't know about this guy of yours. How many others like you does he have?
Phateless Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 yeah it does... if it makes you feel any better i had a girl who i was talking to from a dating site for about a month for like 3 hours a day. she was calling me baby, telling me she wanted to be with me, etc. and on the day she was supposed to come down, she called to say she was on her way, then never showed. no call, no text, no return or anything, nothing... i know how you feel.
Trialbyfire Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 Don't you normally only suggest a break when you're in an exclusive relationship? He might have gotten scared off from how seriously you're taking this, for such a short period of time.
compassion42 Posted November 9, 2007 Posted November 9, 2007 Unfortunately your suggestion of a break seems to have turned into something permanent. I'd just let it go now and maybe he'll come back at some point but you've tried and that's about all you can do at this point.
Author Phoenix11 Posted November 9, 2007 Author Posted November 9, 2007 You are all correct. I should have never suggested a break. I did not know how to deal with the lull in the conversation and I was trying to be funny, maybe it came off as being sarcastic. Somethings don't translate , well via IM. I have to face the fact that he is just not into me anymore. If he was, he would have responded to my attempts to talk to him. I have been as sweet as friggin pie when I left him messages. I don't even know why I care so much anyway. It was just one date, no sex, nothing vested......but still I'm here all torqued over it. Down right depressed.
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